Lust for Love

---

1

Tell a story

of a life together

every house an allegory

like the smell of smoke,

it lingers on

Astor?

- Hi.

- Hey.

You wanted to, um,

talk about Mila.

We broke up yesterday.

You were dating her?

Um... I want you

to help me get her back.

Oh, Mila and I

aren't friends anymore.

- That's okay.

- She hasn't changed at all.

Oh, well, you're probably

better off, then.

She was never interested

in people

for the right reasons, anyway.

Yeah.

Look, Mila wants a ladies man,

confident guy

who gets all the girls.

It's not you, is it?

I could learn.

Uh... You could teach me.

I just need techniques

that work.

4:
00?

3 past.

Would you like

to grab a coffee?

You had to ask the time

before you knew

you wanted to ask me out?

Asking the time was my in.

I couldn't hit on you

straight up.

- Well, you should've asked straight up.

- It shows confidence.

- Okay. Okay.

- Let's go again.

Hey, what's up, girl?

Want to roll with me,

get some coffee?

Yeah, I want to roll with you,

right off my feet off the

sidewalk and into the gutter.

- Let's do it.

- Ain't happening.

You're putting on a persona.

Are you an actor?

- No.

- Then why are you acting up now?

Hold the bus.

12:
00. May not be possible.

10:
00, 11:00,

stop thinking with your cock.

What are you hesitating for?

Go.

- I can't run after her.

- That's desperate.

You said never look desperate.

You know the deal. Go now.

- Ah... Excuse me.

- Excuse me.

Um, sorry, uh,

can I ask you a question?

Sure, spit it out.

- Oh, that's charming.

- Prince charming.

- Well, what's the question?

- Can I buy you a coffee?

Uh, how long is this question

you have to ask me

over a cup of coffee?

That's the question.

I don't even know you.

I thought you were,

I don't know,

doing some environmental survey

or something.

No, I'm just a boy

asking a girl for a coffee.

- See that machine in there...

- Coffee is only $1.

Yeah. Go get high.

- Congratulations.

- Your first win.

If I was begging.

Asking a random cutie

straight up at this stage

was guaranteed

to get you knocked back.

- That was the plan.

- An evil plan.

To get you used to

being knocked back.

Didn't hurt much, did it?

Hurt like a paper cut

on my eyelid.

No pain, no game.

So you're saying I got game?

You're playing the game.

You haven't got game.

- But I be a player, yo.

- All in good time.

Right now, you pay to play.

You got the money?

I have to pay you?

No, I was just being silly,

but seriously, can I borrow $20?

Here you are, sir.

- Hey, you idiot.

- What?

- Oh! Oh! I-I-I-I...

- What is this?

What am I supposed to

do with this?

- I-I-I-I'm sorry.

- I didn't know.

I didn't... you should... but

buy your... buy another soda.

Buy yourself a soda.

Okay.

- Sorry, is my son bothering you?

- Come on, Astor.

- Idiot.

- Very sorry.

So, how did you and Mila

get together?

Well, let me tell you about it.

Must've been the mixing drinks.

Sambuca and bloody Marys don't

really go well to-together.

- Just one more cabernet.

- Well...

- Wee.

- Oh.

When they fight, they fight

Oh!

And when they come home

Oh.

- Happy Birthday, Astor.

- Your birthday cake.

- Thanks, mom.

- Cherry, like you like it.

Maybe tomorrow.

I'm sorry.

All right.

Okay.

Was it too much too soon?

Was it little too late?

He got the message she left

on his car in the rain

and then the words

that come to you

Oh.

- Astor.

- Hi.

Hi. Hi.

You just can't let it go

You're a little drunk.

Oh.

Okay.

I'm just a little tipsy.

Okay. Okay.

There's no clocks.

Uh-oh.

Okay. Sorry.

- Okay.

- That's my boob.

Yeah.

You all right?

You love me.

You're the best.

No one loves me

like you love me.

I love you, too, Mila.

Mm.

Cold.

It's cold in your house.

I just puked in my mouth.

I told you to go easy.

It's not the liquor.

It's your sob childhood

sweetheart tale.

More than half the world

is female,

and you hold out

for someone you liked as a kid.

It's kind of pedophilic.

True love lasts the ages.

True love involves sex,

not abstinence.

You skipped teenage sex

because your 4-year-old self

had a crush?

I was a late developer. Highest

vocal range in the church choir.

Oh, so pedophilia came

naturally to you, then.

She was worth the wait.

Sip.

Rinse.

Spit.

Smile.

Kiss.

21 years and 43 days

since our last kiss.

Wow.

I think I remember.

It was behind the toilets,

right?

Did we just kiss?

- We were 4 years old.

- Right, so probably just kissed.

That'd be weird.

Who do you think's gonna be

happier... your mom or mine?

Probably yours.

Yeah, you're probably right.

She knows

you're everything I ever wanted.

Blind confessions of love

ain't gonna cut it

with a girl like Mila.

If you're too sweet,

you'll turn most girls off.

You need attitude, edge, and

a hell of a lot more confidence.

You paying attention?

- I'm taking notes.

- No, stop.

You've got to let it flow,

not produce a paper on it.

When you're a player,

you'll know.

The girls will know,

and everything will be easy,

like shooting fish in a barrel.

Hi.

One for every day

we've been together.

Just like Monday.

- How's your paper going?

- Good.

So unfair you get all this work

right when we've

become a couple.

Yeah. I know.

I can't really stay out that

late either tonight. Sorry.

- I've got some good news.

- I started studying cardiology.

I'm not gonna get a degree

like you,

but I thought perhaps

I could help you study.

That's really... that's sweet.

I've got another surprise, too.

But I'll tell you...

I'll tell you about it.

I've always been here

beside you.

Your beauty weakens my knees.

You never knew.

How could you?

Each glance and every word

a tease.

I couldn't believe it

when I had you.

I never thought

I'd break through.

I could only barely

hold back the tears

from my... Deep and frightful

fears.

This bond is new.

Though it'll go on

after we've turned to dust,

our children

will one day remind you

of this beautiful

love and trust.

Yeah!

Ooh. You first.

Yeah!

Oh. Okay. Okay.

Oh, you're so scared.

No, I'm fine.

I just... okay.

You can have it

if you want it

Ow!

Ooh, hey, that's my nipple.

Oh.

Did I do that?

Yeah. When we were 12.

That's the cigarette burn?

- Yeah.

- That's crazy.

Your dad caught you smoking,

and you panicked

and put it out on my chest.

You got punished.

I still can't cook

with a wooden spoon.

Should I turn off the lights?

Yeah, I'm sobering up anyway.

Oh.

It's everything

you dreamed of

what you want

- Yeah.

- All right.

Okay.

Just don't blow it

everything's going down

Oh.

I'm surprised

you didn't get lost in the dark.

I think I might be a natural

in the bedroom.

Let's wait and see when you've

slept with more than one girl.

She might've been faking.

- Do you fake?

- No.

If a guy's inadequate,

it helps him to know.

When I give a compliment,

I mean it. Comes from the heart.

Or the clitoris.

It's not clitoral stimulation

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