Little Murders Page #7

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answers to these questions.

You're gonna record every word

that's said. Do you understand?

And then you are going to bring

the whole thing back to me in here.

And we are going to learn why you are the way

you are instead of the way you have to be.

- I'm not going.

- You're fighting.

I'm not fighting

and I'm not going.

Christ, Alfred!

I wanna be married

to a big, strong, vital...

virile, self-assured man...

that I can protect

and take care of.

Alfred, you're the first man

I've ever gone to bed with...

where I didn't feel he was a lot more

likely to get pregnant than I was!

You've got to let me mold you.

Please let me mold you!

Oh, you've got me begging.

You've got me whining

and begging and crying.

I've never behaved like this

in my life.

Alfred, do you have any idea

how many people in this town...

worship me?

Maybe that's the attraction.

You don't worship me.

Alfred, you've got to change.

I'm not saying that I'm any better

or stronger than you are.

It's just that we...

you and I have

different temperaments.

And my temperament is better

and stronger than yours! You're a wall!

You... You don't fight.

You hardly even listen. Dear God,

will somebody please explain to me...

why I think you're so beautiful?

[Phone Ringing]

- Hello?

- [Heavy Breathing]

Leave me alone! What do you want

out of me? Will you please leave me alone?

She can't talk now!

[Sighs]

It's all sh*t.

How come I never noticed before?

- Patsy.

- You were right.

I'm just dense.

I'm the one who doesn't feel.

Come on, Patsy.

- No more reason for anything.

- Come on. Cut it out.

The only true feeling

is no feeling.

It's the only way to survive.

You were 100% right.

- Hold my hand.

- I feel weak.

Alfred, we can't both feel weak

at the same time.

You're beginning to

get me nervous, Patsy.

You're right.

I'm wrong.

Everything's the way you say.

You sit.

You get old.

You die.

[Airplane Passing By]

- [Woman] Who is it, Tubby?

- It's Alfred.

- Alfred who?

- Alfred Chamberlain.

My Alfred Chamberlain?

Tom Wolfe said

you can't go home again.

But I doubt if he meant that literally.

It was more likely a metaphor.

But he didn't come from Chicago.

North Carolina, Georgia, something like that.

Wolfe wasn't a racist, though.

I don't think he was.

An anti-Semite, I think, but not a racist.

Faulkner, though,

well, the character of Dilsey.

Brilliant, I think.

But today they probably

call her a handkerchief head.

Boo, here's the prodigal son.

[Chuckles]

Well, what a surprise, Alfred.

I mean, I wish you would have

told us you were coming.

- We would have invited some young people over.

- Hello.

Hello.

Oh, now, I must remember

what you drink.

- A martini, isn't it?

- I didn't drink when I lived here.

Oh, you have to have my martinis.

I am the best martini maker in the Midwest.

Everybody says so...

Harriet and Hank and...

Aren't we lucky that

we didn't go out tonight?

I mean, there's a new David Smith show

on at the museum.

Do young people

like David Smith?

We were supposed to go with Norm and Edie,

but I was in the middle of a Vonnegut.

Young people adore Vonnegut.

- I could still get a hold of Norm.

- I don't wanna go.

Ooh, there's a Visconti movie on.

And Arthur raves about it.

We could go to the late show.

The new Hopper is

at the three-penny cinema.

I don't wanna go to the movies.

Oh, you put on

some weight, Alfred.

But then you were 17 when you left.

Well, what have you been up to?

Well, I went to college,

and now I'm a photographer.

Oh. Cartier-Bresson...

and Man Ray are the only

photographers I know.

- I'll have to brush up.

- [Chuckles]

Well!

- Did you like college?

- No.

Do you like photography?

Oh, yeah.

Well, it's important for young people

to like what they do.

Also, I'm sort of married.

Well, I'll be darned.

- Peace.

- Brotherhood.

I often wondered whether

you were married or not.

Doesn't Boo make

a good martini?

The trick is in the vermouth.

Look, I don't wanna take

a lot of your time.

Patsy, my wife, worked out

a questionnaire...

a series of questions

about my childhood.

It's supposed to help me.

See, I don't remember

very much before I was 19.

- Well, Alfred, I don't mind answering questions...

- Nor do I.

If it'll help you, but I don't know

if I wanna be recorded.

Well, preserved for posterity.

I mean, do you really need that thing?

We could talk much more openly without it.

I need it. It'll help me.

Justice Holmes, I think it was,

hated wiretapping.

- I could look that up if you like.

- I might forget what you say.

Young people are just

so lazy about taking notes.

Well, I have nothing to say

that I mind being quoted on.

- It's the idea.

- It's the F.B.I.

I need it!

Was I a happy or an unhappy child?

- What is one to say?

- Well, every child has anxiety.

I mean, we're just not willing

to accept anxiety anymore.

Freud... I think it was Freud...

dates all anxiety back to the birth trauma.

Rank too.

- Was I breast-fed or bottle-fed?

- Sullivan.

Sullivan writes about

the significance of powerlessness.

Sullivan writes about

the significance of powerlessness.

It's years since

I've looked at Sullivan.

Doesn't Sullivan also

have something to say...

it could be Adler,

but I think it's Sullivan...

about the dynamism of apathy?

Dynamism of apathy.

That's a wonderful phrase.

The magical power of the cry.

You see, what Sullivan is saying

is that the cry brings help...

which leads to the correction

of the condition which led to the cry.

Was I difficult to toilet train?

- Uh, Klein.

- Klein speaks of the coupling

of early Oedipus wishes...

with the fear of castration.

The child's desire

to possess the mother's feces.

I mean, it's the anal-sadistic stage.

Ah. Sphincter-morality.

Ferenczi's phrase.

Ferenczi?

- Was I subject to temper tantrums?

- Uh...

"A tendency in boys to express

excessive aggression..."

"Originates in his fear

of castration."

"And coincides with the boy's protest

against the feminine role...

"rooted also in his...

[Both]

Dread ofhis mother..."

Y"Who he intends to rob

ofhis father's penis."

Was I a good or bad eater?

Uh, food.

I don't remember.

I don't remember.

Did I relate well to other children?

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

[Clears Throat]

When did I first exhibit signs of alienation?

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

- I don't remember.

In college the government couldn't decide

whether I was a security risk or not.

I used to protest a little then.

So they decided to put

a mail check on me.

Every day the mail

would come later and later.

Corners torn.

Never sealed correctly.

I was more of an activist then.

So I decided to fight fire with fire.

I began writing letters

to the guy who was reading my mail.

I addressed them to myself.

But inside they went

something like...

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