My Life In Ruins Page #7

That's lovely.

Classic.

-All right, who wants the last pancake?

-Delicious.

Hook me up! Hook me up now!

I feel like I've had a month of Sundays.

I'm gonna re-up the firewood

to get a bigger fire.

Hey, I've got something better for that fire.

Yes! Yeah!

She did it.

That really burns.

It's a blazer!

Keep your day job.

-All right.

-What?

-Oh, yeah.

-Not the cell phone.

No, no, no, you're not.

Yes! Yes! Burn it.

I cannot believe you just did that.

I feel lighter.

I can't believe it. Irv?

-Irv!

-Wait.

-What happened?

-Irv.

-Irv!

-What's wrong?

-Call an ambulance!

-I'll do it.

Now, you stay with us!

And you listen to my voice, all right?

Irv? Irv?

So we've been told the hospital

is keeping him for observation.

They're gonna run some tests and...

-When does he get out?

-Well, they're not sure, Gator.

They really aren't. The doctors actually

won't know anything until he wakes up.

But, look, they don't know Irv

like we do, right?

-Right.

-Yeah.

All right. This is the propylaeum.

Just up those stairs is the Parthenon.

How many more stairs?

About 30, 50. A lot.

It's okay.

We're tired, and the stress of Irv is... Yeah.

Anyone who wants to, follow me.

Incredible, isn't it?

-Tell us about it.

-Yeah, what's the John Dory?

Well, we have traveled

within a very mysterious triangle.

Delphi, Athens, Olympia.

And this city, Athens, got its name

from the goddess of wisdom, Athena.

And the Parthenon was built to honor her.

It was finished in 432 B.C.

Let me tell you why I love it here.

Listen to the sound of the wind

blowing through the columns.

That is the same wind that

mankind has listened to for centuries.

It's the sound of nature

meeting human imagination.

And for me, that's history.

I tell you what, Angie.

It's just plain beautiful. That's what it is.

-It was lovely.

-Best thing I ever set eyes on.

It's Greek-alicious.

Yes, Gator.

There's still something I haven't seen.

What's that?

A Greek hospital.

-Yeah.

-Yeah.

-Good call, Gator.

-I'd like to see one of those, too.

I know a good one. I'll take us all.

Fine, fine, take your stupid pictures

and I go get you some ice cream.

Good morning, Nico.

Yeah? I have a headache in my head.

The bus air conditioner, it break,

and these American idiots

never stops to complain,

complain, complain.

Wait a minute!

Did you just call us Americans?

Americans, Canadians.

What's the difference?

You jerk!

Runs like a sheila!

And the Greek word for hospital

is nosocomio.

Say it with me.

Very good. This is one of

the finest hospitals in Athens.

Only the best for our Irv.

-Hey, hey, hey.

-Irv!

Dude!

This nice guy is for you.

You coming

to the farewell party tonight, then?

Here you go, mate,

shove that down your gullet.

This is great. Thank you, all.

-Looking good, Irv.

-Made in America, Irv.

Because you missed the Parthenon.

-Wear it in good health, boss.

-You're in the pink, Irv.

Friends.

This is great.

So many visitors. Nice.

-Now get out, yes.

-Take care of him.

Get well, Irv.

-You're looking good, Irv.

-Hey, stay up, man.

-Yo, Gator.

-On you, mate.

-Bye, Irv.

-Dorcas.

Bye, Irv.

Thank you.

My pleasure.

Say, "Cheese."

Great buffet, Ange.

These baklavas are a riot.

Angie, I've got benecoupola and dolmades

and they look very good.

-Or, as they say in Greek, poli kala.

-That's pretty good.

Hey, listen, it's not a big deal,

but my name is not Angie or Ange.

Yeah. We know. It's Georgia.

So why do you call me Angie?

Look at you.

You look just like Angelina Jolie.

You know,

that actress that adopts everybody.

-We love her.

-You must get that all the time.

Yes, I do. Yes.

Look who's here.

-Hi.

-Caitlin, hi.

-For you.

-Thank you.

Let's have a look at you.

No, I cannot count the ways

You have made my life so blessed

All I know is that you came

And made beauty of my mess

You make me happy

You make me feel the way I do

Hey, Poups.

You know, you turned out to be all right

for a guy that doesn't say much.

-Am I interrupting something?

-It's all right.

Excuse me.

-I'll get some wine.

-Okay.

Georgie, I got these for you.

Dorcas, you shouldn't do this.

It's all right. I've got the receipt.

-Good for you.

-Well, it's a start.

-Georgia. I saw you.

-Good.

To my hand you can speak.

You wrote this. "Excellent."

"Georgia is terrific."

"Georgia is wonderful."

"You are so lucky

to have someone like Angie."

I look like Angelina Jolie.

No, you don't. Who wrote this?

-I did. I wrote that.

-I did.

-I did.

-I totally did.

-We love Angie.

-Georgia.

-She's the best.

-Thank you, guys.

It's a fluke. So no raise.

Fine.

All right, 10%. That's as high as I go.

Okay.

You didn't get a letter from me, did you?

Sure I did. Butt-smoocher.

"Dear Maria,

you are my only friend in Greece."

The rest got stained. Coffee?

Coffee?

Everybody should take the time

for a coffee.

I've heard everyone should take time

for a coffee.

I just said that. What?

You found your kefi.

Yes.

And who the hell are you?

-Procopi.

-Who?

-Procopi.

-Who?

-Poupi Kakas.

-Shut up.

Maria, will you make me a full-time driver?

Okay. Georgia, 20%. That's as high as I go.

Okay. Why are you being nice to me?

-It's open.

-Michigan University.

You got the job there.

I have a job here.

And it won't be easy.

Nico? He quit. Mama's boy.

I knew his father. Same thing.

-Are you sure?

-Yes, I'm sure.

-If you'll be my driver.

-Of course.

-Will you hold on just a second?

-I'm waiting.

Everyone. Everyone.

I'm so happy I met you,

and I'm gonna miss you all.

To Georgia!

To Georgia!

-To Irv!

-To the Irvinator.

Okay, so I'm staying in Greece.

I have no idea what's going to happen.

But as the man says,

"How do you plan life?"

I've waited a long time to be this happy.

And the thing about happy...

Wait. What was I saying?

Yeah, I'm gonna enjoy it.

-Teach me to dance.

-Dance?

Did you say dance?

And now we dance.

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