Monster Family Page #3

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He travels everywhere with us.

This little one is part of the family.

Isn't that right, Buster?

Of course.

And why is Mr Wishbone two feet

taller than stated here?

Growth hormones. In the meat.

Don't you watch the news?

- And what's going on...

...with your daughter?

Acne. Puberty, you know.

Very severe case.

And what about you?

- Me? Oh, yes,

I've been performing in

"Dracula, the Musical" in London.

I thought I'd get into costume now

and save time.

Very impressive.

The dog will definitely have to travel...

...in the hold with the luggage.

Do you have a cage for it?

Mum, I don't want to

travel with the luggage.

Don't worry, Max.

I mean Buster.

That was me.

I'm a ventriloquist.

Hello there, madam,

I'm a dog. Give me a biscuit, please.

If you could just bear with me

for one second.

Security, we've got

a bit of a problem.

I can't look like this

for the rest of my life.

We have to get to London,

find the witch...

...so that she can make us

human again.

You have to let us on that plane.

You have to.

Hello?

No problem. And I'll upgrade you

to First Class.

Here you go, your tickets.

- Thank you.

Let's go, Frank.

Have a good flight.

Didn't I tell you that

everything would be fine?

I have no idea what just happened

- You can hypnotise people.

It's just like in. 'The Curse Of The Mummy'.

- Really?

Mummy,

I need a bigger allowance.

Don't even think about it,

young lady.

I would try that with dad.

Look, girls...

...that's what happens when

you over-exfoliate.

You are all big stupid monkeys.

And she has got a banana.

Fay!

Mum, if I have to look like this...

...at least let me have some fun.

Mocolate.

Chocolate for everyone!

Fay, stop this immediately.

Come on, Mum, this is much better

than an in-flight movie.

What's wrong?

- I'm just...

...I'm just so hungry.

So eat this.

- No.

How about tomato juice?

Okay. Who are you

and what's going on?

Does the name...

..."The Prince Of Darkness"...

...ring any bells?

I, well...

I am Dracula.

Dracula?

How did you get on this plane?

I could not wait to meet you,

my thorny rose.

And now, my dear,

to the matter in hand.

Well, in your hands,

actually.

Drinking the blood of humans

is such a messy affair...

...and considered quite common

these days.

Not to mention the matter of

disposing of the leftovers.

Leftovers?

- Come with me.

Come with you?

- To where you belong.

To my castle.

- But... but I, I...

I can't leave my

family behind.

Would you rather stay and drain these

people of their life-force...

...in order to quench your

insatiable thirst?

No.

I'll come with you.

- I hoped you might.

This place is not being Londra either.

Disappear, pronto!

Forgive the mask, I'm not overly

fond of the sun.

I know, how about

a parachute?

Parachutes

are for wimps.

Just out of interest,

where are we flying?

Towards our future together.

Call me pampered but...

...I like to travel in style.

Memma?

She was right here.

- Where's she gone?

Hey, give me that.

Come on. Jump.

You can do it if you try.

That's gonna be handy.

A little jest.

Only I can do that.

This is a bit sudden, don't you think?

Your lunch.

What on earth is this?

I want blood, not a pill.

Trust me, Emma.

- But how can I trust you? You're Dracula.

That's why only I know what you need.

Yes, it's an acquired taste.

It's working.

I'm changing back.

Why are you helping me?

You're the first person

in a thousand years...

...who has lifted my melancholy.

- That's so sad.

No, because you have

been worth the wait.

Finally there's someone who can

understand me and share my life.

Romantically.

A vampire wife.

Wait, did you send that

witch after us?

Witch? No, I don't know any witches.

Do they even really exist?

I want to get back

to my family.

Do they really make you happy?

Well... sometimes.

"Sometimes" is nowhere near enough

for you, my darling.

You deserve to be happy "always".

I will devote myself to...

...showing you a life beyond

your wildest dreams.

Our home would be

my castle.

But we will travel...

...to the most romantic places.

I will give you this world...

...and worlds beyond.

It could be wonderful.

Can your husband offer you anything

like that?

We did play Scrabble on a Tuesday night

last May for no particular reason.

Then what are you waiting for,

my love? Follow your heart to me.

Oh. I...

...I have to get back to my family.

You would choose

to be unhappy?

No. But when you're a mother,

you have to take the good with the bad.

Well if you're that sure,

don't let me keep you.

You could have just called me a cab!

If mum doesn't show up here...

- ...we might never see her again.

Emma will be fine, guys.

Relax.

Tai chi with me. I call this one...

'Chicken Flies Into The Soup'

Mum?

Memma.

Coming!

Mummy!

I really need to practise that.

You're back!

- We thought we'd never see you again.

I'm fine. It's okay.

Memma. Memma. Memma.

Gently, gently, gently.

So what's with the disappearing act?

Did you ever think of

calling your family?

Yes, we were really worried.

Where have you been?

It wasn't that easy.

Dracula has a way...

...of hypnotising you.

- Dracula, the vampire?

No, Dracula, the hair stylist.

So, is he handsome?

Like in the films?

Mammsome?

He's kind of looking for love.

Mmove?

Renfield!

Prepare Operation Ice Age.

If I can't have love,

then no-one can.

I will eliminate all

life on Earth.

Oh and tell Baba Yaga...

...I have something

particularly nasty planned for her...

...if she doesn't destroy

this 'happy family'...

...immediately!

This not Londra.

Hi.

Disappear, pronto!

Mig Men.

Big Ben.

Mig Men.

It's the witch.

Oculus wrong again.

- Get her!

This is Londra.

There's no way I'm jumping

in after her.

Of course not,

scaredy-cat.

Oh, could you please stop arguing

just for once.

Oh, no, not this

crazy magic again.

What is she doing?

Is she going to change us back?

It's about time.

Let's go.

Change us back

so we can fly home.

No, do I will not.

Fully charged, my amulet is.

Now finish my task,

I can.

So Baba Yaga free can be,

at last.

No.

Stay here,

you little piece of...

Enough, messed up my work,

you have.

By air, by sky.

Now you will fly...

...to Egypt!

Curse it again, all of them I've hit.

- No...,

...not all of them.

So who thinks the evil witch

just tricked us?

That would probably explain why

we're now in Egypt.

This is not a problem.

We are getting out of this desert and

finding that witch.

And how do you think

we should do that?

I haven't worked that out yet

but, come on...

...we're a family.

We can do anything.

Follow me! We're getting out

of this desert.

Bring back my friend.

- Never.

You run fast

for an old crone.

Disappear, pronto!

Not cool.

My amulet.

Got it!

Hold on.

Take my hand!

- Trust you, why should I?

Because I'm one of

the good guys.

Imprison me, Dracula did,

for a thousand years.

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