Lolo Page #4

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This is white, white, white!

Okay, just do something.

Gah! This is a disaster.

We have a

color harmony issue.

- We open in 45 minutes.

- Change the gels.

We have 15 minutes

to make it work.

15 minutes!

Okay.

There you go.

Thanks.

Still seeing "Thingamajig"?

All the time.

Jeez, for a one-night stand,

he's tenacious.

Yeah, turns out

we're a great fit.

No sh*t. A clitoral

with an eager licker.

You're vaginal,

subtlety's beyond you.

You mean, I don't wait years

for a do-gooder to hit the spot.

Speaking of vaginal, I am flying

to Greece tomorrow for the shoot.

I can't come to

your charity gala.

- Damn!

- Your man's going?

Yes. Lolo's helping him

to find an outfit.

- Lolo helping him?

- Yes.

They are buddies.

They keep yapping about computers.

They love it.

- That's mine?

- No.

- It is.

- No.

Stop hoarding my food.

Uh, you are so bitchy.

Awesome,

the Eiffel Tower.

- It's a partial view

but better than nothing.

Your daughter?

Pretty.

- Sabine. She's your age.

- Really?

Look.

You got anything else?

I'm not sure if I want

to go to the party.

It's not my place, I know no one,

I'll feel out of place.

Stop, J.R.

You know me.

That would be enough.

She invited you,

that's important for her.

- You think?

- Of course.

I am delighted that

you two are together.

It's a weight off my shoulders.

The last few years have been tough,

with guys bailing on her.

For a woman her age,

it's not easy.

I'm counting on you.

You can.

The beige jacket

in the hall's not bad.

I'll go get it.

Here. Look...

- No?

- No.

Want to go shopping?

Why not?

Great idea.

You crazy!

It's in the future.

From Dr. Frankenstein,

he saw a man without passion.

He explained that the human race

was sentenced,

that space was closed to him.

That the only link...

What are you looking at?

They have wifi-enabled

security cameras in every corner.

They must have a multi-petabyte

array to store months of footage.

Amazing for a museum.

State-of-the-art.

This is the Pompidou Center,

not the Brittany Naval Museum.

Sorry.

You haven't stopped scratching

since we got here.

Are you allergic to art?

No, it started in the subway.

Let me see.

Oh!

You're red all over!

Is... is...

Is it eczema?

I never had it before.

It itches all over.

Ar!

I'll call someone who's

an expert on skin diseases.

I'll be right back.

Skin disease?

The shock was too strong.

After viewing...

It's me.

Is this a bad time?

You who know anything

about venereal disease?

Of course,

that's my speciality.

Can I call you back?

I'm busy.

No, no.

It's urgent.

Jean has rashes

all over his body.

It's food.

Even the willy?

Ar!

You said he was clean.

You think it's AIDS?

Don't start that again.

You've been doing that for 25 years.

You are not asking if you can

catch AIDS giving a blow-job!

Blow-jobs?

Look, keep calm.

I'm 100% sure

it's not that.

- What then?

- I don't know.

Don't rub up against

him tonight.

Love you. Kisses!

Everything alright?

Yes.

My best friend.

She is a hypochondriac,

you know?

It's a Greek word.

Oh my God!

Everything is Greek!

But your smile.

Your smile is so French.

Ah, the Greeks!

Interesting.

A film-essay, is that right?

Yes.

You should see a doctor tomorrow.

I know one who is a friend.

Maybe it's a virus.

I'm also feeding kind of... crappy.

- Maybe it's contagious.

- What?

The virus is making me itchy.

If it's even a virus.

I feel terrible.

I need to go to bed early.

Do you mind if I sleep alone?

I feel bloated.

We haven't even had dinner.

Forget it.

I'm not feeling well.

Thank you.

I try to share fairly,

but there are so many.

You think I'm silly?

No, it's just that

I don't see them anymore.

Well,

enjoy your evening.

- Huh, okay.

- Yeah.

- See you tomorrow.

- See you tomorrow.

- Call me.

- Yes.

Beautiful.

Alright?

I'm itching all over.

Jean too.

Really?

You're not a kid,

you use protection?

The south-west is famous

for its swinger clubs.

- Really?

- Of course!

South-west...

Foie gras [French delicacy "fatty livers"]

rugby...

Swingers clubs!

"Clubs swingers Biarritz"

The Foie Gras Swingers?!

Oh!

Nothing out of the ordinary.

You've been to the countryside?

No.

But are you a country boy?

No, I'm from Biarritz.

There you go.

It's the change of environment.

From the fresh air

to the smog of Paris.

You can't handle the pollution.

Or it could be the dust

in your apartment.

Where do you live?

Beaugrenelle Towers.

They built with anything back then.

Wash all your clothes

and your apartment thoroughly.

Violette doesn't need to worry.

She asked me to

prescribe a few tests.

A few tests?

The lab around the corner

is expecting you.

Urethral swab,

HIV 1, HIV 2,

gonorrhea,

herpes simplex 1 and 2,

hepatitis B - C,

chlamydia, trichomoniasis,

syphilis and chancroid.

No, are you kidding?

Ah! And HPV! It's new.

[Human Papillomavirus Infection]

It's new?

The famous

oral sex cancer.

You know, Michael Douglas?

He's an actor.

Ah.

40 grands, not possible.

So, we lose the chandeliers?

Definitely not.

I'll come up with something.

How's my pumpkin?

I forgot my mobile and the keys.

I locked myself out.

- Can I take yours?

- Of course, sure.

I don't like it when I

can't get hold of you.

Lulu, okay?

- You've lost weight.

- Thanks.

Basketball.

I'm his fitness trainer.

I screwed up

with Jean-Ren.

Again?

My disease phobia.

Not the tests again?

Mommy dear,

you need to make it up.

Go get him

a big ass lunch.

Good idea.

Come on.

I do not even know

where he works.

Go!

Pass, pass!

No.

- Pass!

- Attack, attack!

Timeout.

You have your phone with you?

You told your mom you didn't.

It's a trick... to get her

keys away from her,

so tonight she'll have

to sleep at his place.

I'm sick of them

groaning all night.

I'm totally open-minded

but I can't take any more.

A stranger in my own home.

Damn, you're right,

the guy's way out of line.

Yeah.

She'll see where he works

and will get panic.

Hey, she wouldn't

want to f*** him!

He's laughing.

Well done!

I would have been quicker on foot.

Thanks for the excursion!

Right.

All the way down,

turn right on the end.

Thank you.

Thanks.

I did all your tests.

You forgot to ask for Ebola.

That's not an STD.

- Next.

- Dish of the day.

It was tough with

Eloi's dad cheated on me

and all these guys sleeping around

- It is hard to trust again.

- Thank you.

- Madam?

- Green beans.

Violette, I was with my wife

for 20 years, and...

- And the swingers clubs?

- The what?

Nothing.

Thank you.

- Since then?

- Since then, nothing much.

- I apologize for the tests.

- It was nothing.

A quick blood sample and

a cotton swab in the urethra.

That must have hurt.

Horrible.

I'm so sorry.

You're a bit lunatic,

but I like being with you.

Yo do?

I almost died

a few years ago.

Really?

Not a contagious disease.

- An accident.

- Oh.

Auh, an accident?

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