Loco Love Page #4

That's cool.

Is your dad a gardener?

Yeah, he used to be.

But now he's a hot shot,

you know.

He's got like 15 lawnmowers

and two vans.

He is what you call a landscaper.

Oh, sh*t. Oh, no.

GAVIN:
Let me see that.

Let me see that.

No. No!

I don't think you'd starve,

are you kidding me?

You weren't supposed to see that.

Let me see.

Alright, let me see.

Don't!

No!

You are an artist.

That's cool.

Sh*t.

(LAUGHTER)

(GROANS)

No!

Dude, you can't be

walking around like that.

No, it's not that bad.

(SCOFFS)

Yeah, right.

Really, it's not that big.

Dude, we need to find you something.

I'm gonna like rip this more

every time I see it.

It could be worse.

Come on.

What are you doing?

Where are we going?

What? Whoa, whoa... What are you doing?

You know there's people here?

I know that. But, like, this is my dad's

and it will fit you.

And you can't be wearing

that anymore.

I don't know about that.

You can have something from me.

Okay.

Okay?

Fine.

There you go.

Hurry up. There's people staring at us.

I'll get your bag.

Alright!

No!

Come on!

Stop!

Hey!

There you go.

Woops.

Hey.

It's a sin to throw food away,

man, especially popcorn.

F*** you!

TET:
Come on, Kiko.

Don't be rude.

Now I have two traitors.

What are you looking at, a**hole?

I don't speak Spanish.

I said, "What are you

looking at, a**hole?"

Kiko!

What did you just call me?

Luke!

Come with me, sugar.

A**hole, you're gonna get it.

Damn it, let's go!

Wake up, honey, we're leaving.

Hey! Let's go.

What the f*** are you wearing?

Don't even, man.

You f***ed that girl, didn't you?

You dirty little skank!

I didn't, I didn't.

Yeah, you f***ing did.

No, I didn't!

How was she, man?

Oh, give it up!

A little bit of hot sauce,

a little bit of Tapatio.

Did you taste that taco?

F*** you!

Who the f*** is that guy anyways?

I don't know, some Chvez, dude.

Hey, do you want this?

Are you serious?

Yeah. Do you want it or not?

F***, yeah, man. Absolutely.

It's the butcher.

Sure you want to give me this?

Yeah. Let's go.

(ENGINE STARTS)

I don't know what you see

in those a**holes.

I hate gringos.

Well, too bad because half

of your family is gringo, dude.

Oh, yeah, baby. Gringo, gringo, gringo.

Yeah!

Yes, but I'm not that

kind of gringo. I'm cute.

Have you heard this guy?

Luke, do you want a beer?

Sure.

Thank you.

DAD:
Hey, you guys, come in here!

Well, we're joining

the Clayton Brothers Brigade.

Come on in here, son.

You ready to go hunt some Mexicans?

LUKE:
F***, yeah!

What the f*** is that?

What?

That shirt! No f***ing way, Jos.

Dad.

Take it off!

Come on, Mr. Hayes.

It's just a joke.

A joke? Well, I'm not laughing.

Take it off before I rip it off.

Dad! Just leave me alone!

I don't want any spics in this house,

even if it's on a goddamn T-shirt.

LUKE:
I got you.

(CELLPHONE RINGS)

Where are we going?

It's a surprise.

This is the mural

that I wanted to show you.

Look this right here.

You're gonna die.

Mm.

It's not even that hot.

Uh-huh.

Oh!

Yeah, that's what I thought.

(LAUGHING)

It's so hot!

Oh, my...

I can't believe it.

No, they are freaking kissing!

You have to be kidding me.

That's disgusting.

(GROANS)

Okay, let's just go.

What's up, cousin?

Look at you! You've gringoed up.

Do you like being here already?

It's just the clothes,

I'm still from Sonora.

People here don't even know

who they are.

Do you mean me?

I don't know who I am?

Who's that white guy you're into?

You too?

What, cause he's white

I don't know who I am?

Easy, cousin. Don't take it out on me.

If you're into him,

it's your problem, right?

But he better know how lucky he is.

He knows. Trust me.

Anyways, today we are gonna have

so much fun.

See, you even forgot your Spanish.

I didn't forget it.

What's this?

I don't know, try it.

Come on, eat, we're leaving.

It's so good.

GIRL:
Don't you see she's upset?

He's there.

CHRIS:
Have we broken up, Gavin?

Huh?

Tell me,

'cause I didn't get any notice.

What are you talking about, Chris?

Who's that slut?

You know, the spic

you kissed at the mall.

We saw you

with that Mexican girl.

You kissed a... a Mexican spic?

Yeah, I did. And what's worse?

That I kissed another girl

or that she's Mexican?

Hey, Chrissy, like,

don't worry about it.

He's totally not worth it...

Don't touch me!

GIRL:
Chrissy...

RAMN:
Come, I want to show you something.

MARISOL:
No, Ramn, let's go. Don't start.

I wanna show you something.

Come here.

I wanna show you something.

Just come here!

What's with you?

(RAMN SHUSHING) Give me a kiss.

A kiss. I want you to give me

a f***ing kiss.

RAMN:
What's the f***ing matter

with your cousin?

She doesn't want to.

Respect her, that's all.

She doesn't want to

because she doesn't want to,

or because she's really

dating a gringo?

She doesn't want to, man.

I hate him!

He totally doesn't deserve you.

Just like... stop thinking about him.

Hi, girls.

How are you doing?

You are a cheat son of b*tch.

Get away from me.

What are you talking about?

Hey, why are you so mad at me?

You should be screaming

at your f***ing boyfriend, not at me.

Girls, guard the door.

Okay.

Come on.

TET:
If you don't speak,

God can't hear you.

Do you want to be my girlfriend?

Girlfriend?

Yes. Do you want to or not?

Was it that difficult to say?

Asking me?

Is that a yes?

Yes.

You didn't tell me

Gavin as cheating on me.

So what? You were cheating

on him... with me.

We made out once,

and it meant nothing to me.

Oh, really?

I don't remember it like that.

Besides, Gavin is too busy

eating burritos now. He's over you.

No one dumps me.

Not him, not you and not anybody.

Do you want revenge?

You and me.

MARISOL:
Girl, do not even pull that...

You kissed...

Okay, I kissed him, I kissed him.

I kissed him.

And?

And it was really nice,

I don't know.

Was he a gentleman,

or was he a total caballero with you?

Was he, like, super sweet?

He was a gentleman.

Hey, guys. Take a look.

Yeah, what's up?

Come.

(WHISPERING)

Wait, careful.

(MARISOL WHISPERING) Wait.

(GUNSHOT)

What the f*** is your problem,

motherf***er?

You could've killed someone!

I know what I'm doing,

don't mess with me.

You were going to eat

the f***ing rabbit. Respect.

We don't respect anyone here.

Did you forget how the f***ing gringos

wanted to hunt you?

MARISOL:
Ramn, what the

hell is wrong with you?

Don't you ever forget that. Ever.

Li!

See you.

MARISOL:
Okay, yeah. Let's go.

KIKO:
What?

We're leaving.

What?

Let's go.

Pack up the things, guys.

Where are we?

Is this where you live?

Yeah, come on.

I just need to grab a few things.

Only my grandpa is home,

he's always sleeping anyways though.

I thought you said you had a sister.

I do. Her room is upstairs.

Hey, look. That's my family.

That's my mom right there.

She's beautiful.

Yeah, she is.

Oh, my gosh. Is this you?

Yes!

Wow, you are a cutie.

Thank you.

Hey, look at this. This is my grandpa.

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