Neighbors 2: Sorority Rising Page #2

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like this entire room

is just a giant arrow pointing

upstairs so they can f*** us.

Oh, my God!

'Sup? You wanna

go upstairs?

Who are you asking?

I don't wanna be rude. I really

don't have a preference.

No.

'Scuse!

This isn't exactly

what I expected, you know?

Yeah, you mean this f***ing

sucks, right? Yeah.

And does no one

know that the same song

keeps playing

over and over again?

Oh, my God, I noticed!

And it makes me want

to blow my brains out.

Hi, I'm Nora, by the way.

Hi, I'm Nora.

Yeah, no.

Let's get out of here!

Let's leave!

I am so happy I

found you guys-

That was the most

weird party ever.

I thought college parties were

supposed to be fun or something.

Yeah, I felt unsafe.

It was super rapey in there.

If I'm being honest,

I've never done drugs before,

but college is

about new experiences.

And here I am,

and I'm gonna do weed.

Okay.

Just take a little bit.

Wow, that's a big hit.

Oh, my God.

Are you okay?

Oh, my God. Do you need some water?

Are you okay?

Oh, my God. I think

she's gonna boot.

If she boots, I boot.

You're beautiful.

She's good.

I think this is my thing now!

I can't believe you

never smoked in high school.

What did you do in high school?

I didn't tell

you guys. Okay.

Um, I've been in a pretty intense

relationship since third grade.

Oh, my God,

like Cory and Topanga?

Stop!

Yes, exactly.

That's such a good call.

That's the cutest thing I've

ever heard in my literal life.

Yeah, exactly like that.

Personally, I've made

love to three men.

Two were black.

And one was Indian.

Um, I've done like

everything, but...

But what?

Like everything you can do,

but that one thing.

You've never eaten

out a guy's ass before?

No, no.

No. I mean, I dunno.

High school kind of sucked,

if we're being totally honest.

Yeah, my dad was super strict,

I had really early curfews.

When he dropped

me off at college,

he gave me a rape whistle

and this huge speech on how to

behave myself as a young woman.

Yeah, I mean, because

of all that I guess

I didn't really have much of a social

life when I was in high school.

Girl, you don't have

to say it. We get it.

You had no friends.

Knock, knock, knock!

Hey! R.A. coming through.

What up, homes'?

Hi, Dustin!

Kind of smells a little funky!

Hmm.

- Okay. Are we clone here, guys?

- Um...

First warning,

just the first warning.

I'm kidding.

You're adults.

You're in college.

You scared the crap out of me.

Were all of you smoking weed?

We smoked weed.

God damn it!

I f***ing knew it!

You don't do drugs.

Do you?

Okay, we're cool?

I'll see you fools later.

Hit me up if you need me.

Peace.

God.

Oh, my God.

I am so sick and tired of all

these guys coming into our lives

and trying to

tell us what to do.

We're not little girls anymore.

We are strong adult women.

Yeah, and sororities can't

even throw their own parties.

We can't even

enjoy the frat party.

We can't have fun in our dorm.

You know what we should do?

We should start

our own sorority.

One that can party the way

that we want to. Mmm-hmm.

And like, most importantly,

we can make sisters for life.

Yeah!

I wanna be your sister.

I wanna be your sister.

Okay-Oh, my God!

BFF!

BFF! BFF!

I told you guys to

shut the f*** up!

Poker night!

Selfie stick!

Yeah. So I've been designing

Outback Steakhouses.

Congrats.

Lots of Outbacks.

But, dude, tell me what's

going on with your app.

Changing the world and sh*t.

You know, one dick at a time.

Seriously, that's a great idea, man.

Thank you!

An app that makes

pics of your dick bigger.

I meant to tell you,

I enjoyed your TED Talk.

Oh, thank you so much.

Thanks for watching.

You're so successful.

Well, I'm still a cop,

which is not that bad.

You know,

it's a lot of rules now.

We gotta wear body

cameras and all of that.

I don't know why

they gave me one.

It's not like I'm

gonna shoot myself.

But, hey, I figured if you

can't beat 'em, join 'em.

What are you up to, man? How you doing?

Yeah, that's real good.

Work's been a little

bit of a bummer.

They eliminated

the shirtless models,

so now I have to walk around

in this monkey suit.

Looks like

a really soft sweater.

And then you

know what else, too?

I'm the oldest person

there now by six years.

I had to cover

for my boss, Mason,

because he had to

go to his "prom."

When did everyone in

retail get so young?

Hmm.

I just feel, like, really

undervalued, you know?

Yeah, for real.

- At least I have you guys.

- You do!

- I love you guys, man.

- You do.

Delta Psi, man.

Once a week, Delta

week every Monday-

Yeah.

Gotcha.

So, uh, Darren.

Mmm-hmm.

How much you putting in?

I'm going

all in.

Big hand!

Man, what do you got,

a full house?

Hopefully, one day.

Well, you done done

me and you bet I felt it

Oh, my God.

Our song.

What's going on?

I fell right through the cracks

Now I'm trying to get back

Oh, I won't hesitate

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God.

No more, no more

It cannot wait

I'm yours

Oh, my God.

The Greeks believed

we were each half of a whole.

Peter, you are the half

that makes me whole-

This is happening! Oh. my God!

Is this happening?

Look, I don't know

what the rules are-.

I don't know who is

supposed to propose to who.

And you're not a ring guy.

You don't have to wear it.

You know, I guess.

No. That's okay.

Wear it for me.

All right.

Will you marry me,

Peter McCallister?

Yes, you know I will!

Yes! Put it on.

Okay, one, two, three!

USA! USA! USA!

Did he ever tell

you about college?

College was crazy, man!

He used to just crush it.

Slay tang.

No.

Oh, wow.

You were out of

your mind a little bit.

I was figuring stuff out.

Yeah, figuring stuff

out knee-deep in p*ssy.

Oh...

I also used to...

I ate p*ssy.

Not as much as him.

By the way, is it cool...

Can we talk about the living

situation real quick?

Dude, don't sweat that.

Yeah?

Darren, you can

move in any time.

Dude, he's basically

here every night.

Thank you so much!

Yeah. Right. Okay.

Seriously, though. Would it

be cool if Darren moved in

and then you did

not live here anymore?

What do you mean? Why?

I mean, we're engaged.

What did you think

was gonna happen?

That you two would

move into your room,

and that I would

live in my room.

For happily ever after.

We're thinking maybe, because

Darren works from home

that maybe we would

turn it into an office.

And then, maybe one day

uh, a baby's room.

No, babies are real small.

They are.

They're tiny, they're the

size of a little shoebox-

Huh. Doesn't take

up the whole room.

Think of a counter

argument, but I...

Yeah.

Dude, I was just f***ing joking.

You were f***ing...

Totally f***ing with you.

You know what?

I need to go for a run.

You're gonna go right now for...

I'm happy for you guys.

I love you guys.

Bring it in, man. Yeah.

Oh, yeah.

Love you, dude.

Love you, man.

Teddy, don't you wanna grab

your shoes, at least?

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