Michael Moore in TrumpLand Page #4

only to find out that if

you vote to leave Europe

you actually have

to leave Europe.

(audience laughs)

And now they regret it.

All the Ohioans,

Pennsylvanians, Michiganders,

and Wisconsinites of

middle England, right?

They all voted to leave

and now they regret it

and over four million of

them have signed a petition

to have a do-over.

They want another election.

It ain't gonna happen

because you used the ballot

as an anger management tool.

And now you're f***ed.

And the rest of Europe,

the rest of Europe,

they're like, "Bye Felicia."

(audience laughs and claps)

So when the rightfully

angry people of Ohio,

and Michigan, and

Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin

find out after a few

months in office,

that President Trump

wasn't going to do

a damned thing for them,

it will be too late to

do anything about it.

But I get it.

You wanted to send a message.

You had righteous anger

and justifiable anger.

Well, message sent.

Goodnight America.

You've just elected the last

president of the United States.

(news station jingle)

- Good evening, Terri Hardesty

reporting from our

nation's capital.

Donald J.Trump

was sworn in today

as the 45th president

of the United States.

- [Donald] I, Donald J. Trump,

- As some had predicted,

the sh*t show started

within minutes.

Before the parade,

President Trump ordered

an aerial bombardment

of all Mexican border towns.

(explosions)

The instatement of stop

and frisk checkpoints

at all U.S. inner cities,

and the deportation of Rosie

O'Donnell to American Samoa,

to which Trump replied, "Hey,

it's not really a deportation,

we own the damn fat farm

for Christ's sakes."

The inaugural parade

finally got underway,

but only after President

Trump insisted on

flying over the parade route

in his Trump helicopter

once he learned that he was

expected to get out of his limo

and walk to the White House.

Upon arriving, the

president walked inside

the 200 year old structure,

took a brief look around,

and we have this exclusively,

a recording made by a White

House maid on her cell phone.

- In other news, by day's end,

20 million Americans who

say they voted for Trump

had signed an online petition,

asking for a do-over election.

Finally, this will

be our last broadcast

as the new Trump channel run by

Roger Ailes and Breitbart News,

will be taking over this network

and featuring all reality,

all day, every day.

Trump himself will be hosting

The Real World 1600

Pennsylvania Avenue

and You're Fired, America,

a nightly show where

your job may be next.

I'm Terri Hardesty signing

off, good luck America.

(audience applauds)

Just wanted you to see what

it's going to look like.

Um, so here's my question.

What is our problem

with Hillary?

What's your problem?

What is your problem

with Hillary?

You know, I got my problems.

I can, I'll tell you what

my problem is with her.

She voted for the Iraq war.

She's too cozy with Wall Street.

Those are big ones.

We don't really talk

about the issues, do we?

Whenever they talk

about Hillary,

when anyone talks about

Hillary it's about

how you like her

or don't like her.

And the people that

don't like her,

and that's on the right and

the left, don't like her.

But what is this about

her being likeable?

You're not going to the voting

booth to vote for a friend.

"I want her to be my friend."

No, I don't want

her to be my friend.

I want her to,

I want them not to like

her up on Capitol Hill.

I want the people

she's negotiating with

not to like her.

You don't want

somebody all likable.

"Sure, whatever you say."

"Okay, I'll sign here."

(audience laughs)

What else, what are the

other knocks on Hillary?

Not trustworthy, right?

We hear that a lot,

she's not trustworthy.

How did she prove her

distrust-worthiness to you?

Did she, did she promise

to water the plants

for you while you were

gone, and then didn't?

Now we're talking

about differences,

you say well she

flip-flops or whatever,

well everybody changes,

everybody evolves,

I hope they do, right?

We want our Trump voter

friends in here tonight,

we're asking them

to maybe change.

If you just stay in cement,

it's like okay so she's learned.

She was against, she

fought gay marriage

and then she was for it.

Well I'd rather that, than

staying against gay marriage.

I don't think

that's a bad thing.

She said her Iraq

War vote was wrong.

She's never done anything

more wrong than that.

Okay it's not exactly I'm sorry,

but that pretty, okay she's

a politician, I accept that.

What else, what else?

What are the other

knocks on Hillary?

Benghazi.

Okay Benghazi, yes.

She got up in the

middle of the night

and personally

planned, with ISIS

which she and Obama created,

according to Trump,

they invented ISIS,

and they planned this attack

to kill our people there at

the Consulate in Benghazi.

- [Audience Member] She

was cleared six times.

- Oh she's been cleared

of the charges six times.

That's not enough!

(audience laughs)

You have to be, if

you're Hillary Clinton

you have to be

cleared eight times.

- [Audience Member]

The Clinton Foundation.

- Oh the Clinton Foundation.

Well thank God there's

a Clinton Foundation,

look at all the

good they've done.

(audience cheers)

You know?

I mean,

and if what they say is true,

and so they get to have

a meeting with Hillary,

and what's their meeting,

she's still Hillary Clinton.

It's not like they get

to go in there and say

"I need you to bomb,

"I need you to,

"I need you to bomb Yemen."

"Okay, how much did you give

the Clinton Foundation?"

"I gave the Clinton Foundation

$50 million dollars."

"Call in the air strikes."

That's not what's going on.

Generally, what the

Obama administration

state department has

done, not everything,

has been good for the world.

The world likes us

a little bit better

than when George W. Bush was

in the White House, right?

(audience cheers and claps)

So.

But what else?

Remember I'm not a Hillary

voter, so what else, what else?

(audience shouts off-mic)

Huh?

- [Audience Member] She forgot

to tell us she was sick.

- Yes, that one.

- [Audience Member]

It was pneumonia.

- She wouldn't tell

us she had pneumonia.

And I want to say

something about that.

I just feel bad

that she didn't tell the

truth about her pneumonia.

And what I feel bad about

is not her being a liar,

but that she has got

to a point in her life

where she can't even trust us.

If she had just said

"I've got pneumonia and I've

got to take the weekend off."

What would the

response have been?

It would have been,

"It takes a village."

Right?

What she taught us.

She can't quite trust that

about the United

States of America.

That's a sad commentary on us.

That's not really on her.

Can't we start saying

something nice about her?

You know, even the Trump

people in here, you know?

Or conservative

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