My Life Without Me Page #7

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and he blew out the candle,

and hid the bowl of peanuts,

and I said

"No, don't blow out the candle.

Don't hide the peanuts. "

And all this year,

all I could think about was

that bowl of peanuts

and how I started to cry.

So this year,

I baked myself a cake.

'Cause I knew if I went back to that bar,

I'd give that kid a heart attack.

Start the car.

Five minutes.

You're almost done, too.

- Am I hurting you?

- No, not at all.

She's great with nails.

Now, don't you ask her to give you

a perm or braids or anything,

but with nails, she's the best.

I've got a manicure diploma

and everything. I'm not interested

in hair or heads.

Give me hands every time.

So do you like Milli Vanilli as well?

I'm from Segovia. We don't have

any Mili Vanilli in Segovia.

Milli Vanilli is universal.

- Thank you very much.

- Thanks.

So, see you soon.

No.

No?

You know,

braids really suit you.

They look really great on you.

You think so?

Yeah.

Bye.

Hi...

Hi.

How are you, Ann?

This is Penny and this is Patsy.

Penny's six and Patsy's four.

They're very pretty young girls.

You haven't been wasting your time.

You could say that.

What about your husband?

Don?

Ah, he builds swimming pools.

Swimming pools, no less?

Yeah, he's doing pretty good.

I got work here, you know.

Sewing sports shoes together.

You know, a sports shoe can take up to

86 different pieces. Did you know that?

No.

We sew the side pieces on here,

and then

in another jail they finish them off.

It's good work.

Sure.

People are always gonna want to

need shoes, huh?

Ann, I suppose your mother

still hates me.

Dad, Mom hates everyone.

Yeah, I bet she hates me

the most.

Sometimes, yeah.

Some of us...

just can't live the kind of life

that other people want us to live.

No matter how hard you try,

you just can't do it.

I guess.

- You believe me, don't you?

- Yeah.

I believe you.

It's hard.

Like you know

you love someone

and you can't make them happy.

It's kind of like you love them, but...

you can't love them

the way they wanna be loved,

you know what I mean?

If you send me the kids' shoes sizes,

I can make some shoes for them.

Okay.

I want to touch your face.

I remember how it used to feel.

I've forgotten a lot of things.

I remember that.

I remember,

you used to before you'd leave the house

you'd put on this record of ringing bells

and then you'd just leave

the house like right away.

I used to like to hear

the music from the house

as I was walking down the street.

It was really pretty.

It was?

It was always the same record.

It was the Mule Serenade.

It was really pretty.

Take care of yourself, Dad, okay?

Yeah, you too.

And remember to send me

the girls' shoe sizes, okay?

Yeah, I will.

Going to have a good day

at school? Give me a kiss.

Okay, have a good day.

I hope you feel better, Mommy.

I want you to feel better, yeah.

- Okay. You have a good day, all right?

- Bye.

Hey, Patsy.

- Give me a cuddle, Mommy.

- I'll give you a cuddle.

- How's that for a cuddle?

- Okay.

- I need to go now.

- You have to go to school now?

Okay. I know,

you're in a bit of a hurry.

Are you sure this is anaemia?

Maybe we should go see

another doctor?

No, I know it's anaemia.

They did like a million tests

and I've been taking all the vitamins.

They just told me I need to rest.

I took care of all of you guys

when you were sick,

it's your turn to take care of me.

Okay.

I think I'm going to like

taking care of you.

Yeah? Let's see

if you're any good at it.

Okay. Bye.

Don,

I want you to understand

why I didn't tell you I was goinna die.

It was like...

It was like the only present

I could give you and the girls,

to save you all the trips to the hospital

and all the stress

and the waiting around in waiting rooms

and I know if you think about it,

you'll know that I'm right.

Now you have to be happy,

and you have to look after the girls,

you have to make them happy too.

Dream up a heaven for me.

Don't let them be sad

when they remember me.

You just remind them

of all the great things we did together.

I love you, Don.

You'll always be the guy who took off

his T-shirt to wipe away my tears...

Sorry it's so out of key.

It always kind of was, though.

Hi, Mom.

Well, I guess you're never

going to forgive me

for not telling you

I was going to die.

So, it's just one more thing to blame

the world for, I guess.

I love you.

I know you love me.

I know you adore the girls,

so please

tell them that.

Try and show like you love them

just a little bit every day.

And try to enjoy life,

you know, a little, just a little bit.

I mean, maybe at some point

you could go on a date.

That would be fun,

or you could put an ad

in the paper or anything.

I just think

you could have a little fun.

You're really beautiful

and you've got a great heart

and just try

and enjoy stuff more.

Please help Don.

You can tell the girls

any stories you like,

even Joan Crawford movies.

Your sister really knows

how to pick a song, hey.

- You like it?

- Yeah, it's great.

It's Blossom Dearie.

You ever heard of her?

No. What's that?

Blossom Dearie?

Oh, she's amazing.

She's still singing

and she's 83 years old.

83?

And she plays in this little club

behind a Chinese lounge

and

she has this tiny little voice,

this tiny little body

and such personality and...

- 83.

- Yeah, she's 83.

I'd love to take you there.

Ann, there's so many places

I'd like to take you.

Tell me about all the places

you'd like to take me.

Okay.

In the south of Chile,

there's a desert,

it's stunning,

pure white and flat

as far as the eye can see

and the only thing that breaks

the line of the horizon

are these robin-egg

blue little houses

and in the morning,

the sky goes

completely green.

It's unworldly.

And in Argentina,

a glacier lake,

and in the spring

when the thaw comes on,

these huge blocks of ice,

I mean huge,

the size of apartment buildings,

come sliding off the glacier

into the lake

and then your heart is pounding out

of your chest, it's terrifying.

And Mexico and Alaska...

Are you OK?

What's the matter?

I'm not going to see these places.

What is it?

What's the matter?

You don't wanna tell me?

I'm so sorry, Lee.

- I really need to get out of here.

- Okay.

Waiter!

Can I get the check?

Thank you.

I always wanted to come here.

Could you get them to put this

in a doggy bag for me?

Sure.

Thanks.

Okay, I'll meet you outside, okay?

You have to go.

He's gonna be here any minute.

He works nearby.

It's better if he comes and picks me up.

This happens occasionally, so...

Ann, there's something that I have

to tell you, and I have to tell you now.

I love you.

I'm in love with you...

and the world seems less terrible

because you exist.

I feel like I wanna be with you

for the rest of my life,

and all that, the palpitations,

and the nerves,

and the pain, and the happiness,

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