Living It Up Page #6

I'm taking my stuff

and I'm going across the hall,

so you and Wally can have

the whole place to yourselves.

Thanks a lot.

And believe me,

I don't give you three weeks to live.

Yes?

- Hi, Steve.

- Hi.

I know it's bad luck,

but I wanted to see Homer

before the wedding.

But I wanted to see Homer

before the wedding.

Well, he's gone.

Don't worry. You couldn't be that lucky.

He's around here somewhere.

- Wally.

- Please, Steve, let go of me.

You're not gonna go through with it,

are you?

- Yes.

- Why?

Because the world owes Homer

a little happiness.

You're not the world.

You're in love with me.

You are, aren't you?

- What are we going to do about it?

- Nothing.

You'll just have to wait until

Homer's gone.

I should live so long.

Wally.

We are gathered here together

to join this man and this woman

in bonds of holy matrimony.

If any of you know

any just or legal reason

why these two

should not be thus joined,

speak now or forever hold your peace.

Do you, Wally Cook, take Homer Flagg

to be your lawful wedded husband,

to love, honour and cherish him,

to comfort him

in sickness and in health?

I do.

And you, Homer Flagg,

do you take this woman

to be your lawful wedded wife?

No, because she doesn't love me.

- Homer.

- Well, it's true. You just pity me.

You were only marrying

a sinus condition, anyhow.

- Now, Homer.

- Bye.

But, Homer, no.

What's the matter with him?

What did he mean?

Oh, it's sad. His case is more advanced

than I thought.

You see, the poisoning has reached

his lobus maximus.

- His what? His lobus...

- Maximus.

- Let me get to him first.

- All right.

Mayor, help me get through.

Homer, what are you doing?

I'm packing my things

and I'm going back to Desert Hole,

where I'll never have to

wear these again.

You acted like a man,

but you can't run away.

Yeah? Well, she'll be after me again,

begging me to marry her.

And next time, I'll be too weak to resist,

and I'll hate myself

every morning for years.

You can't hide. You're a national figure.

Well, I don't feel like a national figure.

I'm just gonna sneak away

with my hat over my eyes

through the park and down the alley.

Then on a boat to Sing Sing.

- Wally.

- Protect me.

Don't let her come in.

If she kisses me again, I'm a goner.

You got my word, but if she gets

past me, there's no way out.

- What'll I do?

- I'll leave that entirely up to the boy

who was quick-witted enough

to get us into this mess.

I told her

it reached your lobus maximus.

- You take it from there.

- Oh, you mean...

Yeah.

Is he in there?

Well? Well? Well?

I'd much rather you wouldn't see him

- in his present condition.

- Well, what's the matter with him?

No, no, the Doctor's absolutely right,

Wally.

- We'll just send in a photographer.

- No, I want to know the worst.

Look, Doctor,

I want to talk to you a moment, just...

- Homer!

- Where are you?

- Homer?

- Where is he? What happened to him?

We're over target! Bombs away!

Hurrah! A direct hit!

Bombs away!

Bombardier to pilot. Reload!

Homer, don't you know who I am?

Yes. You're our commanding officer.

And we'll win the war for you, too.

I told you not to come in.

Espionage, eh? Bombs away!

Direct hit, men.

- Major.

- Yes?

Is it all right if I send someone in

to photograph you

for the Air Force Journal?

No. You're an enemy!

This is silly.

Direct hit.

Please try and forget.

Oh, but...

Direct hit! Good work, men.

All right, Homer.

Homer, come on. Come on down.

Come on.

Will you stop playing games

and get down here?

- You still here? Go on home.

- Oliver, you've got to listen to me.

There are just three doctors,

three great men in this world,

who really know the score

on radiation poisoning.

- They might save him. Yes.

- Save him?

This whole town is getting

tired of the way he's hanging on.

There's such a thing as too much pluck.

- Besides, our circulation is dropping.

- Then this is the way to build it up.

We'll make it your personal campaign.

Think of the headlines, Oliver.

"Humanitarian Editor

Saves Hero's Life."

Why, they'll be

building monuments to you.

And there's always politics, Oliver.

Think what it means to be a senator.

Your mail goes free.

I'm not interested in personal glory,

but it might sell some newspapers.

You get those doctors on the phone.

Yes, sir.

- Long distance, please.

- Long distance?

Wait a minute, where are they?

California?

- Oh, no, one's in Hong Kong.

- No.

- One in Vienna.

- No.

- And one in Paris.

- No.

Hello. I'm calling for Oliver Stone.

I'd like to place a call

to Dr Chung See Lee,

Hong Kong General Hospital,

Hong Kong.

Thank you. The operator.

Look, operator, let me know

when my three minutes are up.

Steve, are you still so set against

any other doctors looking at Homer?

- That's the last thing I'd want to see.

- But if they didn't treat him,

if they just took him to Belleflower

Hospital and looked him over?

That's the last thing I want to see.

Can't we talk about something else?

We've had a beautiful morning.

You dragged me out of bed at 8:30.

I think we've fed every squirrel

in Central Park.

Oh, no, don't bother. You've had me

eating out of your hand long ago.

I guess I'd better get back to the office.

What's the matter?

I've been looking all over town

for that perfume.

Isn't this lovely?

Let me buy you a quart.

$104.

Just take a sniff and let's go.

- Do you think you can afford even that?

- Oh, I'm loaded.

- You saw my office in Desert Hole.

- Oh, luxurious.

I own all the adhesive tape outright.

After all...

Financial responsibility

is a day to day affair

But for the first time in my life

I'm beginning to care

Money burns a hole in my pocket

How I wish I had millions of dollars

and nothing to do

but just buy pretty presents for you

Money burns a hole in my pocket

How I wish I had oil wells in Texas

to keep me supplied with money

while I sit by your side

Every day of the week

we would visit the stores

All the beautiful things you seek

would soon be yours

'Cause money

burns a hole in my pocket

So I'm bringing you perfume and candy

and roses of red

And wishing

they were diamonds instead

Come on, cut it out, fellas!

I'm being forced into this!

Wait till Dr Harris finds out.

You guys will be in trouble.

We'll set him down here

while we open the door.

- Look out! Look out!

- Stop that man!

- Homer!

- Taxi! Taxi!

- Taxi!

- Come back here, Homer!

Homer! Come back, Homer!

- Come back here, Homer!

- Taxi!

I'm Homer Flagg.

They're after me. Let's go!

- You bet we will.

- Good.

Oh, no! These are the guys!

What happened here? Convention?

Oh, nothing to worry about, Doctor.

Your patient's safely on his way

to the hospital.

Oh, fine. Fine.

- My patient! Hospital! What hospital?

- Belleflower.

- What?

- Belleflower!

Belleflower! Belleflower?

You know what they'll do to him?

They'll examine him!

You knew it all the time.

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