Mr. & Mrs. Smith Page #2

Synopsis: John and Jane Smith are a normal married couple, living a normal life in a normal suburb, working normal jobs...well, if you can call secretly being assassins "normal". But neither Jane nor John knows about their spouse's secret, until they are surprised to find each other as targets! But on their quest to kill each other, they learn a lot more about each other than they ever did in five (or six) years of marriage.
Genre: Action, Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Doug Liman
Production: 20th Century Fox
  9 wins & 18 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.5
Metacritic:
55
Rotten Tomatoes:
59%
PG-13
Year:
2005
120 min
$186,200,000
Website
10,489 Views


You're in trouble now.

- $60, eh?

- In.

Look at the big man over there!

Let's play some poker!

- Fives.

- He's got 14 different tells!

You are bleeding William Tell.

- What the hell is this?

- Sorry, Lucky.

You're done, pal.

Thanks for the memories.

Oh, you Lucky? No kidding.

What is it, kid?

You looking for a job or something?

You are the job.

Pair of threes.

- Have you been a bad boy?

- Yes.

You know what happens to bad boys?

- They get punished.

- Ooh, yeah. Punish me.

Have you been selling

big guns to bad people?

Mister Racin?

Mister Racin? You OK?

Oh, the Colemans.

He's down!

Taxi?

- Hey, hon.

- Hey, baby. I didn't hear you downstairs.

Yeah, I went to the sports bar.

Put some money on the game.

Yeah? How'd you do?

I got lucky.

Welcome, neighbors!

- Hi, Susan.

- Good to see you, John.

- There you go.

- Oh, this is wonderful.

Thank you.

- What a lovely dress.

- Thank you very much. So is yours.

- Come on, let's go see the girls.

- Don't stray too far, guys.

You want a Cuban?

No, I don't smoke.

- Clean body, clean soul, Suzy says.

- Ain't that the truth.

- You guys have any vices?

- Well, you know.

- Can I get you a drink?

- Yes. Chardonnay, please.

- Girls?

- Chardonnay.

- Daddy!

- I'll be up here at the filling station.

...stock's getting butchered.

- Hey, boys. Scotch?

- Yes, sir.

- It's a bloodbath over there.

How'd you make out last quarter?

Take a beating?

Actually, I got all my dough

buried under the tool shed.

- So, Chuck got the promotion.

- Oh, my God, that is so great.

So excited. We can finally

put the addition on the kitchen.

Oh, shoot. Not again.

Shoulda worn a raincoat.

You know what? Would...

Can you hold her for a second?

- What? No...

- It's all over the appliqu.

- Oh, no, I...

- No, please, just...

Sure.

Seltzer.

Aw, she likes you.

I liked your dress tonight.

It was nice.

Thank you.

Good morning, Mr. Smith.

There's trouble in Atlanta again.

- That's what I hear. What you got?

- I've got your boarding pass, taxi receipts...

Get rid of that gum.

- You got a tissue?

- And your hotel bill.

- Thanks.

- Don't lose those. Keep them in the envelope.

We've got the new specs for the dam.

- Great, Louie. I'll check those out.

- Here.

- Is Eddie here?

- The door's unlocked.

- Morning, pal.

- How you doing?

Same old same old.

People need killing.

Oh, Johnny.

Little get-together this weekend at my house.

Barbecue, no ladies, dudes only.

It's gonna be awesome.

Yeah, I'll talk to the missus.

You want to use my cellphone?

Maybe give her a call,

in case you decide to scratch your ass

or use the head later.

- Make sure she thinks it's OK.

- You live with your mother.

Why bring her into this?

She's a first-class lady.

And I don't have to check in with her when I

want to do something. She cooks, she cleans.

She makes me snacks.

I'm the dumb guy?

John Smith.

- Hello, John.

- Morning, Atlanta.

Quite the body count this week. We have

a priority one, so I need your expertise.

The target's name is Benjamin Danz,

aka "The Tank".

He's a direct threat to the firm.

DIA custody.

They're making a ground-to-air handoff

to heli, ten miles north of the Mexican border.

I need you to make sure

the target does not change hands.

"The Tank"?

- L-Temp technology...

- Jane Smith confirmed.

Stand by for contact.

Sorry to interrupt, but we have a situation.

You know the competition would love to see

us burn. I need you to handle this personally.

- Target?

- Benjamin Danz.

I'm rolling the specs now.

We need this quick, clean, and contained.

Yes, sir.

- Ladies.

- Morning.

- Morning.

- Hello, Jane.

Yesterday's op:
One kill,

one agent in protective custody.

- We'll get him out tomorrow.

- Two cases of G-40s.

- The grenade launchers are here.

- Order more.

All right. Go, Jas.

The target's name is Benjamin Danz,

aka "The Tank".

- You serious?

- Yeah.

He's being moved across the border

to a federal facility.

The only point of vulnerability

is just south of the border.

I want GPS and SAC of the canyon,

and the weather report for the last three days.

He'll rendezvous with the helicopter at a

deserted airstrip. We've one chance to strike.

Oh, look. More desert.

- Are we green?

- Perimeter is armed. We are up and running.

Red team, red team, this is Broadway Joe.

Half-time is approaching.

Copy that, Broadway Joe.

Oh, come on...

- You getting this?

- Affirmative. Is it a threat?

Countdown's initiated.

The convoy is not in the zone yet.

An idiot's in the field.

He'll blow the charges.

OK.

You gotta be kidding me.

Civilians.

Let's get a tune out of this trombone.

Picking up a weapon signature.

Sh*t. Not a civilian.

Aw, man...

A**hole.

Countdown is initiated.

You should so not be allowed

to buy these things.

Abort!

I think I got ID'd on that hit.

You ever been ID'd on a hit?

- Not that I'm aware of, no.

- Right. I'm in trouble.

- You get a look at him?

- Little thing. Buck ten, buck fifteen tops.

Maybe he's Filipino.

I'm not even sure it was a him.

You saying that you had

your ass handed to you by some girl?

I think so. A pro.

Well, it shouldn't be that difficult. I mean,

how many chicks are hitters out there?

- You guys want any dessert?

- What do you have, honey?

- Ice cream.

- Delicious. What flavors?

- Chocolate and vanilla.

- I don't like those.

But mixed together,

that could be nice, you know what I mean?

And not just the little pink spoon,

I like the whole sundae.

- That could be arranged.

- Perfect.

"Could be arranged. " You hear that? I'd like

to have her kick my ass, know what I mean?

- Any other details besides her weight class?

- Laptop.

Sorry? You're in a whole zone right now...

- Laptop.

- OK, laptop.

I want to know who that b*tch is.

Get me that tape.

- Jane.

- Get me that tape.

- What?

- It's Father.

The FBI secured the package.

The window's closed, sir.

- I told you we couldn't afford mistakes.

- There was another player.

We do not leave witnesses.

If this player ID'd you... You know the rules.

You have 48 hours to clean the scene, Jane.

Looking forward to it, sir.

All right, we have a new target.

Let's find out who he is.

Jesus... What did you do to it?

Put a campfire out with it?

Buy a new one.

This one has sentimental value for its owner.

- Who's that?

- Well, Gwen, I'm just hoping you can tell me.

So, why you gotta know so bad, anyway?

You know, just trying

to return some lost property.

- Hey, Phil.

- Hey, John.

- You a vegan?

- No.

My girlfriend is.

Here we go.

Upgraded RAM module.

Chip's Chinese.

Imported by Dynamix. Retailed by...

You know, I might be able

to get you a billing address.

All right? No name, just an address.

New York.

You know the place?

Sweet Jesus! Mother of God...

Why don't you both go make some coffee?

Jane, it's your husband.

He's back from Atlanta

and he wants to know about dinner.

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Simon Kinberg

Simon David Kinberg (born August 2, 1973) is an British-born American screenwriter and film producer. He is best known for his work in the X-Men film franchise, and wrote and/or produced several other box-office successes such as Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Sherlock Holmes, Cinderella, and The Martian, earning an Academy Award nomination for the latter. His production company is Genre Films (usually credited as Kinberg Genre), which has a first-look deal with 20th Century Fox. more…

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