Meet the Blacks Page #7

I appreciate it.

I been drinking my water...

eating cantaloupes,

watermelons.

Realgood,

like a scoop of...

- What the f*** is that?

- ...chocolate ice cream.

You know chocolate's

my favorite, man.

Well, I'm mocha brown.

Damn, I heard you just got out too, man.

You look good.

They said you was just rollin' around

the neighborhood, man...

and decided

you want to stop in my kitchen.

- Yeah, to your kitchen.

- Yeah.

Looks pretty good,

marble tables--

- Since we old friends, I need to know...

- Oh, sh*t.

How much a place

like this costs.

Man, you know this ain't really,

like, a real mansion.

- Really?

- Yeah.

Whatever you paid,

it had to be steep.

I got some

financial backers, man.

Financial backers?

Maybe like Bank Key Flo.

Remember that?

You forgot about

how you left Chicago?

With a whole lot of money

and a whole lot of drugs...

that didn't belong to you.

I'm not even gonna bring up

the sh*t you stole...

- besides that, you know.

- What did I take?

- A space heater.

- I didn't take no damn space heater.

Nigga, you took

my space heater, nigga!

That's right.

You took my toilet seat

with the dollar bills on it.

- A toilet seat?

- You know what the f*** I'm talking about!

I don't even like toilet seats!

That's one thing about me.

Guess what?

You gonna get my money

and my dope back.

Tonight.

Why are you so angry?

Nigga, you don't need

to worry about all that.

- You know what you need to worry about?

- What?

Is that tonight,

I can kill you for free.

- For free?

- For free.

Won't go back to jail.

You'll just be smoked, nigga.

Off the count.

You know what I'm saying?

You're gonna give me

all my sh*t back... tonight.

How did you get out here,

on Southwest?

I know you's

a funny nigga and all that...

but I ain't in the mood

for no jokes right now.

I know it, and I'm trying to make sure

that me and you don't fall out.

I'm gonna give you

your money back.

I got some Mexicans

that's gonna come in town.

They bringing a hundred

of them things in here.

- I'm their connect.

- Who's your connect, nigga?

I will cut your f***ing

goatee off, nigga!

- Please, don't.

- This not a f***ing game.

This is real.

This is real, nigga.

You gonna give me

all of mine tonight.

And if you don't give me mine...

I'ma have to add some more colors

to my flashy track suit.

Yeah, maybe some red

or some brown.

Whoever let you walk out the house

with that jacket is not your friend.

Nigga! This ain't the time

for your goddamn--

I want my money

and my dope, nigga.

Tonight.

You wrong, man,

'cause you got busted.

When the police came

looking for you, you left...

and that's

when I took the stuff.

The police was gonna

get it anyway.

- Hey, baby.

- Carl, you lied to me.

Baby, not right now.

Come on.

You have this man

in here with a gun...

about to purge us,

and you're lying?

No, I didn't, I didn't--

Look, I can't explain it

to you right now...

but I'll explain it

to you later, all right?

Can't catch a break tonight,

can you, Carl?

- Daddy, help me!

- I think that's Allie.

That's my daughter right there, man,

they gonna purge me!

I'm purging you, nigga!

- There is no "they."

- Look, man, let me tell you something...

I don't know who the f***

you think I am...

- but I ain't gonna stand for this!

- Sh*t!

B*tch-ass.

Key Flo?

Key Flo? Key Flo?

Key Flo, you cool?

Key Flo?

B*tch, you thought

I was gone?

Duck, duck, goose,

motherf***er.

Carl Black,

bring your b*tch-ass out here.

You are light-skinned.

All light-skinned niggas are b*tches.

You can't hide!

Lady on my chain,

please don't let them--

Daddy, they purgin' us!

Daddy.

You freakin' republican!

Please!

Please don't hurt me!

Please!

- Who are you?

- You missed.

- Who are you?

- B*tch.

- What do you want?

- Cut it out.

Dennis Strahan.

But you might know me

by another name...

Visa.

- Visa?

- That's right.

And I'm here for Carl Black.

Your deadbeat dad has multiple

cards under multiple names...

buying iPads he can't afford.

I see the Louboutin receipts!

Well, can't he just

take out a loan, or layaway--

Too late for that.

The bigwigs decided.

I'm here to take the Black family

off the books.

Tonight!

- Where is he?

- I don't know!

- Yes, you do, little girl.

- No, I don't!

And I'm gonna find him!

Your account

is canceled, b*tch!

Surprise!

Shut up!

Don't you call my girl a b*tch!

F*** you!

You people are all the same.

You want

the best brand names...

but do you want to work for it?

No!

Well, guess what?

We're the credit card company...

and we own your ass!

Get off of her.

Get off of her!

Is he dead?

I think we killed him.

Take that, motherf***er!

Yeah!

Piece of sh*t!

Come out, come out,

wherever you are.

Come to papa.

I'm coming for you,

storm troopers.

Carl, stop playing that.

They purgin', bro.

Are you okay?

No!

I thought you said we were safe

in Beverly Hills.

Your father told me

the same thing, okay?

Okay.

Allie, did you hear that?

- Daddy!

- F***! What y'all doing over here?

You lied to us.

Look, we're gonna talk

about that later, all right?

- When?

- Don't start that sh*t right now.

- I can't stand you.

- Stop it!

Listen, if anything

happens to me...

- I love y'all.

- Stop that sh*t right now.

You can't hide forever!

- Look, they purgin', all right?

- She killed somebody.

- I did!

- I killed a motherf***er, too!

Listen, where's Carl's Jr?

- We don't know, he's hiding.

- Go find him, Carl.

Oh, man,

that's my only son.

- Please get us out of here.

- Isn't this more fun than our anniversary?

- We've gotta go find Carl.

- Let's go. Come on.

- Carl, be careful.

- Come out to play, Webster.

- I ain't f***in' scared.

- What you ta/kinabouz', Willis?

- I'm scared.

- I'm the man of the f***in' house.

If the tall one looks like

O.J., I'm gettin' him!

I don't wanna die.

- I love you.

- Don't hold my f***in' arm so tight.

I'm sorry!

- Carl.

- Go kill it.

Okay, come on, come on.

/'ma blow that do-rag

right off 50 Cent.

Slow down, Carl.

See anything?

- What's wrong, son?

- Come here, Carl.

Carl's Jr, come here.

Boy, get your ass over here.

Goddamn!

What the f***?

Tonight is the Purge,

Carl Black.

Wait, where--

Where I know you from?

Carl Black, you know me.

You better let my son go!

Not tonight, Carl.

Not tonight.

You have to pay your debt tonight.

- Where do I know you from?

- Got a real short memory, Carl.

- Where do I know you from?

- Sh*t.

I'm James Clown...

from Clowny Bouncing House

and Party Rentals.

- You know me.

- Oh, yeah, I remember you.

You were

at my 10th birthday party.

- That was a really good one, right?

- Yeah!

I really enjoyed that one, too.

They don't give parties like that anymore.

But still!

Nigga, you talkin' about

the jumpy houses?

Yeah, I'm talkin' about the jumpy houses

that you rented and never paid me...

and had me there all day.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes