Night Shift Page #2

She sells cowboy hats.

The man was in his underwear.

And cowboy underwear.

Belinda! Come on, darling.

Haul it in here, now.

I'll be right in.

I've got to go.

We'll keep it down.

See you around, neighbor.

I took care of that.

Let's go back inside.

I think I should go home.

Why? They said they'll keep it down.

When did you get dressed?

It wasn't going to be any good

tonight anyway. I feel so guilty!

I cheated today.

- You're kidding.

- I had a Nestle's Crunch bar.

Food.

I feel like dirt.

I am really sorry.

No one else would be

this patient with me.

I'll see you next Sunday.

Food came.

You owe me three dollars.

I'm really getting good

at remembering these cards.

Twenty-one.

Boy, I tell you...

...this weekend is it.

This weekend,

I go to Atlantic City...

...and I do nothing but play blackjack

straight through.

I won't even get a room,

I'll just get those Wash 'N Drys.

You know? Did I tell you

I thought of them first?

Only they already had them.

Twenty-one.

What's the matter?

I ordered egg salad

and they sent me tuna fish.

They always send the wrong food.

Send it back, get what you want.

They get angry if you complain.

It's all right.

The chef has a lot on his mind.

Like what? Curing cancer?

Wait a minute.

Hold the phone.

I got it!

Oh, you're going to cure cancer.

Tuna fish.

What if you mix...

...mayonnaise in the can

with the tuna?

Hold it!

Hold it! Wait a minute!

Take live tuna fish...

...and feed them mayonnaise.

This is good.

Call StarKist.

This is great!

Wall Street Journal?

Why not the Enquirer?

It interests me.

I was an investment counselor.

No kidding?

What's that?

It's like a stockbroker.

So what are you doing

babysitting stiffs?

You're a drinker, big drinker?

Toothead. Doper.

Nose candy. Coke.

Come on.

It was a very rough job!

I'd shape up a deal over two months,

another man...

...would come in

and take all the credit.

I just needed a place that was quiet.

I'm in a transitional period.

What kind of paper is this?

No sports, no comics, no Ann Landers.

Can I help you?

Yes, I'm looking

for a Mr. Blazejowski.

I'm Jefferey Durkin.

You sure are.

How you doing, Jeff?

You got money for me?

Some cash? Some do-re-mi?

- 20 bucks, right?

- 20 bucks. Thanks.

Wait outside while

I'm getting the car.

- Sure.

- All right, there you go.

Nice tux!

Good fit!

I don't want to be a buttinksy,

but what exactly is going on?

Some kind of debutante ball.

Kid wants me to take him and his girl.

You're taking one of

the morgue vehicles?

It's a limo, ain't it?

It's a limo for dead people.

Did you see that kid?

Wait. Are you telling me...

...that every night you leave,

this is what you do?

There isn't a debutante ball

every night.

I do weddings, bar mitzvahs

or just cruise the airport.

I picked up these Japanese guys.

$400 from the airport to the U.N.

You're ripping off diplomats!

Here.

It's $100.

What is this for?

Okay, big-time, let's roll!

Rock and roll!

What happens if we get a call?

If you have to go

and pick up a body or....

I'll be back.

By the time I get there,

they won't be dead anymore?

Hey, kid.

Do you like music?

- Sure!

- Good.

Jumpin' Jack Flash, it's a gas-gas-gas

Okay, Hoppy, lead the way.

Oh, Pebbles! Daddy's home!

Good evening, Leonard.

Hi, Mr. Lumley.

Boy, that Barney Rubble.

What an actor!

We got some bodies in the wrong drawers.

But Uncle Sal said--

I'd straighten it out.

Good night, Mr. Lumley.

Flintstones, meet them Flintstones

They're the modern Stone Age family

"Name of the deceased."

"Something Polish"?

I just saw jerky Leonard.

Why don't we have TV?

Want to hear about my weekend?

I've been working

on my blackjack system.

All right. So.

I go down to Atlantic City...

...and I'm in the casino

with my Wash 'N Drys.

Did I tell you I had

the idea for them first?

Anyway, I'm sitting there

and I'm playing blackjack, right?

They bar me.

They bar me!

I'm out! I'm barred!

I can't get in now.

Right? You know why?

Being too good a player.

How much did you win?

I was down a couple hundred.

But they could tell I was good.

They looked at me and threw me out.

They bar me.

So they deal me off the bottom.

I can tell.

So I yell at the dealer.

He goes to the pit boss.

So I throw my complimentary

watered-down drink in his fat face!

So they barred me

for being too good a player.

Think I'll go to Vegas next week.

I wish you would shut up.

Vegas knows how to treat you right.

Because you got broads

and Wayne Newton.

He's an Indian, did you know?

- I'll introduce you--

- Do me a favor?

Would you please shut up?

You telling me to shut up?

I'm telling you to shut up!

I will tell your recorder

so that you don't forget.

Hello, this is Chuck

to remind Bill to shut up!

This used to be a quiet place

before you came.

You talk too much!

Edible paper?

Feeding mayonnaise to tuna fish?

I will give you a quarter

if you just stop talking!

Thank you.

I thought we were friends.

Hello, this is Chuck

to remind Bill to shut up!

Hello, this is Chuck

to remind Bill to shut up!

Hello, this is Chuck

to remind Bill to shut up!

--Bill to shut up!

Sorry that I yelled at you.

You think it's been easy on me?

I come in here,

I'm the new guy with no friends.

I confide in you my whole life!

I tell you my deepest,

most intimate stuff.

You share anything with me?

I see a picture

of your fiance everyday.

You don't even tell me her name.

I gave you $100.

I didn't ask for it.

That's what made it such

a beautiful gesture.

Never mind. Forget it.

We'll work together every night

like strangers. That's fine with me.

Charlotte.

What?

My fiance's name is Charlotte.

Oh, my God!

Did you fall down?

Did somebody hit you?

It's the other way around.

Somebody hit me and then I fell down.

I wish I had my handkerchief.

I've got tissue in my purse.

Let me do it.

Do you have a handkerchief?

Mugger!

I need your handkerchief.

Thank you.

This was the first time I was

ever beaten up by a bunch of Bluebells.

I didn't like it.

How are you?

I'm great.

Four pounds of makeup,

they'll never know the difference.

Can I ask you a question?

I wouldn't do it with a guy

until he paid me.

So, he beat me up.

That's what happens

without a pimp.

Some guys figure,

why should they pay?

That guy in the morgue.

He was your pimp, right?

A lot of Franklin's ladies

are in the same boat.

We could find another pimp...

...but some of those guys

are real rough.

Get the girls hooked on dope.

Drugs or beat-up.

It's a nice choice.

You could do something different.

You're very bright.

Is your head okay?

Because I'm real tired.

Oh, yeah. I'm fine.

Thank you.

Thanks very much.

I hope everything turns out all right.

See you in the halls.

She was just lying there

in the elevator?

She was all beat-up.

That's why they have pimps.

That's what she said.

She knows a bunch

of girls that need pimps.

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