Made Of Honor
Wow...
Looking good...
Oh, yeah, nice to see you.
Hey...
That dress needs dry-cleaning.
- Here you go.
- Thank you kindly, Monica.
Monica, Monica?
Oh sh*t, Hillary!
Okay...
- Hi, Bill.
- Oh hey Snowwhite.
Where's 11B?
Bingo!
What did you say that thing was?
It's time for a little action.
Monica... It's Bill.
I've got some dictation
for you, Monica.
I've got a big secret
for you, Baby.
How did you get up here
so soon?
Monica.
Oh my eyes!.
I can't see!
Who let you in!?
What happened... Where's Monica?
What happened to Monica?
- How did you get in here?
- She told me where the key was.
- I can't see.
- Did she say it was ok to dry-hump her roommate?
She said, you would be in the
library cause you were a geek...
I am not a geek!.
God!
My God.
What was that, mace?
"Eternity", by Calvin Klein.
get into bed with from now on.
It would be a big adjustment
for you, wouldn't it?
God!
I do that every time.
I've invented a solution
for that. Seriously.
It is something that goes around the
coffee cup, so you don't burn your hand.
I'm gonna call it "The Coffee Collar".
Brilliant idea.
I know all about you.
I know you whole wrap.
- You do?
- Yeah. You're a senior...
who prays on freshmen. You've slept
with half my floor.
- Well, half your floor was female.
- What ever.
And you once met Bono,
which I suspect is total bullshit.
No, it's true.
He signed my CD.
It's upstairs in my room
with my...
"Coffee Collar",
if you wanna see it.
- Are you hitting on me?
- No. I'm going of your look.
- My look...
- Yeah, doggybull look.
- Are you calling me a dog?
- No, it's a theory I have.
- Oh, Casanova has a theory.
- Yeah. When a girl
is attracted to a guy, she has a look.
It's her tell, like poker.
It's the same look a dog gets,
right before you put down the bowl.
- You're offensive. And you're crazy.
- No, I'm honest.
policy.
Alright...
You want me to be honest with you?
- Sure.
- I'm majoring in fine art.
- Right.
- I'm studying the golden proportions
of the human face. And you're
nose is bent and
and it drips down at the bottom.
A feature that is excentuated
by the thinness of your upperlip.
And your eyes,
are too far apart,
but they have to be
to accominate that bent nose.
And I feel sorry for you,
that you have to validate yourself through
insatiable-meningless-ego-sport-sex,
with insecure girls like my roommate.
I... Would never have sex with
someone... Like you.
Hey come here!
That was amazing.
- What was?
- The honesty.
That was better than sex
without the... The crying.
- Actually it did feel pretty good.
- Yeah, no one's ever
been that honest with me before.
- It's called a friend.
I'm Tom, by the way.
- Hannah.
- Hannah? That's a palndrome.
Well, good night.
Good night.
- Your hands, Clammy...
- Well, I can see that you're knocked out.
Tom, is that you?
Can I see your Bono-autograph?
She's all yours, friend.
Monica, get some sleep.
What time is it?
I'm late.
What are you doing tonight?
I don't do "back to backs".
- Isn't that what we were doing last night?
- No, that was something different.
"Back to Backs" is seeing each other two
nights in a row. You know I don't do that.
- Couldn't you just break one of your stupid rules?
- No.
- For me.
- I'm sorry, but I don't break the rules.
I have a rule about that.
See you next week.
Thanks.
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
Can I get a grande drip,
and a decaff,
triple grande, non-fat,
extra hot, stirred milk como lafietta.
With whip cream,
extra caramel.
Fill that 70% of the way.
Thank you.
Here, let me put a "Coffee-
Collar" on that.
- Thank you.
- I hear that the guy that invented that
gets a dime for each one used.
- You're kidding.
I am not.
That could add up.
I think I picked up yours by accident.
Sorry about that.
- That's alright. Thank you.
- Any time.
Byebye.
Gloria.
Morning.
Good morning, Hannah.
Coffee, the way you like it.
Perfect timing. I just finished
working on his balls.
That's eh... Yeah!
So I made a reservation.
- So what rule is this?
- No "back to backs".
Isn't that the same as the
"no more than once a week"-rule?
No, the "no more than once a week"-rule
works monday to fridays.
So theoretically you could have a
sunday night and monday whithout breaking it.
Exactly, you got it.
Here we go.
Hey, good morning.
Can I get the steamed buns
the scallaped steamed ducklings
and the vegetarian and shrimp steamed...
- Thank you.
- For what?
You know how much I love the fried stuff.
You look after me.
Excelent.
So, what did you say?
- She was hurt, but you know...
- But you where honest, right?
What? I was.
I am. Always!
I know you are, but it's just shocking
to see how you use it as a shield.
Maybe I should lie.
Be more like Dennis Philips,
and say what ever it takes to get a woman into bed.
- No, do not be like Dennis Philips.
- He's so gross.
- He only hit on you once.
At my fathers funeral!
Okay, so he's not known
for his sensitivity.
Oh, God.
Anyways...
- What?
- Nothing.
I know that "nothing". It's not
nothing, it's something.
- "Anyway"...?
- Anyway we both know,
you don't need to lie to get a woman
into bed.
Gloria.
I don't wanna lose that.
Can I keep that? Thank you.
See there's another rule too.
The 24 hour-rule.
I can't call her for another
Cause then it appears
that I'm too desperate.
You know, Dan sent
me another letter?
Asking you to move to Canada
and marry him again?
- A slice of apple-crum pie?
- No, we did that last time.
- You guys broke up like a year ago.
- 19 months.
- You're counting?
- No! He is... It was in the letter.
Not feeling the cream cup today.
- Hannah, come on. You're losing it.
- I know, I know... Okay.
- Come on. You're disappointing.
- I got it, I got it...
- Yeah!
- Wait, I so have it...
You're so good!
What do you think of this?
Tom, I am not going to another
one of your fathers weddings.
Thank you.
Hannah? Please?
Take one of the girls you've
been rubbing up against.
"No weddings or family events".
That's right.
I forgot that rule.
- It gives the wrong impression.
- It does.
- Is this made with real alligator?
- Yes, baby-alligator.
- You should be ashamed of yourself.
- Look at you.
Hello there...
And who would you be?
I love you. Yes I do.
I love you.
You're so pretty. Yes you are.
You're beatiful. Yes you are. Your beatiful face...
I love you, love you, love you.
a human sometime.
What?
A human?
To say it to a human?.
You're sweet.
Love you.
Hannah, please.
Come to the wedding.
He gets married and I go. I go because
he's my father and I care deeply for the man.
And everybody knows he doesn't love
them, and they don't love him.
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"Made Of Honor" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 22 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/made_of_honor_13131>.
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