Martian Child Page #2

of Castle Zeptar,

the earl's necromancers...

are bringing him back

to life against his will...

if that's possible.

Is that any good?

Sure.

Lighting!

Good morning! Your sword!

Move ahead!

David,

and, hello, earth to David.

A kid who sits

in a box all day...

is a giant red flag,

all right?

It's like the equivalent

of buying a used car...

and ignoring the oil spill

in the driveway.

You know, for a non-writer

you're becoming the queen...

- of the muscular analogy.

- Okay.

Listen, the thing about kids...

and I wouldn't trade

mine for the world...

is that they keep comin'

at you, all right?

They're...

They're like mosquitoes...

suckin' the life out of you.

They take away your life,

your privacy, your identity.

You should work

for Planned Parenthood.

You joke.

You forget that whole shelf-full

of books you wrote...

or your knowledge

of California wines...

or that you ever

ran a marathon.

All right,

here's the thing, Liz.

I never ran a marathon.

I don't want

to run a marathon.

I want to do something

meaningful, you know?

And I get all

the arguments against it.

I even get the one that says...

"I don't know if I want to bring

another kid into this world. "

But how do you argue

with the logic...

of loving one

that's already here?

Trans fobo medio.

Trans fobo medio.

Trans fobo medio.

- Dennis!

- Tran fobo medio.

Dennis, what are you doing?

- It's raining!

- I'm waiting for David.

What?

The man with UV protection.

Come in.

Get over here!

Ahem, anybody in there?

Brought you somethin'.

One, two, three, four...

Those really help

cut out the glare...

uh, one...

in your ongoing battle

with the sun.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

One...

Quality throw, chief.

Nice to see ya.

Very nice to see ya, actually.

He's not a puppy

in a window, you know?

I know.

All right,

catch it, catch it.

- Go for it.

- Okay.

You see, he's been abandoned,

emotionally abused...

he's classified

as "hard to place. "

He's... He's never

had a family of his own.

I know, but am I

the right person for him?

I mean, I'm just a writer.

He's seen a lot of doctors,

if that's what you mean.

That's not what he needs.

Oh, you!

At least tell me

what you're thinkin'.

I'm thinking I must be

out of my mind.

I see you remembered

your sunscreen.

You know, it works just as good

if you don't put so much on.

Is that your weight belt?

Earth's gravity is weak.

Mars is constantly

pulling me back.

So without all that stuff...

you think

you'd just float away?

Uh-huh.

That ever happen before?

Yes.

When?

With another

mommy and daddy.

Sophie, someone

- stole my ice cream!

- Hey! Wait up!

Uh, uncommunicative...

a tendency to steal things...

inability to form

personal attachments...

or distinguish

between right and wrong...

and he thinks...

He thinks

he's from outer space.

Not to put too sharp

a point on it...

but I think he thinks

he's from Mars.

How do you plan to deal

with that, Mr. Gordon?

Fantasy is my business.

It's... It's what

I do for a living.

And one of the things

I've learned about fantasy...

uh... in my own life...

is that it can be

a survival technique...

you know, kind

of a coping mechanism...

a way to deal with problems

that are bigger than you...

bigger than you're...

you're capable

of dealing with.

Uh, so, uh, you know...

the... the... the short answer is,

um, you know...

try to find that balance

between socializing him...

and letting him be who he is.

So, um, you know...

um, so, you know,

on the one hand...

uh, help him out

as much as I can...

and on the other hand,

uh, if he wants to...

If this little guy

wants to believe...

he's from another planet...

you know, I mean,

who am I to argue?

This isn't science fiction.

This isn't a short story.

Very often, with our children...

we don't get to have

a second draft.

Yeah.

A single man raising

a child with problems...

that are not common,

that are not easy...

you're gonna need

all kinds of help.

You'd need to include us...

- Mm-hmm.

- Include me.

Does anybody have anything?

No.

We're gonna take some time

and think about this.

Thank you, Mr. Gordon.

We'll let you know.

Hello.

Hey, man, what's up?

How's things on the planet?

Go away.

What?

Hello.

Hey.

Liz, I can't talk right now.

I'm waitin' for the call.

But you have call waiting.

But I don't trust it.

Your uncle is nuts.

Hello.

Really?

Yes!

Thanks for comin'

out here with me today.

It's pretty.

I thought you'd like it.

It's cool.

I like the holding-down belt.

You can wear

the holding-down belt...

all day long if you like.

Listen, Dennis, Mr. Lefkowitz...

said you can come live

in my house if you want.

It'll only be temporary

at first...

but if you like it,

you could stay.

I eat Lucky Charms.

I am a big believer

in a substantial breakfast.

Get your suitcase for you.

I got it.

Okay.

Go ahead.

You can cut through here.

Oh, right over here.

Yeah, yeah.

This way, young squire.

Hey, Somewhere!

Hey, Somewhere,

Somewhere, down, boy.

Down, boy. Hey, sorry.

That's just Somewhere.

It's just his way

of saying hello.

We don't have those

where I come from.

You're not a dog person, huh?

I'm just waiting

for the boys to get home.

Well, what is he doing now?

He's just...

He's just in his room.

Should I give him

some space or go in there?

I'll call you back.

I'll call you back.

This is kind of an a...

of an interesting thing.

It's a special night light.

But as you can see, it has

pictures of the planets...

and the solar systems...

and, you see, they

kind of spin around.

It's got mirrors.

And lights on the bottom

and pictures.

That's not right.

Yeah?

Well, what do you mean?

You'll have to

make the ceiling bigger...

and you'll have to make

your planet like this.

You're...

You're absolutely right.

For the...

For it to be accurate...

the ceiling would have to be,

I don't know, 100 feet long...

and the earth

would be the size of a pea.

Very, very good.

How do you know

that much about scale?

It took a very long time

to get here.

A very, very, very

long time to get here.

You can get rid of some of

those old clothes if you want.

Or we can keep that old stuff...

till it literally disintegrates

and falls off your body.

That's a good way to go, too.

That's kinda cool.

I used to be good

at video games.

It's not a game.

It's not?

Whatever it is, it's cool.

Should I close the door...

or should I just leave it

open or halfway?

Leave it open?

Mid-way?

Just think of it

as a bigger box.

All right, Dennis, I think

you're gonna enjoy this.

But, listen, before we eat,

rules of the house...

first rule,

no girls after 10 P.M.

Just kidding on that one.

Uh... the first rule

is that there...

There really aren't

any rules, you know?

Just maybe

some basic stuff about...

Oh!

Better put a sticker

there, I guess.

Listen, maybe we can,

uh, have a...

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