My Sister Eileen Page #6

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I don`t just mean of sophisticated New York.

I mean of the whole country,

of every state in the Union,

of Maine and Texas and...

-Ohio?

-And Ohio.

-Columbus, Ohio?

-Yeah, sure, sure, why not?

In other words, if you were to read stories

written in Columbus,

about Columbus, I mean,

if you thought they were good stories...

Why, l`d print them, naturally.

That`s just what l`m talking about.

That`s what The Manhatter should be like.

Say, aren`t you getting tired of this bus?

-Not the bus so much.

-Me, too. Let`s get off and walk.

No, l`m not gonna quit.

Anybody can walk out. That`s easy,

but l`m going to stay

and fight Craven to a finish.

Here, here, wait a second.

I`m not through yet.

Come and sit down.

You see, there`s a thrill to this job,

if I can do what I want.

Work on stories that are alive, and help

authors with talent to dig those stories out.

What do you think?

I think it`s just fine, Mr. Baker,

and I also think it`s after 3:00.

And if I ever come across the kind of author

you`re looking for, l`ll let you know.

-Good night.

-Hey, wait a second.

What for?

I can`t even get a word in edgewise.

I can`t seem to remind you

that l`m an author,

and that I have written some stories

about Columbus. Remember?

Sure, and I read them.

Yeah, and it took till 3:30 in the morning to

find out they aren`t even worth mentioning.

-What are you talking about? They`re good.

-They are?

-Yes.

-Well, why didn`t you say so?

-Didn`t l?

-No.

Well, l`m telling you now.

They`re quite good.

-Just quite good.

-Well, isn`t that enough?

You mean, if you could publish them,

you wouldn`t?

No, I wouldn`t. The people come off,

but the stories are flat.

They don`t get anywhere. Nothing happens.

That`s because not enough happens to you.

It doesn`t?

That`s what I said.

Why, you can`t lead a quiet, sheltered life...

Quiet? Sheltered? Down in that tunnel?

With subway blasts bouncing me

all over the bed,

and Appopolous, our Rasputin landlord,

and Eileen dragging home

newspaper geniuses,

and drug-store Romeos and anything else

she happens to meet up with during the day,

and football players drifting through

in their drawers

and odd callers looking for good old Effie.

Not to mention the rest of the world

snooping through the window

as though we were some kind

of a public exhibition.

-Hire a hall!

-Shut up!

-Did you say sheltered?

-That`s it, that`s exactly the stuff.

-Well, go on, write it.

-Write what?

Well, about all those people.

Start your story in Columbus.

Bring it to New York.

Write about Rasputin, Eileen, the blasts,

the menagerie. Gee, it`s wonderful.

Why, many an author would give

his right hand for material like that.

I see what you mean.

Of course, of course, l`m going to do it.

-When can I have it?

-I don`t know.

I`m gonna work right now. You`d better

go home before you get killed. Good night.

-Quiet!

-Shut up!

What do you think this is,

Grand Central Station?

-ls that you, Ruth?

-Yes, dear.

-What`s all that noise out there?

-Nothing, just me.

-Well, what time is it?

-3:
30.

You were out with a man.

-And you`ve had no experience with men.

-lsn`t it awful?

Aren`t you ashamed?

And you were supposed to take care of me.

Eileen, I love New York.

I love everything about it.

I like the air. I like...

You must get pretty plastered

after a day`s ironing.

But I don`t touch a drop

after the football season starts.

Is that all you do, play football?

Well, I tried breaking

into the wrestling racket,

but you`ve got to rehearse so darn much.

Which way do you want

these pleats turned?

Toward Mecca.

Well, there it is. All finished.

You know, I got a swell story

you ought to write.

How Helen and me met and got married.

I had a job peddling vacuum cleaners,

and my first day out,

my first client was Helen.

Well, I started to give her a demonstration,

and before either one of us realized it,

we were in love.

I never did get back to the office.

Well, what happened to the vacuum cleaner?

It`s upstairs. We still hear from the company.

That`d make a great story, Wreck.

Tell Eileen l`ve gone up to see Mr. Baker.

I`ll be back in a couple of hours.

Okay.

Wreck, you said

you`d only be here a couple of nights.

That means you`ve gotta get out tonight.

Yeah, I know, Ruth,

but the old lady didn`t arrive on schedule.

Sorry, Wreck, but I need this place

to work in. I`m afraid that`s final.

Yeah, but she`s liable to blow in any minute.

What are you looking at, you old bezel?

Well, of course I wrote it in an awful hurry.

There`s still lots of things I could do with it.

-Nothing that I can see.

-Terrible, huh?

No, it`s great. As far as l`m concerned,

it`s in the next issue,

and Mr. Craven will have read it

in a half hour. You wait here.

You know you`re quite a gal.

I like you very much.

-He`s had it over an hour.

-Now, now, don`t you worry.

He`s a slow reader. Sit down and relax.

Say, where`s that Sherwood contract?

In a few minutes, Mr. Baker.

Gee, l`ve never signed a contract before.

He might not like the story.

Come here.

Look, here`s the layout of the next issue.

I wanna show you where your story will go.

Wait. I meant to tell you. I don`t like the title.

I don`t like it, either.

-Well, we`ve gotta get another one.

-Well, I have thought of some others.

-Like what?

-Well, it all seems to hinge on Eileen.

I mean, she`s in it so much

that I thought of simply calling it...

-``My Sister Eileen.``

-Yes, yes, that`s it.

Might be good. It might be perfect.

Let`s see what it looks like.

-``My Sister...``

-Now.

-Sorry to intrude.

-lntrude, nothing. We were waiting for you.

Nice job.

I didn`t think Columbus had it in her.

What did I tell you? It`s a magnificent job.

Yes, she ought to be able

to sell that somewhere.

What? Why the dickens

do you think I asked you to read it?

Because you want to put it in The Manhatter,

but it`s not the type of material

for our policy. I thought we settled that.

No, we haven`t. As a matter of fact,

you and I are gonna have a showdown

on policy right now.

-No, please.

-Why?

Because this happens

to be Miss Sherwood`s story?

What are you talking about?

No, because it happens to be

the finest thing of its kind l`ve ever read.

But the wrong kind.

Look, Frank, either that story goes

in our next issue, or I quit.

No, that`s absurd, Mr. Baker.

Well, I guess l`ll have

to accept your resignation, Bob.

Good.

But not until that issue is off the press,

unless you don`t care about another job

in the publishing business.

Thanks for letting me see

your delightful story, Miss Sherwood.

The Sherwood contract, Mr. Baker.

I don`t think we`ll need this now.

-Wreck, Wreck!

-What`s the matter, honey?

It`s Mother. She saw you.

She said she happened to glance in

the window, and a naked man cursed at her.

You mean that old wagon is your mother?

She`ll come down here and accuse the girls,

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