Love Is a Four Letter Word Page #6

You get off a three?

I do.

But I have a bridal

shower to attend.

You wanna come?

Is this the thing where you

need to dress like a woman?

Yes, and it will be lot's of fun.

Why don't you just

come over after.

You can come to

the party to, Zeke.

I've got wigs to spare.

No thanks. I'll be at home.

Washing my sheets.

I swear, Madeleine - men in New

York they drive you to drink.

I have to say you look

real good in that Burka.

You think I'll get any today?

Has a man in drag ever

gotten laid? Ever?.

Luke, don't spill any of that, Ok?

My name is Conness du C*nt.

Everybody, look who just arrived.

Hey.

Marilyn, congratulations.

Oh, thanks Luke.

I hear your dating someone too.

Unbelievable, no?

Is he here?

No, he had to work.

He's a hustler.

It's perfect.

That's such a cop out.

Come Marilyn, lets go put

that in the bedroom...

with the other presents.

So, how are things

going with the hustler?

I call him Stephen.

Oh, so it's serious

then. Maybe love?

No. Absolutely not.

It's anything but serious.

It's not serious at all. Just fun.

For now.

Ah, the lady doth

protest too much...

I'm not even sure there

is such as thing as love.

What our society

refers to as love -...

seems to be all about power

struggle and addiction.

People will do anything

they can to get love.

And once they get it, they'll

do anything to keep it.

Give me my love fix and

I'll make your dinner,

wash your socks and

give up my freedom.

Give me my love now.

Or I'm going to make you

pay, you f***ing pig.

And so on and so forth.

Hmm. Or love can be about...

two people helping

each other grow.

Yeah. And where does the love go

once your done growing?

After it all ends?

You know, the last guy

I was serious about...

I knew there was one.

It was really intense, you know.

We really meant

everything to each other.

He had my back.

And then it ended.

I ran into him last year,

and I go up to him. All excited.

All warm inside. Like I

want to hug him all over.

Like he still meant so much to me.

And I run up to him and he says -...

'What up, Luke? '

And that was it.

All those powerful moments.

All the 'I love you's.'

And in the end, that's all it's worth.

A frigid 'What up, Luke? '

Peter, how did you know

that you were gay?

Uh, I just knew.

But... How did you know?

Um. You know, it feels natural,

like writing with my right hand.

But couldn't you learn to

write with your left hand?

Well... Probably, but my

penmanship would be sh*t,

and it would feel real awkward.

Hi Peter. I brought a cake.

From the Hamptons.

Thank you, Edie.

Congratulations, Marilyn.

Thanks.

So you never questioned

your sexuality?

Um. No. Never.

Why not?

I'm just not into women.

Have you ever been

with a woman?

No. I have not.

So how do you know

you're not into them?

Marilyn -...

you and I are friends, ok?

That's not what I meant.

Look at this -

Little black marks

all over my floor.

There was this pervert

who hid in the woods...

behind my junior high school...

and flashed some of the girls.

I used to wander in those

woods everyday after school...

hoping and praying that

he would flash me.

It never happened.

But that's how I knew I was gay.

Derek, what's going on here?

Conness and I were just having

a little heart to heart...

and please, call me La Ronda

La Ronda, take off those pumps.

They're scuffing up my parquet.

Ok, you need to

leave me alone and...

who's La Ronda

without her pumps?

She's the woman who's

going to be on her knees...

scrubbing the kitchen

floor tomorrow.

You see why I prefer the

life of a single gal?

Leave my man alone, slut.

Slut?. Am I a slut?

Are you a slut?.

I can't speak for my ass.

It's public property

What's wrong with you people?

Don't you want somebody

to wake up with?

Who you know will be there

through sickness and in health?

Till death do you part?

God knows that's what I want.

You know it is quite

a beautiful feeling.

Why are you all so

in love with love?

I just want to be able

to unhinge my jaw...

like an anaconda.

Right?. I mean why I can't I

enjoy sex for the sake of sex...

without being labelled a slut?

It's really not our fault, Conness.

I mean we're attractive and social,

so we meet a lot of people.

Precisely. And it's our

duty to take advantage...

of the opportunities

presented us in life.

Sluttiness is life affirming.

Slut is a four letter word for YES.

I can't believe you came

over here wearing that.

Do you know, I have

closet case clients...

who would happily bash

you in the street?

Did you know I was bashed once?

In the West Village. Unbelievable.

Were you in drag?

Are you suggesting it

would be justified?

No, of course not.

Yes you are.

You're saying if I was some

swaggering macho man...

in baggy jeans I'd

never be attacked.

Well, yes.

I mean, you're saying

that I'm asking for it,

because I swish and wear heals.

You're never going to change

the world by thinking like that.

What the f*** are

you talking about?

Change the world?

Take off that wig. I can't

even take you seriously.

Why should I take it off, Nico?

Give me a break Luke.

What, do you feel the

same way as your clients?

Look, just chill out. You

remind me of my sister.

Wait. You have a sister?

Get over here. You still

got glitter everywhere.

Do not take it off. What am

I doing if I'm not sparkling?

You don't need glitter to sparkle.

Yeah, well you don't need to be

straight acting to be a man.

Touch.

That was a big mistake.

I thought it was fun.

Of course you did.

What is that supposed to mean?

The way you were all over

everyone. All touchy feely.

Oh come one. I was just

being a good hostess,

you know making

everyone feel welcome.

By grinding on them?

I didn't grind on anybody. I

probably overdid it a little...

to make up for your uptightness.

I was just trying to make

sure the party ran smoothly.

Oh yeah, by nagging

and running around...

telling everyone not

to touch anything.

Look it was your idea to have

the party here, not mine.

Maybe you should have taken

a little more responsibility.

Don't used that cloth on the

floor its for the kitchen.

Would you stop telling me what

to do all the God damn time?

Don't yell at me.

I'm not yelling ok. Just relax.

This party was for Marilyn -

And the important thing was

that she had a good time.

And you know what?

I think she did.

Yeah, I'm not so sure.

She was acting strange

the whole time.

And you know she

can't stand Luke.

God only knows why

you invited him.

Peter, stop.

Come here.

What?.

We love each other right?.

Of course we do.

Good, that's all that

matters. Let's not fight ok?

Hi, I'm Carol and I'm an alcoholic.

Hi Carol.

I'm also a sex and a love addict,

'cause I... I really want to find love.

I'm also in cocaine

addicts anonymous,

'cause I love cocaine.

Have you seen Trisha recently?

No, but I hear she's

been going to the...

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