Magnolia Page #6

Jim inches towards the closet, flips it open real quick and

stands back, ready for something to jump out -- nothing.

MARCIE:

I told you there was no one in there!

Jim looks down the hall at Marcie who has physically dragged

the large couch handcuffed behind her;

JIM KURRING:

Marcie - Do not drag that couch any further!

JIM'S POV, CAMERA DOLLIES IN SLOWLY TOWARDS THE CLOSET.

He pushes some sheets aside and burries around to reveal:

A DEAD SKINNY WHITE MAN (50s) curled up in a ball on the

floor of the closet. He'd dead and he's been covered in dirty

laundry. He has a gag around his mouth.

HOLD on Jim for a moment, he panics a little and swings his REVOLVER

towards Marcie:

JIM KURRING:

What the hell is this Marcie?

MARCIE:

THAT'S NOT MINE.

Jim swings the aim of his gun back at the dead body.

CUT TO:

INT. EARL'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM - DAY

Earl in bed, pretty out of it, but once in a while a couple clear

moments. Phil sits next to the bed, paper and coffee nearby.

EARL:

...n'I dowanna do this...sit here,

I can see the things, y'know...it's gettin'

there that's the cocksucker...like...I see

that pen...I see it, I know it's there,

I reach out for it -- no --

He mimes the action, gets nowhere near the pen.

EARL:

...no...no goddamn use.

(beat)

I have a son, y'know?

PHIL:

You do?

EARL:

...ah...

PHIL:

Where is he?

EARL:

I don't know...I mean, he's around,

he's here, in town, y'know, but I

don't know...he's a tough one...very....

Do you have a girlfriend, Phil?

PHIL:

No.

EARL:

Get a girlfriend.

PHIL:

I'm trying.

EARL:

And do good things with her...share

the thing...all that bullshit is true,

y'know...find someone and hold on all

that...Where's Linda?

PHIL:

She went out. She said she went

out to run some errands. She'll be back.

EARL:

She's a good girl. She's a little

nuts, but she's a good girl I think.

She's a little daffy.

PHIL:

She loves you.

EARL:

...ah...maybe...yeah...she's a good one...

PHIL:

When was the last time you talked

to your son?

EARL:

....I dunn...o....maybe ten...five,

f***, f***....that's another thing

that goes --

PHIL:

-- memory?

EARL:

Time lines, y'know? I remember things

but not so -- right there -- y'know?

PHIL:

Yeah.

EARL:

"yeah." the f*** do you know?

PHIL:

I've seen it before.

EARL:

Other f***in' a**holes like me.

PHIL:

There's no a**hole like you.

EARL:

...cocksucker....

PHIL:

How come every word you say is either

"cocksucker," or "shitballs," or "f***?"

EARL:

Do me a personal favor --

PHIL:

Go f*** myself?

EARL:

You got it.

EARL gets hit with something and starts to MOAN a bit. Sharp

pain hitting him and he touches his hand to his face....

EARL:

...I can't hold onto this anymore...

PHIL:

I'll get you another pain pill.

Another morphine pill --

EARL:

...gimme that f***in' phone...

PHIL:

Who are you gonna call?

EARL:

I wanna see this...where is he,

do you know?

PHIL:

Who?

EARL:

Jack.

PHIL:

Is Jack your son?

Earl doesn't answer. He's drifting a bit more now.

PHIL:

You wanna call him on the phone?

We can call him, I can dial the

phone if you can remember the number --

EARL:

-- it's not him. it's not him.

He's the f***in' a**hole...Phil..c'mere...

Phil leans in closer to Earl.

EARL:

This is so boring...so goddamn...

and dying wish and all that, old

man on a bed...f***...wants one thing:

PHIL:

It's ok.

Earl hallucinates a bit, cries a little, tries to form the sentences;

EARL:

...find him on the...Frank. His name's

Frank Mackey --

PHIL:

Frank Mackey. That's your son?

EARL:

that'snotmy name...find Lily, gimmme that,

give it --

Earl tries to grab something near Phil's head that is not there.

He's hallucinating more now, falls asleep a bit, mumbling;

EARL:

ifyougimmethat....overonthe....f***....

I can't hold ontothis anymore...

He gives Phil make an imaginary object and falls asleep. BEAT.

Stay with Phil a moment as he turns his head, looking around the

house a moment, looks back to Earl.

CUT TO:

INT. BURBANK HOLIDAY INN/BANQUET ROOM - THAT MOMENT

FRANK steps into a CLOSE UP and holding a mic, says:

FRANK:

Respect the cock and tame the c*nt, boys.

REVERSE, THAT MOMENT. The crowd of fifty GUYS who are taking the

"Seduce and Destroy Seminar" that Frank is teaching today laugh and

play along;

Frank is on a slightly elevated stage. vBehind him a huge banner for,

"Seduce and Destroy," whose logo is a scared pussycat and a large wolf

with a big buldge in his fur. It reads: "No P*ssy Has Nine Lives".

FRANK:

And you did hear me right. Tame it.

Take it on, head first -- with your

skills at work and say, "No. You will

not control me. You will not take my

soul and you will not win this game."

'cause it is a game, guys, you wanna

think it's not -- go back to the schoolyard

and have a crush on Mary Jane -- respect

the cock -- you are embedding this thought:

I'm in charge. I'm the one who says yes,

no, now or here. Sh*t, man. Sad but true.

Sad But True. And you wanna know what?

It must be the way.

The thing about chicks and the thing

about this course that we're going

through today is how universal the whole

thing is. I mean: I wish I could sit here

and say that it's not -- because the reality?

If each chick had something new, something

really new that I'd never seen before?

F***in' hell:
I'd be in the money! Because

I'd have to create a hundred new cassettes,

a hundred new books, a hundred new seminars

and hundred new videos just to deal with each

and every situation a chick could create -

but that is just not the case. They are universal.

They are sheep. They are to be studied and

watched -- they have patterns that must be stopped,

interupted and resisted. I'd be makin' a f***in'

butt load if they were actually as much of

a challenge as they want you to think they are!

Reality:
They Are All The Same.

Each and every one of them. And once you learn

these methods:
You're Set. You Don't Have To Come Back.

That's it. In solid. Boom. Done. Over. Why?

Because all women are the same. Period.

End of discussion. Sorry. It's true. Sad But True.

And anyone who wants to say that these methods

we work by are "unfair?" Yes, they are.

Guilty as charged. And so's the world.

It's a harsh, hard unfair place, but it's not

gonna stop me from getting my fair shair of hair pie --

Period. Sorry. End of discussion.

CUT TO:

INT. HOLIDAY INN/LOBBY - THAT MOMENT

Sliding doors open in the lobby and a young woman GWENOVIER (30s)

enters, takes off her sunglasses and looks around.

There's a bunch of Posters and Signs for the "Seduce and Destroy

Seminar with Frank TJ Mackey," etc. Frank's two sidekicks: DOC (20s)

and CAPTAIN MUFFY (40s) approach;

CAPTAIN MUFFY:

You're Gwenovier?

GWENOVIER:

Yeah.

CAPTIAN MUFFY:

I'm Captain Muffy, I'm Frank's personal

assistant. This is Doc --

DOC:

Hello.

GWENOVIER:

Hello.

CAPTAIN MUFFY:

We can go right in here. He started

about thirty five minutes ago, but

it's all getting pumped up now --

CUT TO:

INT. HOLIDAY INN/BANQUET ROOM - THAT MOMENT

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes