Mad Money Page #6

- Yes.

This one's yours, right?

Yeah, thank you.

Look, I really

owe you an apology.

You did what you

thought you had to.

No.

I'm not...like that.

And I know you

probably think that--

Maybe you got

the wrong message here.

I never said

I didn't want you.

I just didn't want you

like that.

Well, look,

maybe we could just...

start from scratch.

Aah!

Oh, my God!

Oh!

Sorry.

- Excuse us.

No, no, that's fine.

I'm actually very sorry.

We'll be out in a minute.

No, no, please,

take your time.

Are you kidding me?

Everything's great.

Yeah, we got federal crimes,

a house full of loot,

and now people having sex

in our closet.

I know.

Oh, come on, Bridget.

Are you really fine

with all this?

Well, actually, I'm sort of hoping

she'll finally lighten up a bit

and let us start spending

some of this money.

What?

I don't know.

Maybe I just wanted a job.

What?

Actually, I thought

I was losing her.

And all I could

think of doing

was try to make her

need me again.

All right, everyone,

listen up.

What you need

is a boyfriend.

Hold up.

- Excuse me?

What you need

is to not--

A rich one.

Someone who's

out of town a lot,

gets you gifts,

pays for your kids' tuition

at a fancy private school.

And what you need

is a job.

Hey, man,

I'm looking, all right?

Day trading, all right?

On-line.

If anybody asks, you're

into short-term futures.

If somebody

wants a tip

just tell them the market's

way too volatile.

Can you write that down?

Yes.

Barry,

your mom's gonna get

a big insurance settlement.

Huge.

Of course I will be doing

freelance corporate

consulting out of our house,

which we will have

to remodel.

Okay.

There you are.

We all have jobs

we need to do

or the appearance

thereof.

Isn't he just great?

Hot damn. We're finally

organized crime.

# I used to go out

to parties #

# And stand around #

It's kinda hard to think

of ourselves as bank robbers.

# To really get down #

# But my body #

# Yearned to be free #

# I went off on the floor #

# So somebody

could choose me #

# No more standing #

It got be kinda

like a job.

Hmm.

# Beside the wall #

# Now I got myself

together, baby #

Of course we had problems,

you know?

Like where to put it all.

# There's always a chance #

We had it down

to a science.

The perfect money machine.

# Move your body,

oh, baby #

# And dance all night #

# To the grooving #

# Feel all right #

Aw.

# Oh, yeah #

Money...

...can buy you...

happiness.

Don't let anybody

tell you different.

What is Marjorie

gonna say about that, huh?

Oh!

I am so happy for you!

Are you?

Everything is wonderful.

Thank you.

Bridget, the good stuff.

The good stuff,

thank you.

The good stuff!

You're so funny!

Hi, Bridget.

- Hi. Hello.

Hi. How are you?

Good to see you.

Oh, hi!

Oh, how are you?

Hey.

- Huh?

You having fun?

- Yeah.

You're not gonna believe this.

- What?

Tom Gaffney just

offered me a job.

Senior VP, head of

a division.

They're impressed by how well

I've been doing as a consultant.

Take it, Don.

You think?

- Yeah.

Is it weird wanting to sit in an

office all day when you don't have to?

You're a manager.

You need something to manage.

It's a pay cut.

We're gonna have to pretend

to be living on less.

Yeah, I know.

You know,

you could quit.

Seriously.

I mean, we could

survive

being upper middle class

for a while, right?

Honey, I don't know.

I hate cleaning toilets,

but the money is so good.

Well, think about it.

Do you know that guy?

No. Why?

I don't know.

Oh, my God!

Oh! This is

so exciting!

Oh, my God!

- Thank you.

Thanks.

- Ring, ring, ring!

Good for you guys.

Oh, that's great.

Yes, girl! Uh-huh!

Green-level

employees,

like this

young lady here,

are not allowed

in red-level areas.

Transitions to

red-badge areas

are modeled after Federal

maximum security prisons.

...red IDs to ascend

beyond the cameras.

It was that guy...

showing up.

The thing about

a perfect machine, though,

is you drop in

one loose screw...

Bam!

Oh! Jesus!

I just came from

the loading dock.

I was dropping off

a cart,

when all of

a sudden,

Glover comes

out of nowhere--

Aah!

- Aah!

Shh!

- Quiet!

Just be quiet.

Just be quiet.

Okay.

What did you mean,

"We're busted"?

This guy was looking

at me very strangely.

I take my feelings

seriously .

Okay, Jackie, but let's

try not to panic, okay?

Yeah, yeah. You said you

never saw him before, right?

You don't know why

he could be here.

It could be nothing.

It is not nothing.

All right, we're just going

to try and find out, all right?

Okay?

All right.

Okay.

Ah! Service employees who

need access to red-level areas

are given yellow

I.D. badges.

A yellow badge is only

allowed in secure areas

under red-level

supervision.

Yellow badge employees are

given a rigorous screening

in national

databanks

for criminal

and psychiatric history.

It turns out

they're all crazy.

That's a joke.

Whoa, whoa.

Aah!

Whoopsie!

Oh, I think we're all safe

in this room, don't you?

Uh-huh.

Let's go right. Moving on.

Step right this way.

So as you can see,

there is simply no

opportunity for theft,

which is why there's

never been a theft

of even a single note

at this facility

and there never will be.

Right.

Look,

these are not

white-collar people.

They would have to

physically steal the money,

which I just told you

is impossible.

You're talking about

women who...

change trash bags.

They push carts around,

drop paper in a hole

eight hours a day.

You got to admit it's

kind of impressive, though.

Impressive?

Yeah, I mean, these people

have managed to acquire

enormous sums of

unaccounted for cash,

and no one can

figure out how.

Isn't that odd? Are you

a little curious about that?

Yes. So what we need to

do is get the KCPD on them,

find out what

they're up to.

We have...for months.

You've been watching

them for months...

and nobody told me?

Yeah. We believe one of your

staff has been compromised.

We had to assume the entire

security squad was corrupt.

How the hell dare you come

in here slinging allegations

when you have nothing?

No evidence.

They could have gotten this

money any number of ways.

They--they could be involved

with drugs, computer crime?

Well, they could have gotten

it turning in cans for deposit,

but they work at a bank.

Actually, your bank.

You listen to me.

I run the tightest lockdown

this side of Fort Knox!

And until you can

prove otherwise,

you get your glorified

paper-pushing ass out of here

and let some real men

do their damn jobs!

You know, I hope for

your sake you're right,

and I hope this place is as airtight

as you seem to wanna believe it is,

and I hope that you're

not a part of a conspiracy

to steal from

the Federal Government,

because that

would be a crime

punishable to the fullest

extent of the law.

You will be

held accountable.

He's a Federal Bank

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