Morning Glory Page #5

- Yeah.

He was just mentioning that

he might be somewhere. I mean...

Come on, please, I think I would

know if I was being asked out on a date.

- It's a date.

- So, we've got the bird whisperer

- confirmed for Tuesday?

- Yes.

Great. And...

Al Green on the plaza Wednesday.

- Two songs.

- OK.

And Colleen, do you want to do

the interview between the songs?

No, let me.

Yeah, I'll do it.

OK. Mike, so we have this great story

on children's water safety.

- That's the...

- Not my thing.

OK, how about a rundown of the new

shows on the fall television season?

- Oh, yeah. That's a no.

- OK.

The boom in organic farming.

Very hot topic right now.

That's newsy, right?

What do you want me to do?

Fire another anchor?

Then we're gonna be stuck with

that guy who counts with his hooves.

Colleen can't do every story

that's not hard news.

It's Mike Pomeroy. He's a legend.

What am I supposed to tell him?

- There she is.

- What? Oh, hi.

Interesting, Jerry hired you.

No polish. No pedigree.

Those bangs.

What was he thinking?

Just wondering.

- He's a peach.

- Yeah.

Coming soon to Daybreak,

one of the most legendary newsmen

of all time.

Soon, he'll be bringing his

experience to morning television.

Let Mike Pomeroy show you the world

over your first cup of coffee!

- Oh, for Christ's sake.

- What? What, what, what is it now?

It's embarrassing. I mean,

what's in the briefcase?

- What do you mean? What?

- Special anchorman papers?

- It doesn't matter.

- My lunch? Where am I going?

- We've been over this eight times!

- I'm running to nowhere.

- I look like a jackass!

- No... Yes, you do.

You know, whoever gave you

promo approval was smoking crack!

- I want to meet that person.

- I was mopping the floor

- with Peter Jennings at the time.

- I want to have words with...

I could have had hookers and

eight balls written into my contract.

- How nice for you.

...over your first cup of coffee.

Why do we have to mention that first

cup of coffee? Why not just say,

"Watch Mike Pomeroy

before your morning dump?"

One of the most legendary newsmen...

So for the fashion segments, I think

it's important that we interpret

runway trends for our viewers because

they're not all six foot and size zero.

- Man, he's cute.

- I went to Yale with him.

- Shut up.

- You did not.

Everyone was madly in love with him.

Actually, just me and

every single person I knew.

- Can we just?

- His dad was editor of Newsweek.

His mom's family is rich as hell.

They own like Tupperware or something.

He rowed crew for Yale when they won

the national championship.

Hi.

- You know him?

- No. Yeah, well, yes, I mean, I...

- Yes.

- Don't you think he's smokin'?

- Smokin'.

- Yeah.

I don't know, I don't know.

Let me see. I don't know.

- Not a hard question.

- He's walking away.

So jeans and belts.

You have a rash or something

spreading on your neck.

Well, you know,

I asked him to do a piece on Trump.

And he actually picked up my Diet Coke

and hurled it across the room.

- Wow, he picked it up.

- Just missed me. He did.

I asked him to cover

a bumper crop of cranberries

and he slapped me in the face.

- He did?

- It's true.

- Really?

- Of course, he was drunk off his ass.

Adam!

- Hi.

- Hi. How are ya?

- I'm good.

- Hi.

- You never called me!

- I'm sorry.

We... I was...

I've been workin' a lot.

Well, maybe I'll see you at

Barton's regatta party on Saturday.

- Great, great.

- OK, great.

Yeah, cool.

- Sorry, I was just...

- That's OK.

Absolutely fine. That's fine, fine.

- Bye.

- See you later.

- Yeah.

- So, anyway,

the reason that I came by tonight,

was because I don't really know

that many people who know Mike,

and I thought, that, you know,

I could get your professional feedback.

- My feedback?

- Yeah, you know.

I mean, 'cause I'm actually

new in town and I don't...

- Come on.

- No, please.

...have that many work contacts, so...

Great. So... we'll be contacts?

That would be great.

Well, you can never

have enough of those.

No, you can't.

So, definitely be seeing you around.

- OK.

- OK.

Sh*t.

OK. Good rehearsal. Good stuff.

So let's just alternate the

voiceover intros of the headlines.

- OK.

- And then ad-lib.

So, let's say, for example, we're doing

a story about, I don't know,

- a midterm election.

- But we won't.

Because the morning shows

don't do news.

Pompous. That's really interesting.

That's a different color for you.

- That's...

- OK, and you two should just sort of,

you know, banter back and forth

a little bit.

Banter, from the Latin word,

meaning "to gibber like a moron?"

Just, you know,

talk about the headlines.

That's... that's what I mean.

I'm not gonna sit here and rehearse

like I'm in summer stock.

I've been on the air for 40 years,

for Christ's sake.

I think I know how to ad-lib.

The spill began

when the tanker was damaged

in heavy seas outside Galveston.

Knock, knock.

Can I come in?

I just wanted to say,

you know, good luck.

Colleen's Pap smear.

A television classic.

Are you drunk?

Insufficiently.

Current weather conditions

are complicating efforts

...to contain the...

- That's my chair.

What?

That's where I belong. There.

...authorities have asked

the federal government...

Took it away from me,

those motherfu...

I think maybe you should just go home...

- See this?

- Yes. What is that?

Forty-year-old Bruichladdich.

I only drink this

when I'm practically suicidal.

OK.

You're, you're very funny.

Well, I'm gonna see you tomorrow...

right?

...is almost impossible to calculate.

Hi.

- Hi.

- Hi.

Hi. I...

Sorry. I thought that I might

swing by to...

...see if...

What are you working on?

We're working on a piece

on the communist rebels

in the Philippines.

Good. That sounds great. So I went to

the bar the other night to see you.

Yeah, I could tell. By the way

you ran in the other direction.

Your arms, pinwheeling.

Yeah. OK, fair, true.

I think that you're sort of...

...comically great.

And I thought it seemed

so promising so I bungled it,

because that's what I do.

I bungle things.

I bungle and I ramble, and that's

kind of like what I'm doing right now,

talking about it.

You threw me off guard.

You, with your...

And the... and the, this...

And the...

My working on a loom?

- My, my...

- No.

...double-handed craps. My...

- I...

- My Jazzercise.

- Rowing. Rowing.

- Rowing?

- Championship?

I never would have got that.

But you know what I mean.

That I didn't think that you...

liked me.

But I do. Oddly.

You're... different.

And a deeply terrible mime.

Well, I asked you out.

Then when I saw you at the bar,

I practically tackled you to the ground.

What part of that was confusing?

Here, here, here, sit down.

Look, my radar for that kind of thing

is so bad.

I mean, I don't know if a man's

interested in me until he's naked.

I mean, the pants come off

and then I'm like,

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