Major Barbara Page #11

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"to breathe and wait...

"to hold a hand uplifted over fate?

And shall not Barbara be loved forever?"

Oh. Euripides mentions Barbara, does he?

It's a fair translation.

The word means "loveliness."

And may I ask, as Barbara's father, how

much a year she is to be loved forever on?

As Barbara's father, that's

more your affair than mine.

I can feed her by teaching

Greek. That's about all.

Do you consider it a good match for her?

Mr. Undershaft, I am in many ways

a weak, timid, ineffectual person...

and my health is far

from satisfactory...

but whenever I feel

I must have anything...

I get it sooner or later.

I feel that way about Barbara.

I don't like marriage. I

feel intensely afraid of it.

I don't know what I shall do with

Barbara or what she'll do with me...

but I feel that I, and

nobody else, must marry her.

Please regard that as settled.

Not that I wish to be arbitrary, but why should

I waste your time in discussing what's inevitable?

- You mean you'll stick at nothing?

- Precisely.

Professor Cusins, you're a young man...

after my own heart.

Mr. Undershaft, you are, as far as I'm able

to gather, a most infernal old rascal...

but you appeal very strongly

to my sense of ironic humor.

Good.

We shall get on well together.

Have you ever thought

about going into business?

My business?

Money and gunpowder?

Never.

Barbara's money will come from it.

Why not help to earn it? Have

you thought of that at all?

I, uh... I...

Look here, Machiavelli, I am

interested in thought reading...

and have, in fact, made

some experiments in it...

but I object to your trying it on me.

When my head is clear, I'll

tell you exactly what I think.

Just at present I'm in

a state of exaltation.

I don't know why.

Perhaps it's the

excitement of that meeting.

[Sighs]

Phew! The room is very hot.

Might we have a window

open for a moment?

- Certainly. James.

- Mmm?

- I should like a breath

of fresh air myself. - Sir?

Draw back those curtains and

open the window, will you?

- It's a very windy night, sir.

- So much the better.

It's only for a moment.

[Inhales] Ah, what a relief!

- Steady, Machiavelli, steady!

- Lend a hand, will you!

- Quick!

- Right, sir!

I am afraid he's here

for the night, sir.

Nobody down yet?

Mr. Stephen's down, milady,

and is having breakfast.

Miss Barbara's gone up, I suppose.

- No, milady, Miss Barbara is not up yet.

- Not up yet?

- Are you sure?

- Quite sure, milady.

Miss Barbara came in late last night

and said she was not to be called.

Not to be called? Was she quite well?

A little pale, milady,

and without her bonnet.

I hadn't much time to notice.

She went straight upstairs and left me to

settle with the policemen and the ambulance.

Policemen? Ambulance? There

must have been some accident.

Are you certain she wasn't hurt?

I can assure you she was

quite all right, milady.

Well.

What have you laid all

those extra places for?

You're expecting Mr. Cusins

and Mr. Lomax, milady.

The car's ordered for half past 10:00

to take the party to, uh... to, uh...

Well? To where?

To Mr. Undershaft's

place, I think, milady.

- To the factory, you mean?

- Well, yes, milady.

The factory pays your wages, Morrison.

Yes, milady. That is what factories

are for. We must put up with them.

- Bacon and eggs, milady, as usual?

- No, I'll have a sausage this morning.

Yes, milady.

Ah, breakfast! Oh,

good morning, Lady Brit!

- You're late, Charles. Where's Adolphus?

- I haven't the faintest idea.

Good morning, darling!

Morrison, we're starving!

- Ah, bacon and eggs.

- Sausages!

Sausages, good. No kidneys. Morrison?

- Kidneys, sir. - Ah, thank

heaven for the English breakfast.

You know, as I always say, the

one drawback about going abroad...

Charles Lomax, if you must drivel, drivel

like a grown-up man and not like a schoolboy.

Drivel is drivel, you

know, whatever a man's age.

- [Sarah Giggles]

- Good morning, everybody.

- [Charles] Good morning, Barbara.

- Morning!

Good heavens! Y-You've

chucked the uniform.

You mean that Barbara's changed

her dress, Charles. Why not say so?

Cholly means exactly what he says,

Mother. Please, let's drop the subject.

Oh, I... I'm awfully sorry, Barbara.

You'll get over it, you know.

Personally, I never shut

my eyes to the fact...

that there's a certain amount

of tosh about the Salvation Army.

- On the other hand...

- That's enough, Charles.

Speak of something suited

to your mental capacity.

Thank you for your sympathy, Cholly.

Now go and flirt with Sarah.

Darling.

Barbara, I wish you wouldn't

tell Cholly to do things.

- He always comes straight away

and does them. - Darling.

Good morning, Lady Brit.

- Good morning, Charley.

- Good morning.

- [Sarah] Morning!

- Good morning.

[Sizzling]

Just some water, please, Morrison...

with ice in it.

I say, old boy, did

you have a bad night?

No, I had a very good night.

In fact, one of the most

remarkable nights I ever passed.

- The meeting?

- No, after the meeting.

You ought to have gone to bed after

the meeting. What were you doing?

- Drinking.

- [Lady Brit Gasps]

- Adolphus!

- Dolly!

- I say!

- What were you drinking, may I ask?

A most devilish Russian

spirit. I believe it was vodka.

Are you joking, Dolly?

No. I've been making a night of it with the

nominal head of this household, that's all.

Andrew made you drunk?

No, he just provided the drink.

Tell you the truth, I've

never been quite drunk before.

I rather liked it last night.

I told you I was possessed.

Possessed? You're not sober

yet. Go home to bed at once.

I've never before ventured

to reproach you, Lady Brit...

but how could you marry

the prince of darkness?

It was much more excusable to marry

him than to get drunk with him.

That's a new accomplishment of

Andrew's, by the way. He usen't to drink.

He doesn't now, although he had an

admirable excuse for doing so last night.

You see, he'd just given away 50,000.

- Given away?

- Yes, to the Salvation Army.

And he insisted upon

remaining anonymous.

That was rather fine of the old boy, you know?

Most chaps would have wanted the advertisement.

He said all the

charitable institutions...

would be down on him like kites on

a battlefield if he gave his name.

That's Andrew all over. Never does a proper

thing without giving an improper reason for it.

He convinced me that I have all my life been

doing improper things for proper reasons.

Mr. Undershaft has just arrived.

He's in the drawing room, milady.

Children, go and get ready. Your

father doesn't like to be kept waiting.

Adolphus.

Now that Barbara's left the Salvation

Army, you had better leave it too.

I will not have you playing

that drum in the streets.

Your order is already obeyed, Lady Brit.

Blah!

How fortunate to see you alone.

Don't be sentimental, Andrew.

Sit down.

Sarah must have 800 a year until

Charles comes into his property.

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