Man of the Moment Page #5

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- Come on.

- All right, then.

I nearly forgot. I brought you these.

How nice of you!

They're flowers.

Well, put them down and come along in.

(Parrot) Not there, you fool!

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear.

Where am I gonna put 'em, then?

Oh...

Norman...

come here.

Come and sit down next to me.

Not there. Here.

Closer.

- Closer.

- More?

There we are.

(Giddy gurgling)

What is the matter? Don't you like me?

- Oh, yeah. Smashing.

- Well, then?

Oh! Ah!

Norman? My cigarettes.

They are in my bedroom.

Would you get them for me?

Straightaway.

(Gunshot)

(Gunshot)

(Pop!)

Please help me, Norman! There you are.

Oh, Norman,

do please come and sit down.

Do you want a cigarette?

- I never use them.

- Nonsense.

Here you are. Puff.

Ah!

Give us a hand.

Hey!

Oh, come here. Give it to me.

And give me that.

- Huh?

- Oh...

Oh, Norman, would you do me

another favour?

Would you get my slippers?

They're beside the mirror.

- Yeah.

- Go on, now.

Hey! Hey!

- You dirty, rotten crooks!

- Go on, you fools!

How did I fall in love with you?

Fancy you mixed up with this lot.

Now, keep away! Help!

Help! I'm being attacked! Hey!

Help! Hello? Help! Fire!

- He's on the end!

- Do something! Use your knife!

- Help! Ah! Hello!

- (Man) 'Hold on, please.'

I am holding on!

- Monsieur, what are you doing?

- I was on the phone and I got cut off.

Would you fasten your seatbelt, madam?

- Good heavens!

- Oh!

Well, I...

Gentlemen,

the Queen of Tawaki says no.

What?

(Translates in Russian)

(Translates into Chinese)

You mean, the decision must be left

to your government?

- No.

- Your queen?

- No.

- For heavens' sake, who is it left to?

Honourable Sir Norman.

He look after queen's wishes.

- Who's Honourable Sir Norman?

- Never heard of him.

Er...allow me.

Don't know him. Would you, er...

- You know this fellow?

- No.

- But you must know him.

- No.

Do you know him?

- Good gracious!

- What?

Norman!

You mean this man is the man

the Queen will listen to?

That is so. Honourable Sir Norman.

Are you telling me that this

little filing clerk has the Queen's ear?

- Yes, Sir Horace. But don't ask me how.

- Dash it, man, I do ask you!

- Are you sure it's the same Norman?

- Undoubtedly, Sir Horace.

Did you instruct him to take any part

in the negotiations?

Indeed I did not, sir.

Get him here! Get him here at once!

- I, er...

- Well, man? Well?

- I have a confession to make.

- Get on with it!

I fired him, sir. I sacked him.

You what?!

Now, where is it?

There.

Now, what are you going to say?

"Please, Sir Horace,

can I have my old job back?

- "Cos..." Oh, I can't!

- Hey.

Jump to it!

Put the international police on the job.

Send out a search party! And get Norman

what's-his-name, whatever the cost.

"Please, Sir Horace,

can I have me old job back?

"Cos Penny won't marry me

unless I do get it back

- "and she's the girl for me."

- Yes.

(Sir Horace, bellowing) Come in!

Good luck.

- Well? What do you want?

- That's him er...he, sir.

- Who?

- Honourable Norman. I mean, Norman.

My boy, how good to see you.

Come along this way, please.

- Here he is. Norman.

- Sir Horace...

My dear fellow. My dear Norman.

I'm delighted to see you. Delighted.

Now, then, Norman.

May I call you Norman?

- The cabinet will be told.

- Told what?

Oh, come now. No mock modesty.

- Mock who?

- Splendid work.

I'm delighted. An excellent move.

So the Queen of Tawaki

relies on you entirely, eh?

You could say we're pen pals.

Pals, eh? Ha, ha.

Yes, yes, of course.

Pals, eh? Well, my dear Norman.

The Ministry is pleased.

Very pleased, indeed.

In fact, we're giving a little party for you.

- A little soire.

- I'd sooner have a party, sir.

Of course.

A little diplomatic get-together, eh?

I think the government will want you

to complete your mission.

- Sir Horace, can I have me job back?

- Why, of course!

- Penny? Can she come to the party?

- His fiance.

- Delighted.

- Oh, good! Hey, Penny!

You can come in now! I've got it!

- Shall we look at some furniture first?

- Oh, yeah.

- Oh, can I help you?

- In a little while.

- We're just having a look round.

- Very good, sir.

(Music starts)

# I've got a dream for sale

# Will you buy a lovely dream for sale?

# Won't you try?

If you will close your eyes

# Maybe you can visualise

# I'll try to visualise

# A cottage by the shore... #

- Painted white?

- # With roses round the door

# Gay and bright

# A cosy fireside chair

# Big enough for two to share

# I like to think

I've made a good impression

# I love you, darling,

you're my one obsession

# Oh, a chance like this,

I can't afford to miss

# It's a fairy tale

with "vacant possession"

# If you would care to view

# Here's the key of paradise for two

# You and me

# If you will say you'll be mine

# I'll take down the sign

# That says I've got a dream for sale

# If you will say you'll be mine

# I'll take down the sign

# That says I've got a dream for sale #

Do you take me for a raving lunatic?

Sir, the Queen of Tawaki

is under the impression

she conducted her negotiations

with a titled diplomat -

Honourable Sir Norman.

- You mean I...

- I'm afraid so, sir.

You must recommend him

for a knighthood.

Oh, no!

- Well done, Sir Norman!

- Well done!

General, you know this guy Norman?

The one who has the inside track

with the Queen of Tawaki?

- The British have just decorated him.

- Trying to steal a march?

- What do you figure we should do?

- Well...

Anything the British can do, we can do.

Washington. Decorations Board.

(Speaking Chinese)

..present you with

the Brodnian Order of the Blue Dahlia

for courage and service to diplomacy.

You know Mr Jackson?

Jackson. Jackson, Jackson.

- Young man, if you don't behave...

- Name's Norman.

Sir Norman, Jackson.

Very well. To remind you, Sir Norman,

you are due at the television studios

for Town Topics.

We leave on the stroke of ten.

My dear Jackson, such efficiency.

You really are hot stuff. Isn't he?

Norman, I've just thought of something.

When we're married,

I shall be Lady Norman, won't I?

- You're a lady now.

- Thank you.

You know your instructions.

Concentrate on the girl.

If we get her, we've really got Norman.

Only need a fairy on me head

and I'll look like a Christmas tree.

- Good evening.

- They'll take a lot of living up to.

- Why?

- Norman, you haven't earned them yet.

- Then why did they give them to me?

- They all want part of Tawaki.

But I can't do them any favours.

I've got to look after the Queen.

I want to be loyal

but I can't let them mess about...

- Oh, no.

- Exactly.

Honourable Sir Norman's on the spot.

Then they can keep their medals.

I don't want them.

- I'll give them back now.

- No! No!

Ah, there you are. The car to take you

to the television studio is here.

- Hey, I want to talk to you.

- Later, Norman.

- Hello, Mac.

- Hello.

- What are you doing?

- Town Topics.

- Again?

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