Nine to Five Page #2

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Here, let me... Let me...

Let me help you with those.

- No, that's okay. Really. I've got it.

- There you go.

- Doralee.

- Yes?

About my conduct in the office

here yesterday...

...I'm afraid I got a little carried

away. I'd like to apologize to you.

I've been chased by swifter men than

you, and I ain't been caught yet.

- Shall we get back to our letter now?

- Yeah.

But, well, could you just come

over here for a second?

I have a little something for you.

You know...

...ever since I made that mistake about

the convention in San Francisco, I...

You didn't make a mistake.

I'll just make sure that the next time

I'm asked to a convention...

...that there is a convention going on.

Nothing happened anyway.

Let's just forget the whole thing.

Fine.

You know, you mean so much more

to me than just a dumb secretary.

I bought this for you.

I picked it out myself.

Well, thank you.

You didn't have to do that.

- It's nice. It's very nice.

- It's also very nothing.

I'm a rich man. I've got a checkbook

on that desk. You just say the word...

- ...and you can write your own figure.

- I could now.

- I sign your name better than you do.

- I'm serious.

Understand? I'm crazy about you.

You're all I think about.

I've told you before,

I'm a married woman.

- I'm married too. That makes it perfect.

- Mr. Hart.

- Please. I want you. I need you.

- What are you doing, Mr. Hart?

Call me Frank.

Frank?

What are you doing on the floor?

Nothing. I tripped.

Hit my knee on the damn coffee table.

- That's awful. Did you hurt yourself?

- No.

What are you doing here?

- You know I hate it when you come here.

- Frank, don't be mad at me.

I came from the travel agency.

They have the most wonderful cruises.

- Hello, Doralee.

- Hi, Mrs. Hart.

- How are you?

- I'm fine. You?

- What a lovely scarf.

- It's a present from your husband.

Frank, that was so thoughtful of you.

I'm just glad he appreciates you.

Put it on.

It's absolutely adorable.

And you are so attractive.

You're sweet. I appreciate that.

Doralee, that'll be all.

You can finish the letter later.

Bye. Let me show you these

brochures. It won't take a second.

- You did promise to go.

- Right.

This is a lovely one.

It's an Italian line.

- Looks like the Love Boat, doesn't it?

- It does.

- Four weeks of sunshine, Frank.

- Four weeks? Are you out of your mind?

You think I'll spend four weeks of

my life drifting around on that boat?

Well, I'll be damned. Just look who

got paid off for services rendered.

That's the scarf you bought.

Who cares? I suppose she deserves it.

I'll bet you can't wait to see

the Xerox room.

Rush memos are always done on

regulation Consolidated letterhead.

So you place it in here, 8.5 x 11.

See that?

Close the bin firmly.

Turn on the power.

Several people have lost their hearing

in this room.

Select a number of copies, make this

a little darker and start to print.

If anything's wrong, watch this panel.

It tells you what to do.

- I think I can handle it.

- Okay. I'll leave you to it.

You're too much. Your wife's going on

vacation. There'll be no stopping you.

Wait till you hear this

new little scheme I've got going.

Come on in here a minute.

What the hell is going on here?

- I'm sorry. It was going too fast.

- Too fast?

- Why didn't you just shut it off?

- Great scheme you got here.

- Right here.

- I'm sorry. I thought I could keep up.

Weren't you checked out on this

machine? Any moron could operate it.

- I was.

- Yeah.

- I know what to do now.

- You do?

Do it, or your first day

will be your last. Understand?

- Yes.

- Clean this mess up and get to work.

Yes, sir.

Dick?

Judy.

What are you doing here?

Well, I just dropped by

to give you these papers.

They're the last. You sign them,

and then you give them to your lawyer.

Okay.

How are things with you?

- Everything's fine.

- Terrific.

I got a job. I'm a secretary.

- Well, how's Liza?

- Fine. She's waiting in the car.

We've gotta go.

Well, so long.

Bye.

- I feel like I was just here.

- You'll get used to it.

Everybody does, eventually.

Medicinal purposes.

Violet Newstead, please hold.

Please hold. Hi, this is Violet.

Mel? No, no, that's 210,

net 30, delivered in nine days...

That's 2% of 440,550... 8,811.

My pleasure, Mel.

Violet, please hold.

This is Violet.

I've got it.

I was waiting for your call.

That route is 32, via Dixie Express.

Don't worry, I've got it

under control. Okay, bye.

Violet News... Oh, come on, kids.

No. Come on, no fighting.

There's more than one peanut butter

and banana sandwich in the world.

Okay. Love you too. No, I don't

want to talk to the dog. Bye-bye.

- Hi, Judy. How's everything going?

- Fine, thanks.

- Would you like to have lunch with me?

- I can't. Thanks.

Maybe tomorrow. I know the cutest

little Italian restaurant near here.

I should stay in the office

and get to know the routine.

- But thanks anyway.

- Yeah. Sure.

- I just don't get it, Dwayne.

- What's that?

I'm as nice as I know how to be

to every person at that office.

Everybody treats me like a bastard

at a family reunion.

- Well, come over here and sit down.

- Well, that hurts my feelings.

- Where's my smile?

- I don't have one.

- They're jealous you're so pretty.

- They're not jealous.

Where's my smile? I want you to smile,

okay? You forget all about them.

- I'm gonna give you a warm reception.

- I just bet you will.

Violet, little coffee.

Yes, sir.

Yeah. What else?

Did you look at the report I did

on the color-coding of accounts?

Last month. I gave it to you.

We could improve efficiency by 20%.

I looked into that, but it needs work.

I'll have to get back to you on that.

Okay.

Violet, I haven't heard from you.

Did you get my memo?

I did. I tore right through it.

Good. You know, we must clamp down

hard on any signs of unionization.

Here comes Mr. Hart, with Mr. Hinkle.

Hello, girls. How's it going?

- Just fine, sir.

- Hello.

Roz, you'll be getting a copy of

this report Frank just gave me.

We are gonna start

color-coding the accounts.

- Frank's done a study of its efficiency.

- Thank you, sir.

Really? Congratulations, Mr. Hart.

- Thank you, Roz.

- Just brilliant.

You're a fine piece of manpower.

Any other reforms you

wanna make are fine with me.

- Thank you.

- It's your floor. Run it as you please.

- Going up, girls?

- No, we're going down.

I can't believe that man.

He has no shame.

He presented my idea to the president

of the company like it was his own.

- Why didn't you call him on it?

- Because I'm playing it safe.

In six weeks he makes the decision

about that promotion.

- Till then I'm playing the good girl.

- Finished?

- Yeah.

- Nice job.

Can you imagine,

a mature woman with four kids...

...installing a garage-door opener,

he still refers to me as his "girl"?

Mom, you gotta relax.

I'm gonna roll you a joint.

Josh, you know how I feel about that.

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