Major League II
- PG
- Year:
- 1994
- 105 min
- 1,871 Views
Hello, everybody!
Harry Doyle here
welcoming
all you Wahoo maniacs
to theyear's
As you know,
the Indians had
a Cinderella season last year.
Despite the fact
that toxic owner Rachel Phelps
wanted the team to lose
so she could move it to Florida,
the Indians won
for the first time
since divisional play began.
Rachel's gone now,
thank God,
having sold the team
to retired Indian third baseman
Roger Dorn,
after a long, hard-fought
series of negotiations.
I might be willing
to go as high as 100.
120? You just
started at 110.
Rachel,
this isn't fair.
We'll take it.
Oh, you're good, Dorn.
Even with Dorn
in the owner's box,
the Indians
are solid favorites
to repeat in the East
and go all the way
to the World Series.
And why not?
Look at the lineup
we have coming back.
First of all,
the Cuban Crusher,
the voodoo man
with the bad attitude,
Pedro Cerrano.
Even though his training methods
were a little unusual,
Pedro finished
in the top five
in homers, RBIs,
slugging percentage,
and total baldness.
Also back
is center fielder
Willie Mays Hayes,
who came out of nowhere
to lead the league
in great catches
and stolen bases.
We're told he starred in an action movie
during the off-season,
where he not only
did his own stunts,
but even his own acting,
and don't forget catcher
and team leader
Jake Taylor.
Despite chronic knee problems,
he had a fine season,
and beat out the bunt
that drove in the run
that won
the division title.
And finally, one of
in the game today-
Rick "Wild Thing" Vaughn.
Vaughn began the season
in the uniform
of the California Penal League
and had some control problems
early on.
But with the help
of a pair of black horn-rims,
he went on
for strikeouts
in one season
by an ex-car thief.
All in all, things couldn't be
looking better for the Tribe.
Guys! Guys!
We signed Jack Parkman!
- Parkman? - We signed
Parkman! - Alright!
- Hey, you can add 42 homers to our lineup.
- At least.
Guys, this is theyear
we go all the way.
All the way!
All the way! All the way!
All the way!
All the way! All the way!
Listen. Sounds like a Harley.
It's got to be him.
Wild thing
You make my heart sing
False alarm.
Whoa. Look at that.
Hi, gang.
How's it going?
Appreciate you all coming out.
Good to see you.
Yeah. Nice outfits.
Those haircuts are cute.
Benny, I thought
you were still in jail.
I escaped.
That-a-boy.
What do you say, big guy?
See you in the show
some day.
Cute? Say it ain't so, Rick.
Yeah, right.
Ahh.
Jake, how you doing?
Fine.
Good to see you again, Lou.
How's the leg?
Good. Good.
Feel like a kid
again, Skip.
Good. There's a rookie in camp
I'm gonna need your help
with for a couple of weeks. Baker!
Jake, this here
is Rube Baker.
I want you to help him
Alright.
Mr. Taylor, uh, ooh!
I- I knew you know
from which you speak.
I'm sure you can help me
with my problem,
which I'm bound to beat,
because there ain't no odds
against being yourself
no matterwhat
the percentages are.
Let me ask you
something, uh, Rube?
I bet you're wondering
how I get the nickname Rube.
No, I got a pretty good idea
how that happened.
What exactly
is your problem?
Well, uh...
Hell, that's the biggest
damn car I ever saw.
Everything I do
Got to be funky
Everything I do
People, now
Got to be funky
Honey, take a picture.
Say,Jake!
Hey, Willie!
If you ain't careful
You just might get
some funk on you
Who are they?
They are
our center fielder.
Oh.
What's up?
Hey, hey, Willie!
What's up?
Hey, welcome back.
Nice little do there.
What, you running
for office?
No, I'm just trying
to clean up my act.
Can't play the street punk
when you're making 7 figures, you know?
Who's that?
It's got to be Parkman,
our new free agent. Nice jacket.
Come on.
Let's check it out.
Say, Parkman,
I just wanted to say
that even though we're competing
for the same position,
I'm glad they signed you.
You're a good ball player.
Cut the crap, Taylor.
I don't like you.
You don't like me.
I just hope you don't blame
your bum knees when I take your job.
You want me
to bean him?
I'll just beat him out
for the job.
"Avoid spraying
toward open flame.
Contents under pressure.
Shake can before use. "
" Press-" What?
Jeez... I-I'm sorry,
Mister... Cerrano.
I, uh, just...
You are forgiven.
I love you all!
Ha ha ha!
Ha ha ha!
Jake.
Lou.
My great and good friends.
How you doing?
You OK, Pedro?
OK?
I free and clear.
Did he say free and queer?
Clear.
Free of anger and hostility that
run Cerrano's life.
Meditation is key.
Five months under
Master Hawa Masasuri.
No more voodoo,
just much peace
and wideness of love.
At one with all.
Whoo! Get up there, baby.
It's beautiful, man.
Ohh...
Awoo!
Fore!
Whoopee.
Hey, Hayes,
what are you doing?
Going deep.
I buffed up this winter.
You needed to to wear
all that jewelry.
Just remember,
you're our lead-off man.
You're paid to get on base,
not try to hit home runs.
Keep the ball
on the ground.
That's enough
for the first day.
After five pitches?
Say, what was that last pitch
you threw me?
I call it
the Eliminator.
It's a combination
screwball/split finger.
You name
your pitches now?
Yeah. Sort of
a marketing thing,
You know,
like Nolan Ryan's Express.
I'm also working on
a forkball/slider combination.
Well, whatever happened
to the boring, old
96-mile-an-hour fastball?
The Terminator?
Whatever.
It'll be there
when I need it.
Jake, I don't want to become
one of these one-year phenoms
throwing nothing but gas.
I got to start thinking
in terms of a career, not just a season.
You workwith Rube
Now step and throw!
Put it down again.
He looks pretty
sharp to me.
What exactly
is his problem?
Doggone it!
Jeez, Louise!
Uh, Duke...
Rube...
what's going
through your head
just before you throw the ball back
to the pitcher?
I'm thinking,
"I don't want to screw this up. "
What are you thinking
when you throw a strike
to nail a runner
down at second base?
I'm not thinking nothing.
I just throw it.
You see what
I'm getting at?
You want the pitcher to pitch
from second base?
Aw...
Ifwe walk somebody,
this guy's going to
turn it into an inside-the-park
home run.
Yeah. Whoa.
What's this,
your first spring babe, Vaughn?
Who, her? No.
There she is.
Ooh-whee!
Suggie-dug it now.
Excuse me, gentlemen.
Hi, baby.
Hey, Flan, how are you?
- Good to see you.
- You, too.
Good news. The General Cereals
people are interested...
The money's gone
to his head.
Yeah.
Let's go take a ride
in my limo.
There it is, man.
Watch this.
Hey.
Unh!
Aah!
Willie Mays Hayes is...
Ha ha ha!
Jesse "The Body" Ventura
is...
Together,
they're taking on the mob.
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"Major League II" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 5 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/major_league_ii_13201>.
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