Life Partners Page #8

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You hit his car.

You didn't pay him for it.

I knew it.

I knew you thought I was wrong.

Why'd you lie to me?

'Cause it's easier

than disagreeing with you.

You can disagree with me.

Can I? Like, right now?

I am not mad at you because you're disagreeing

with me. I am mad because you lied to me.

Okay. Oh, great. So now

you're just walking away.

I can't talk to you sometimes. You

never see anyone else's side... ever.

You always get your way. It's

like every time we fight,

I have to be

the one to apologize.

- I'm not gonna do it this time.

- Oh, really? I always get my way?

Paige, I let you

f***ing dress me.

I do not dress you.

You can't even admit that?

This is just who I am.

- Well, then you suck.

- Great. Now you're just being a dick.

Maybe I just found my dick.

Whatever! You know, I deserve

to be with somebody...

who appreciates me

the way that I am.

And if you can't do that, then...

Gotcha.

A package does not

just disappear, Valerie.

I know. I'm trying to figure it out. FedEx

keeps telling me there's no record of it.

- Let me see the package log.

- No. I'll do it.

- What are you guys looking for?

- A package that was sent to China.

I don't even see any international

shipments on this log.

You know what? I am actually a

little bit behind on that log,

and FedEx loses packages

all the time, right?

Rarely. And this one

cost us a job.

They accepted a competing bid

because ours wasn't in on time.

Tim and I had a fight.

Oh, honey.

What did he do?

Shithead. I know.

Sasha.

Hey.

Hi!

Oh.

Yo. Hey.

Is Paige here?

No. No, just me.

What's new? Uh, not much.

Yeah? I got fired.

Oh, sh*t.

Sh*t. Sorry.

Paige didn't tell me.

Oh, she doesn't know.

I haven't seen her

since your barbecue.

Oh, man. I, um...

Wow. I knew you guys got in a

little fight over the setup, but...

Oh. That's what she said

it was about?

I'm guessing maybe

that wasn't the whole story?

Yeah. Yeah.

She has a way of doing that.

So then she probably didn't

tell you that...

we got in a fight.

She's staying at her mom's.

Really? What happened? Um...

Okay. Sorry.

It's none of my business.

No, it's fine. It's fine.

It's all right. It's...

It's kind of a long story,

but basically we're both

waiting for an apology.

From Paige?

Good luck with that.

Sorry about your job.

Yeah. There's nothing

like, you know,

getting fired from

an entry-level job...

right before

you turn 30 to just...

make you question everything.

Well, I wouldn't... I mean, I hope it's

not making you question everything.

Who cares about that job? You got

your music. That's the point, right?

I mean, that's your passion. Well,

it kind of has to be your passion...

when you spent your whole life saying

it's all you ever wanted to do, and...

your parents spent a shitload

of money on music school and...

I couldn't even quit

if I wanted to.

Do you want to? Whatever.

It's a little late

to turn back now.

Well, you know,

that is what I did, actually.

I used to want to, uh... I used

to want to work on Wall Street.

Really?

Wall Street was

my favorite movie as a kid,

and I went to business school

for a year, actually.

If you want to talk about

expensive schools, there you go.

What happened?

Uh, I f***ing hated

business school, so I quit.

I figured better to turn back now than spend

the rest of my life hating it, you know.

So where's your girlfriend?

Mia? She's not my girlfriend.

Please. She will be. She's

hot, and she worships you.

Speaking of worship, that

girl should be on a throne.

Damn.

Oh, my God. She's so desperate.

I was never that crazy

when I was single, was I?

I can't picture you single.

Yeah? Well, you don't

have to, baby.

Breathtaking.

Yeah, it's pretty. I still

don't know about a strapless.

I just feel like

it's falling off of me.

Oh, no. You're being crazy. They're

gonna make it fit like a glove.

See? This thing is not moving anywhere.

Mom. Okay. Okay.

Oh.

Oh. Whoa. Watch out. Watch out.

Where you going? Oh, honey, please do

not check to see if Tim's called again.

Come on. Let's stay on task.

Is this a yes? Maybe?

Mom, it's been two days. I mean, I haven't not

spoken to him in two days since I met him.

Well, why don't you let him

come to you in his own time?

Yeah, but what if

he doesn't call me?

I'll just give

you ladies a minute.

Thank you. He will. Come on.

Men are like children.

They'll do whatever you want.

They just have to think

that it's their idea.

Come here. Look at this. Do you

think he's gonna let that go?

Well, he might if you're scowling

like that. Come on. Smile.

We only get to do this once!

Hopefully.

Can we just

do this another time?

I feel weird looking at wedding dresses

when I'm not even speaking to my fianc.

Oh, come on. Let's do a couple more.

So is this a yes or a maybe?

- No. I don't like it.

- Now you're just being dramatic.

If you want my advice...

I don't want your advice.

You should listen. Twenty years from now,

when you look at these wedding pictures,

a strapless dress

will be so much more elegant.

What is with you

and a strapless?

I don't like it.

It's not me. It's a clich.

It's not flattering, and I'm

not wearing it for my wedding.

Fine. Why didn't you

just say so?

I've been trying to, but every

time I try to say something,

you just talk over me, and you

insist that you're right,

and it always

has to be your way.

Tim?

Tim?

Tim?

Hey, can I talk to you

for a second?

Oh, uh, guys, go in the

house right now, please.

Go right now. Oh. No, no, no.

I'm not gonna do anything. I...

I just wanted to tell you...

that I was texting

when I hit your car.

I know that it's...

I know that it's really dangerous, and

people have been killed like that,

and I need to stop, but first,

can I just pay for your bumper?

Yes.

Yeah. Yes, you can. Thank you.

Bear!

Hey.

How are you?

What are you doing here?

I just wanted to come hang out.

Oh.

I left you a message saying I'm not free.

Did you not get it?

Dude, I don't even know where

the f*** my phone is right now.

How high are you?

Ta-da!

I'm making you

matching mittens tomorrow.

You're gonna look so cute

in Alaska.

Alaska?

Oh, sh*t.

I forgot to surprise you.

Wait. Does that make sense?

Forgot to surprise you?

Anyway, Tegan and Sara are doing this

secret concert series in Alaska,

and for a week, you stay

in an igloo and do Molly,

and every morning you wake up, and

they're performing with, like,

a chorus of Latin monks.

What do you mean? They're Latin

American, or they sing in Latin?

I don't know.

Maybe they're not Latin.

Well, I can't go anyway, because

I really need to find a job.

You can do that

when we get back.

I mean, you can get

any receptionist job.

You've got, like,

eight years experience, right?

Yeah. Mm-hmm. I know.

Whatever. It's just till

you're done with your album.

I don't know if that's

what I want to do anymore.

What do you mean?

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