Newlyweds Page #4

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What are you doing here?

I don't know.

Well, I do.

You know, youre still f***in' crazy.

You know that?

So what do you say?

I can't.

Really?

Yeah.

Yeah, really.

He is about to go home

And get into bed with his new wife.

You know I just...

I wanted him to see that maybe...

I could go get into bed with

somebody too, if I wanted.

That's what guys respond to.

Get a guy jealous and they'll do pretty

much anything you want him to, right?

Nice!

Real nice.

Are you kidding me?

Hey baby!

Hello babe!

Hey!

Good night?

Really good night!

We did 94 covers.

Wow. Wow!

Get in here and get a

glass of red, yeah?

How was your night, huh?

Rende' with the sis'?

Yeah, not quite. Honestly,

I don't even know what to do about her.

Alright? I mean grated,

she's my sister

But I don't know her from Adam...

I mean, you've met her,

she's half f***in' deep end.

I'm really glad to hear you say that

Because I think she's

a little bit in trouble.

She's a, like trouble,

a mean a little bit of trouble.

Just a tiny bit.

Yeah, I know.

Is she here?

No, no, she actually... she went out...

does she happen to have

friends here or something?

She doesn't...

I have no idea, but

She showed up in new York

in the middle of the winter

Without a coat...

I let her grab something from your closet...

I hope that's...

oh.

That's alright.

Yeah. Do you...

do you know which one she took?

No I... don't know.

Long. Looked warm.

Is that bad?

No

There you go

welcome to new York.

Why do you come from los Angeles

to new York in the middle of winter

Without a coat?

I don't understand that.

I think a week is good. Huh?

Totally, I mean that's...

super generous so...

thank you.

No, no! Of course.

You're the boss.

I'll drink to that.

And now Im gonna take a bath.

A bath?

Yeah, and Im gonna take this with me.

Do you um... want ah company...?

No, Im good.

Oh look. It's right here!

I can't...

f***

What the f*** are you...!

Bucky. F***in' put the bat down

Stop it!

He's my friend.

Stop it!

What are you doing to me?

Who's the f***in' guy. Shut the f*** up!

Shut up!

Get the f*** out of here

Noel, wait a second...

get the f*** out!

Get the f*** out of here!

What the f***! Are you trying

to be my father right now?

What the f***! Jesus Christ!

- F*** you, dude!

- Get the f*** out of here!

Take this f***in' scales hat.

What the hell is your problem!

F*** you, man!

Come back here. Wait wait.

I don't know how Katie is gonna

react to this news.

Because she... obviously was upset

that Linda took the coat

And I even lied to Katie

and told her that I gave her the coat.

Steals a coat, brings the dude home,

All within the first 12 hours

of being here?

I mean. This is not...

this does not board well for her visit.

You should just be thankful

that you didn't hear her come in last night.

Why? What happened?

I wake up at 5 o clock in the morning

To find her and some random dude

Totally going at it

on our kitchen counter.

What?

Yeah, I know, it's f***in' nuts.

So that's what that scream was.

Very... very funny.

Yeah, alright. And just for good measure

I gave the kitchen counter

a thorough wipe down thank you.

But that is not the kind of thing you really

want to see your little sister doing.

What did you do?

I kicked them out.

I mean he at least was scared shitless.

And ran out of there, but

She was so f***in'

drunk and screwed up.

I don't know how

you didn't wake up.

She was screaming

and yellin' in the hallway.

And totally went off on me. Wow.

Well, I think your being really harsh.

Is why. Because I this is what

the kids are doing these days.

I think they go to the club,

and they meet random guys,

And they bring them home and...

You know... f*** them on

the kitchen counter.

So that's what the kids are doing'.

Totally! I read it in a magazine.

You are not being

at all helpful here, alright?

This is my sister.

I am...

I did not need that

imagery in my mental files.

No, Im not mad, I mean...

I... why shouldn't she

make herself at home?

She's been here for... 12 hours and...

Um... I never eat breakfast

on that counter, so...

that's why.

I all seriousness

Maybe it makes me a prude,

But I think bringing a guy home,

On the first night your

in a stranger's house is...

Slightly... ah promiscuous?

Dare I say...

I still don't know

how you slept through

The insanity last night.

It was a ruckus affair.

A bomb could of...

I almost took a

head with a baseball bat.

But I love that you went out

there to like... protecting me!

I didn't know what it was!

I heard some noise.

I thought someone

broke into the apartment.

I mean, thank god there

was a light on, you know.

Hold up.

Speaking of...

ah! There she is.

Hello.

Buzzy?... hey, so um...

are you like...

really mad about last night?

Yeah, yeah.

I'm more than a little mad.

Look. I'm sorry. Alright.

I got so drunk.

And we were closer to your

apartment than his place

So I figured it would be more

easy, or something...

So look. Can I uh...

can I come back there or...?

Hang on.

She wants to know is it cool

if she stays with us.

Is she welcome to come back?

Yeah.

You sure?

- Uh hm.

Hey! Good news, yes.

You are welcome to come back.

I am going to work in a little while

But when I get home...

you and I need to

have a long talk about...

guidelines,

if you're gonna stay with us

For a little while.

Okay.

Sure. Whatever you want.

When I get mad, I just...

I see red.

You know. I don't think I just... react.

I get that from my father,

he was very impulsive.

And, you know, sometimes

really great, exciting things happen

From being like that.

Other times, shitty things.

Good morning.

No. No, I didn't.

It was supposed to be with you.

Why?

We can still try again, can't we?

I know! But ah...

I made a mistake!

I was wrong.

I didn't think you

would move to new York

And get married in 10 months.

I thought maybe we'd

have another chance.

I was wrong.

Is that what you want to hear?

I made a mistake

and I was wrong.

Okay.

Fine.

If you are 100 percent sure

That you are ready to walk away

And say goodbye to me forever...

then Ill leave tomorrow

And Ill go back to L.A.

And Ill leave you alone.

But if you're not,

then you call me up, okay?

Hey! Buzzy is that you?

Nope, nope, it's me.

Hey!

Yeah, yeah, I know.

Walk of shame, right?

It happens to the best of us.

Did you um...

you have fun anyway?

You know. It was not the best night.

Oh, buzzy said he

lent you one of my coats.

Oh... f***...!

F*** me.

I must have left it someplace.

You left it someplace?

Do you remember where?

Maybe we could call them, something?

No, I don't. I don't know where it is.

Um...

but maybe...

I could replace it for you?

Was it really expensive?

It was... yeah.

Um... hey. It's okay.

It's really fine.

We're just so

happy that you're here.

Ah, but there are a couple

of things you could do for me

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