Little Thirteen Page #2

This way.

But what are we doing here?

What's with your garden, dude?

It smells of sh*t here!

It's not our garden.

- We're almost there.

Not so loud.

Don't you mow the grass at all?

- Man, it's not our garden!

So why are we here at all?

Why's the grass all wet?

This keeps getting worse.

Why are you drawing tits on him?

- Tits're all I can draw.

They look like sh*t.

- I'm sure yours are prettier.

Piggyback!

You'll fall down!

Where did you leave the key, man?

- I thought you put it down here.

There it is!

We've got some kind of schnapps, a beer

and vodka.

It's apricot brandy.

Did you bring the camera?

- No.

Why not?

What are you doing?

Squeaking around a little.

Sounds like you're f***ing the camp bed.

Can't you picture it?

- Lack of imagination.

You call that imagination?

F***ing a camp bed?

What's wrong with you, dude?

So tell us about your fantasies.

An electric toothbrush.

What are you laughing at?

I like a cell phone's vibration alarm.

And gyrating's good.

And towards the end you have to do it harder.

That's important.

Never just rub.

That's no good.

- We're no scratch cards.

It's not luck, but technique.

- First prize! Scratch card...

No, you need the right technique...

Right...

Want to show me the garden?

- Definitely. With pleasure.

Well, you go and

"have a look at the garden".

Got a blanket or something?

I'm cold.

Hey, wait, it's god-awful wet here.

- Wet?

Wait a sec.

I'll be right back.

Hey, I need the blanket. Give it to me.

- Are you crazy? Hey!

Got us a blanket.

Good thinking, right?

Are they still sitting there?

- Yes.

Go on!

Want the blanket?

- No...

My braces chafe a bit.

Get back on the blanket.

- Wait...

Did you bring a condom?

- No.

Sh*t.

- Never mind that now.

It's alright, I'm on the pill. Go on.

- You sure?

Dude!

Dead sure?

You worry too much.

Let's wait a little, okay?

Why?

We don't have to f***

on our first date, do we?

It's the second time we meet.

- Yes.

Do you think I'm stupid?

- You're not stupid, not ugly, either!

I never said that.

- Right, but...

We don't have to rush things, do we?

We can just wait a little, can't we?

You really don't think I'm pretty.

I think you're dead pretty!

You've got a wonderful smile.

And you're a great dancer.

Really?

- I saw you in the Manhattan.

So now what?

I don't know.

Tell me something about yourself.

What you like to do, don't like to do.

Doreen must've told you all that.

Is your mother always that way?

Yes.

This place is full of slugs

and other creepy-crawlies.

F***ing mosquitoes,

I hate them and everything that bites.

Here's a bad joke:

I only see one thing that bites around here.

And who might that be?

You're a great one to talk to.

I like that.

Hello.

Well?

So how was it?

Pretty good.

- Pretty good?

What?

- What's up with you? Everything okay?

He's a little tense.

He needs a massage.

What's up?

- Cut it out, dude.

What's going on with you two?

A little uptight?

What's wrong with you?

- Stop it, man!

Calm down, will you?

- What's up with you two?

Dude!

- F*** you, man!

Why did you throw away my cap?

- Because you were punching me, man!

Hold that.

- I'll do my best.

No, not over there.

Come here.

Hold still.

It's gonna look cool anyway.

Hold that.

- Like this?

Stop laughing.

Could you not smoke?

There are kids here!

So get your own apartment!

Chayenne,

shall I cut your brother's hair, too?

Hey, little man.

Shall we cut those? No?

- He's my son!

And the little girl?

- Hers, too.

Nothing to do with me.

Did you hurt yourself?

It happens in a flash, Doreen.

Before you know it you're a grandma.

Nele's woken up!

Nele's woken up.

Nele's woken up!

Nele's woken up!

Here's something to drink...

Nele.

Listen,

Mom's asleep.

... and here you can see a shooting star,

so make a wish!

I hope to see you all again tomorrow...

When are the holidays over?

When are the holidays over?

Not for a while.

I don't want jam!

I want Nutella.

I want Nutella!

I want Nutella!

Stop bugging me!

But I want Nutella!

- There is no Nutella!

Show us your ass cheeks, baby!

Hey, darling.

Still here?

I'm starving.

Make me one, too.

Jessi's already got two grandchildren.

Quiet!

What was that about?

- Nothing. Carry on.

What?

- Sh*t.

So how was it?

What?

- What's he like?

You saw for yourself.

Do I have to worm everything out of you?

- He's better than Maik anyway.

Does he still serve the same

old three-course meal?

Groping, on top and doggie style?

- He gave me a curve.

A what?

A curve.

It's a dildo, but it's bent.

For a better feeling.

So, a dildo with a handle?

It's very practical.

Wanna see it?

I'll lend it to you.

- No...

Coffee?

- In the kitchen.

Morning.

He's damn sexy.

I know.

- So tell me about him.

Well, he's...

He's very different.

- Different? How?

Just different.

The way...

The way he touches you is so...

Gentle?

- Yes!

Yes, he's very gentle.

I think he's real sexy.

He looks so natural.

Listen, I'll lend you my curve,

you lend me Lukas.

Can I at least join in some time?

No.

You're a real square,

you know that?

I'm a square, am I?

- Yes.

I mean, we always share everything.

- But not Lukas.

Don't get all huffy.

Go on, piss off.

F*** you then.

- Yeah, f*** you, too.

PUZZLE COMPLETE?

COMPLETE:

You take Nele.

I can't.

- Please take Nele.

I'm busy.

Yvonne.

- I have to work.

Take her.

See you later.

Good morning, Ms. Panitz.

Or shall I call you Charlotte?

How are you?

What's with the employment training

the job center offered you? - Can't go.

You can't go?

- I can't go.

Why not?

I'm pregnant.

Are you sure?

If you want to test me,

I could piss into your coffee cup.

By the way,

what did the guy say yesterday?

I've been meaning to ask you, man.

Hello!

- What?

What did the guy say yesterday?

- Yeah.

What do you mean, yeah?

- Do you think I should work out, too?

Hey, why did he pay us so damn little?

He wants them younger and

the film bad-asser. Now close this thing.

What?

I always told you so!

What age is that chick of yours?

- 13.

How old?

- She's 13, man!

That's the perfect age!

I won't do it with Sarah, okay?

- What? Why not?

F*** you.

- No, f*** you, man!

Yeah, yeah.

Are you in love?

- Yeah, dream on!

Sure you are.

Look at this.

Mommy!

- Can they be reprogrammed?

No idea.

It matches my nails.

It's even got a crown!

Can I help you?

What are you doing?

Can they be reset?

- Excuse me?

So they'll say "daddy".

- Well, I think...

No, they...

All they can say is "mommy".

- No wonder you men can't practice.

Hey, are you crazy?

Mommy!

Lisa told me about Ben.

They have a kid, too, now.

With you it doesn't matter

what undies you wear.

I look hot anyway,

or because they never stay on long?

They never stay on long!

Let's keep an eye out.

You look to the right, I'll look to the left.

Look, it bites her nipple.

Oh, this is nice.

How may I help you?

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