Michael

- 'Night.

- Good night.

Right here is fine.

Think this is bleak enough?

My ears are frozen, my feet are frozen,

this is as far as it goes.

Malt won't like this.

- What's he not going to like?

- He'll find something.

Besides us, you mean?

Yes.

Huey...

You sit in the sled.

Santa, Sparky...

...presents...

...reindeer...

...fake snow.

- What are we missing?

- Children.

Let them out.

Let them out.

What do I do?

You know what to do.

When they handed out the parts,

you got the heart.

Right. I got the heart.

You mean you got the brains?

I mean between the two of us,

you got the heart.

Together we make a person.

What is this, Craddock, a joke?

- Who was in charge here?

- Me.

- I was.

- Right. This was Quinlan's baby.

Quinlan...

Let me ask you a question.

You was a big-shot investigative

reporter for the Chicago Tribune.

Won some prizes.

Give him a biscuit.

What do these look like to you?

They're Indians dressed up as Eskimos.

Indians, Eskimos,

what's the difference?

- That's what we thought.

- Shut up.

That's cool.

Do you know the only prize I ever got?

It's there, on the walls.

I got four and a half

million people who buy...

...the National Mirror every week.

Do you know how many...

...of those 4.5 million readers...

...are Indians or Eskimos

or Eskimo-Indians?

- I told him. American children.

- Americans...

...want to see pictures of Americans.

- They are Americans.

- Americans.

- Is that too much to ask for Christmas?

- No, sir...

...and I'll get someone right on it.

My little poochie, look at you.

If you don't teach that dog...

...some manners soon,

somebody else will have to.

How long were you

Elizabeth Taylor's pool man?

Reincarnation, Miss Hucklow speaking.

Were you on the bed when it levitated?

He lives in your refrigerator?

Can I put you on hold for a second?

I'll go to my desk and take this call.

No, don't let him out. Okay, hold on.

Here's something interesting.

Malt sent you for the tree this year.

I forgot.

I found it in Montana.

As soon as I see it, I know

it's too big to fit on the truck...

...but then I think, what if someone

sees it while I try to find one...

...that'll fit on the truck?

Then Malt gets...

...the second biggest Christmas

tree in the U.S. and I'm screwed.

Yeah, well, that's good thinking.

- So I cut the top off.

- You did that?

I didn't know it'd be

a major problem...

...to put the top part of

a tree back on the bottom.

He will never fire you.

Look at the walls.

Look. Look at the walls.

He's got millions of dollars

tied up in that dog...

...and the dog belongs to you.

Hold on to that dog, Huey.

What?!

Driscoll!

Driscoll, come in here.

We are going to get it, Sparky.

"Dear Mr. Quinlan,

I'm a great admirer...

"... of your prose and can tell

you have a sensitive nature.

"I have had an angel...

"... named...

"... Michael...

"... living with me for almost six

months now. He's extremely polite.

"I have enclosed a photograph to prove

to you that I have not lost my wits.

"I know that you and Sparky

travel all over for your stories.

"That one about the coconut

with the wedding ring inside...

"... was very, very nice.

"And I think you should visit Iowa...

"... and see us...

"... for yourself.

"Sincerely, Pansy Milbank. "

Did your mother drop you?

What was going on in that pea brain...

...that let you take this superb

creation of the Lord Almighty...

...and chop it in half?

Whatever I pay you, it's too much.

How much does Fred make?

The janitor? I cannot

survive on a janitor's salary.

- Help me?

- Kill the dog.

Were you invited?

- Let him go on the highway.

- Wait a minute.

What kind of person are you?

Who is this?

Dorothy Winters. She works here.

I do? I got the job?

- You won't regret this, Mr. Malt.

- Do you know what that is?

That...

...is an angel.

That is a genuine angel.

Huey...

...discovered it.

- Is it for real?

- Absolutely.

You'll get me this angel?

That's exactly what we'll do.

We'll put it on the front page, bold.

- Some white fluffy clouds.

- There you go.

- A drift of sky.

- You got it.

And some musical notes.

- Poetry.

- Don't play...

...with me, Quinlan.

You really are...

...going to go fetch me

this angel for Christmas...

...or...

...I fire the two of you...

...and I keep the dog.

Deal.

Need a conference with my colleague.

You cannot live on Fred's salary.

You cannot. That's a deal.

Don't you worry about a thing,

Mr. Malt.

- We'll leave tomorrow.

- Right.

We're taking...

...Sparky with us.

And Miss Winters.

They are?

- Why are we taking her?

- She's an expert.

In what?

Angels.

Miss Winters is an expert in angels.

I have something to tell you.

I won't take care of you anymore.

Your parents will find someone else...

Don't look at me like that.

I have this wonderful new job.

The only problem is, I must pretend

to be an angel expert for a few days.

It'll be fine.

I'll be fine.

And so will you.

Good dogs.

- You've had an encounter with an angel?

- No.

Yes.

Maybe.

- Have you ever met an angel?

- Once.

I got a flat tire on

a deserted country road.

There was no food, no water,

it was 108 degrees...

...and a man in a white robe

suddenly appeared on the horizon...

...with a spare and a jack.

Kidding.

I am.

Bradley used to tease.

Who's Bradley?

My ex-husband.

Better watch it, Quinlan.

We should start over.

When something's going wrong,

it's best to start over. I'll go first.

- Where did you get Sparky?

- Oh, no.

He came up to Huey in a parking lot.

Huey was eating a doughnut,

and was trying to kick him away...

You were trying to kick the dog?

I wasn't trying to kick him. I was

trying to shoo him away very gently.

...when...

...Malt comes out,

sees the dog and stops dead.

Seems Malt was once a child

who'd had a dog just like...

...Sparky.

That's so sweet.

Anyway...

...Malt's eyes get all teary...

...and he pours out this story,

about his dog Sparky...

...which ended up

underneath a tractor tire.

You know what Huey did?

Huey turns to Malt and says,

"Mr. Malt, that's amazing!

"This dog's named Sparky too. "

In no time at all, the dog is famous.

Has his own column,

saved Huey's neck 100 times.

Milk Bottle Motel. Here.

Milk Bottle Motel.

Looks like your angel checked out.

Somebody's here.

Mrs. Milbank?

I'm Frank Quinlan

from the National Mirror.

About your letter?

This is my associate,

Mr. Hugh Driscoll.

How are you?

And this is Dorothy Winters,

who is an expert in...

...various things.

And this is...

...Sparky.

You're just as handsome

as in the pictures.

I think he's cold.

- I wouldn't know why not.

- We better get him inside.

Sparky, here you are.

What's that wonderful smell?

You must be baking.

Well, it was nice of you to come.

Don't...

...shake me, Mr. Quinlan.

I'm contemplating my death.

Are you with the angel?

Do you see an angel?

I don't think I do.

Then how could I be with him?

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