Nice Dreams

Synopsis: Cheech and Chong house sit for a marijuana grower and rip off the crop. Stalked by keystone-style cops, Los Guys have a series of encounters with L.A. area characters even weirder than themselves.
Genre: Comedy, Crime
Director(s): Tommy Chong
Production: Columbia Pictures Industries
 
IMDB:
6.2
Metacritic:
54
Rotten Tomatoes:
43%
R
Year:
1981
88 min
611 Views


[###]

[INHALING]

[COUGHING]

[CHEECH MARIN'S "NICE DREAMS"

PLAYS ON SOUNDTRACK]

CHONG:

Where we supposed

to meet this dude?

CHEECH:

There's some room

at the beach, man.

CHONG:
The beach?

CHEECH:
Yeah.

CHEECH:
There's a lot of beach.

CHONG:
Where on the beach?

CHEECH:

Right there. At the end

of this block, man.

We got plenty of time.

If we're early, we'll rehearse.

CHONG:

Hey, don't eat it all, man.

CHEECH:
Hey, man,

we got plenty of this. We're rich.

CHONG:

This looks like a good spot.

[ELECTRIC GUITAR STRUMS]

CHONG:
What's that song

that you're working on?

The protest song?

Oh, Save the Whales?

Yeah, I guess that's it.

Yeah. Yeah. Play.

Yeah.

[SINGING "SAVE THE WHALES"]

Hey, man. How you doing?

Is it all there? Oh, good.

One, two, three...

# Here's an extra one

Don't give it to your children ##

All right, man. Check you later.

Thanks a lot, man.

[SINGS "SAVE THE WHALES"]

It's good ice cream, man. Trip out.

MAN:
This is Homing Pigeon.

Homing Pigeon to Mother Coop,

come in.

This is a hit. Score!

Touchdown and payday.

They bought it.

I mean, we bought it.

Homing Pigeon. Mother Coop,

come in. Homing Pigeon.

It's a success.

Limo preparing to leave.

[LAUGHS]

Sarge is gonna cream for this.

And we got them. We got them!

This is Homing Pigeon

to Mother Coop, come in.

Mother Coop, come in.

Homing Pigeon to Mother Coop.

WOMAN:
Homing Pigeon, go ahead.

They're getting into the truck.

Starting to pull away!

Starting to pull away!

In pursuit! In pursuit!

This is 38-Apple-Baker, over.

We're in pursuit.

Ten-four, in pursuit.

Your direction to travel?

[ENGINE STUTTERING]

Homing Pigeon, your direction?

Come on. Damn it!

Homing Pigeon, come in.

This car's not starting. Hello!

Hello! Help here! Homing Pigeon to

Mother Coop. Get me the Whirlybird

unit. Get me the Whirlybird unit.

We can't get this sucker going.

Whirlybird unit, come in, please.

Come in, Whirlybird unit!

Oh, damn it! They're heading down

Ocean Avenue right now.

Homing Pigeon, come in.

Come in, Whirlybird.

Homing Pigeon

to Whirlybird, come in.

Oh, sh*t!

Homing Pigeon, please repeat.

Hey, man, that dude looked

kinda straight to be buying dope.

Hey, man, don't worry about it.

I checked him out myself, man.

He ain't a cop.

I can smell cops a mile away, man.

They smell like coffee

and doughnuts.

[LAUGHS]

Hey, we're rich, man.

Yeah.

How much money do we have now?

All together?

Yeah, all together.

Let me figure it out.

Let's see. We're out 22 days...

I wanna get me some

more guitars, man.

We got seventeen

million dollars, man.

No...

No, man.

Seven... We got seventeen

something. We're rich, man.

We got a lot of money.

Hey, let's buy a villa in Costa Rica.

That'd be great. I could just...

I'm gonna get some more guitars.

Yeah?

Yeah, I wanna get a Fender.

No, I don't like Fenders.

No, I'll get one anyway.

Let's get one of those big,

white houses, man. You know,

like, with a veranda, you know.

With a porch. We'd be sitting

out there sipping pia colonics, man.

Pia colonics?

Yeah.

What's that?

You know, they make them

in a blender, man. You know.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah.

We'd have topless ladies, man.

Maybe we'll make ourselves sun kings.

You know, buy a little island. We'll put

two little chairs on a little hill, and

every day at noon we'll go up there

and all the natives will bow down

to us and we'll throw them joints,

you know.

I like to help the little people, man.

That's important in life.

Maybe I'll get a Mustang.

Better get your driver's licence

first, though.

That pendejo judge, man...

Maybe I'll buy a judge.

[LAUGHS]

Then I could get my licence back.

Yeah.

I always dreamed, man, if we ever

made it rich, I'd get me a guitar.

Hi, guys.

Hey, how you...? Wow!

Oh, hi, ladies.

We like your truck.

Oh, thanks a lot.

Hey, you guys have

any big sticks for us?

WOMAN:

I mean, really big sticks?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

We got really big sticks.

How about a nice, hot, juicy stick

and you guys can get

in the back with us?

Come on, man! Get after them.

They want a big stick, man.

That's a '55 Bel Air convertible.

Mint condition.

[###]

CHEECH:

Right there, baby.

You want a big stick?

CHONG:
Oh, we lost them.

CHEECH:
Hey, no. There's their car.

All right. Ease up, right over there.

CHONG:

What a bitching car, man.

CHEECH:

Hey, come on, baby,

you want a big stick?

Here comes a special delivery.

CHONG:

You know, my dad had one, man.

I used to drive it all the time.

Why'd he wanna sell it?

Hey, looks like

Dad's car, man.

You can sure tell soon enough.

You can tell by the stains

in the back seat.

God, look at this.

No, the upholstery's too nice.

[CHEECH SINGS]

[DOORBELL RINGS]

Hey, man. Big stick.

Hey, baby want a big stick?

Uh, hi. Uh, want a big stick?

We're in your neighbourhood

giving away free big sticks

to all the dudes who live here.

Hey, man, where's the broads

that own that car out there?

[BURPS]

All right, we're gotta go now.

No, hey, I wanna talk to them.

It's okay, we'll talk to them later.

Hey, man, be cool.

Take it easy. We'll see you later.

But I wanna ask them about the car.

Don't get too big!

[###]

You gonna arrest a brother?

Right this way.

Brother, are you going to arrest me?

Right this way.

I wasn't even there, man.

I can dig it.

Come on, brother.

Let me talk to you.

[LOUD CHATTERING]

[KNOCKING]

Yeah, pass!

Sarge?

Yeah.

We got it. They bought it.

I mean, we bought it.

They fell for it.

Noodles, clear this area off,

will you? Noodles!

Go on, clear this area off.

Move it here.

That's it, sarge.

Anyway, those clowns fell

for it, sarge. We got them

right where we want them.

We just have to move in

for the bust. They got the

marked bills and everything.

We gotta get them now, sarge.

Come on, give us the go-ahead.

Wait a minute.

Did you have this stuff analysed?

Well, what's to analyse?

Look at it. Smell it.

It's marijuana.

Listen, listen! You know

we cannot trust our own instincts.

Now I want you take this down

to the analyser and have it labbed.

Yes, sir.

Oh.

I'll take care of it.

What do you want us to do, sarge?

I want you to leave.

Leave!

Leave.

Right now, leave. We're leaving.

Come on, Noodles, let's leave!

We're leaving, sarge. We'll be

right outside in case you need us,

all right? We'll be right out here.

Come on, Noodles. Noodles!

Come on, Noodles. Move it!

[DOOR LOCKS]

[CHUCKLES]

The only way to catch a doper

is when you, yourself,

become a smoker.

The surest way to make them bleed...

is when you bust their ass

and steal their weed.

[KNOCKING]

DETECTIVE:

Sarge? Sarge?

SERGEANT:

Not now. I need my space.

[###]

CHEECH:

Yeah, that'd be hip, man.

[KEYBOARD PLAYING]

[CHEECH HUMS]

CHEECH:
Ray! What's happening?

RAY:
All right.

Oh, hi, ladies. How you doing?

All right. You guys thirsty?

I've got some good water for you.

Ooh, suck it up.

You're so thirsty. Haven't given you

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Tommy Chong

Thomas B. Kin Chong (born May 24, 1938) is a Canadian-American comedian, actor, writer, director, musician and cannabis rights activist who is known for his marijuana-themed Cheech & Chong comedy albums and movies with Cheech Marin, as well as playing the character Leo on Fox's That '70s Show. He became a naturalized United States citizen in the late 1980s. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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    "Nice Dreams" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 19 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/nice_dreams_14744>.

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