Lolita Page #4

You're very welcome.

What drives me insane is

the twofold nature of this nymphet...

...of every nymphet, perhaps.

This mixture in my Lolita of tender,

dreamy childishness...

...and a kind of eerie vulgarity.

I know it is madness to keep this journal,

but it gives me a strange thrill to do so...

...and only a loving wife could decipher

my microscopic script.

In this house, we do not eat

with the table on the elbows...

...elbows on the tables.

Must you pamper your pimples?

Do you mind if I eat?

I've got to meet Mona.

This morning you have to meet Mona!

Last night...

First you wash every dish,

then you go upstairs...

...and make your bed

and clean up your room.

I am not picking up after you today, miss,

or any day!

Hello. Excuse me.

- Is it Kenny?

- No. Just a minute.

Jean, just a second.

Take this tray up to Professor Humbert

and do not disturb him.

Yes, ma'am!

Yes, ma'am.

Jean?

I'm very glad you called.

Yes.

Mona?

What time?

Well, I'm very glad you called me, Jean.

Well, there's something very important

we both have to talk about.

That's a good idea. Well, I'd rather not...

Who is it?

Lolita.

Come in.

Here's your breakfast.

Thank you very much. Good morning!

Good morning.

Don't tell Mom, but I ate all your bacon.

You have a very long face today.

Oh, yeah?

What were you writing?

I was writing a poem.

What's it about?

It's about people.

That's a novel subject.

You know, it's funny, it sort of looked

like a diary when I came in.

I always write my poems in a diary.

It's one of my little idiosyncrasies.

Afraid somebody's going to steal

your ideas and sell them to Hollywood?

Perhaps. Would you like me

to read you some poetry?

Sure, why not?

This is my favorite poet.

- "It was... "

- Who's the poet?

The divine Edgar.

Who's the divine Edgar. Edgar who?

Edgar Allan Poe, of course.

"It was night in the lonesome October

"Of my most immemorial year"

Notice how he emphasizes this word.

"It was hard by the dim lake of Auber

"In the misty mid region of Weir"

You see, he takes a word like "dim"

in one line and twists it?

And it comes back as "mid region of Weir. "

"Mid region," and twists it to "dim. "

That's pretty good, pretty clever.

"Thus I pacified Psyche and kissed her

"And conquered her scruples and gloom

"And we passed to the end of the vista

"But were stopped by the door of a tomb

"And I said, 'What is written, sweet sister? '

"She replied, 'Ulalume, Ulalume. "'

Well, I think it's a little corny,

to tell you the truth.

What do you object to?

Well, the "vista-sister," that's like,

"Lolita-sweeter. "

That's very true.

That's a very acute observation.

If you were in my class

I would give you an A plus.

Tell me, was Mona Farlow annoyed

when you left her party last night?

Mona? Annoyed?

Well, I thought she might be

looking forward to...

Don't worry about Mona.

- Let me tell you something about Mona.

- Do, please.

No, I'd better not tell you. You'll blab.

I will never give away any of your secrets.

- You wouldn't?

- I promise.

Well, for that you get a little reward.

Thank you very much.

- Here!

- Oh, no, please. No.

Lolita. No.

Put your head back.

Put your head back.

Open your mouth.

You can have one little bite.

Lolita?

Lolita!

What?

Come down here.

What do you want?

Firstly...

...when I call you I want you

to come right down...

...and not make me holler for you

from room to room.

Yes, ma'am.

Secondly, I want you to go

right into your room and put on a dress.

I'm going to the Farlows

and I want you to come.

But I'm supposed to meet Mona

at the lake.

And lastly, I forbid you

to disturb Professor Humbert again.

He is a writer and he is not

to be disturbed.

Sieg heil.

I have a glorious surprise for us.

One of your dramatic sweets?

Guess again.

The Farlows have been arrested.

Really, Hum. Thank you, Louise.

I'm no good at guessing.

Mona Farlow is leaving

for summer camp tomorrow.

Lolita is going with her.

You were absolutely right

when you warned me...

...that I was getting too liberal

with her about boys.

What's more, Mona disappeared

from that party last night...

...and she did not come home till 4:00 a. m.

So Jean and I decided

that isolation from boys...

...would be the best thing

for both of the girls this crucial summer.

Do you think that the camp is the answer?

Frankly, Hum, I do. It's all arranged.

The Farlows and I phoned

the camp long-distance...

...and I did all the shopping this...

Is something the matter with your face?

Toothache.

You poor man.

If it still pains you tomorrow,

I'll call and arrange an appointment.

How far away is this camp?

Two hundred miles.

It was a stroke of genius on Mama's part.

Ain't I clever?

Shall we take our coffee out to the piazza...

...or do you want to go upstairs

and nurse that tooth?

Nurse the tooth.

I'll be right back.

I guess I won't be seeing you again.

I shall be moving on.

I must prepare for my work

at Beardsley College in the fall.

Then I guess this is goodbye.

Yes.

Don't forget me.

Are you upstairs, Mr. Humbert?

Mr. Humbert!

Mrs. Haze asked me to give you this.

Thank you very much.

"This is a confession.

"I love you.

"Last Sunday in church, my dear one,

when I asked the Lord...

"... what to do about it,

I was told to act as I am acting now.

"You see, there is no alternative.

"I have loved you from the minute

I saw you.

"I am a passionate and lonely woman...

"... and you are the love of my life.

"Now you know.

"So you will please, at once,

pack and leave.

"This is a landlady's order.

I am dismissing a lodger.

"I am kicking you out.

Go, scram, departez!

"I shall be back by dinnertime.

I do not wish to find you in the house.

"You see, cherie...

"... if you decided to stay,

if I found you at home...

"... which I know I won't...

"... and that's why I'm able

to go on like this...

"... the fact of your remaining

would only mean one thing: That you...

"... that you want me as much as I do you...

"... as a lifelong mate...

"... and you are ready to link up your life

with mine forever and ever...

"... and be a father to my little girl.

"Goodbye, dear one.

"Pray for me...

"... if you ever pray. "

Hum?

Hum, baby.

The wedding was a quiet affair...

...and when called upon to enjoy

my promotion from lodger to lover...

...did I experience only bitterness

and distaste?

No, Mr. Humbert confesses

to a certain titillation of his vanity...

...to some faint tenderness,

even to a pattern of remorse...

...daintily running along the steel

of his conspiratorial dagger.

Dear, the door's locked.

Sweetheart, I don't want

any secrets between us.

It makes me feel insecure.

Can't this wait till I come out of here?

I suppose...

Hum, what do you do in there so long?

I want to talk to you.

I haven't been here long.

In point of fact, I only just came in.

Were there a lot of women

in your life before me?

I've told you about them already.

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