Nine to Five Page #4

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What about you, Doralee?

What's your fantasy for doing him in?

Me? Well...

...I'd like to ride up one day and

give him a taste of his own medicine.

Hey, hot stuff. Grab your pad and

pencil, and get your buns in here.

Yes, ma'am.

Morning.

- Hold it. Hold it right there.

- Is something wrong?

No, nothing's wrong. I just wanted to

check your bod. Turn around a second.

You got a nice ass, Frank.

You should get your pants out tighter.

Bring them up in the crotch.

You got a nice package,

might as well show it off.

- Mrs. Rhodes.

- Come here. I want you to take a memo.

To all personnel...

- That's great cologne you're wearing.

- Thank you.

That stuff's turning me on.

What's that called?

- Stud.

- Stud.

It's very sexy. Only I don't like

that tie you're wearing.

- What happened to the ones I gave you?

- Nothing, I...

- Take it off. Take it off.

- Excuse me?

I can't work with those stripes

glaring at me.

How about unbuttoning that coat and

your shirt? You need to loosen up.

That's better.

- Where were we?

- The memo.

Yeah. By the way,

I got a surprise for you here.

- I am a married man.

- Forget about your wife, Frank.

You may be hers in the evening,

but you're my boy from 9 to 5.

I wanted to show you what I got

for you. Isn't it pretty?

Yes, it's very pretty, but you

shouldn't be buying gifts for me.

Okay, let me put it on you here.

- Now, that wasn't so bad, was it?

- No.

I love your hair. It's so sexy.

Let's go over on the couch.

I'll go look the door.

- Mrs. Rhodes.

- Let's be friendly, Frank.

You need to be a little more cooperative

if you want to keep this job.

I'm not that kind of boy!

One little kiss? What's that gonna

hurt? Who's gonna know?

No. I won't. I won't kiss that mouth!

Frank, you get back here!

I'm warning you. Come back here.

No. I won't.

And he's out of the chute,

ladies and gentlemen.

Look at him.

That's a big, bold hitter.

There's Doralee Rhodes.

She's gonna try to rope this...

She's already got him down.

Let's see how long it takes to hog-tie

this sexist, egotistical, lying bigot.

Just five seconds,

ladies and gentlemen.

I can just see Hart hanging there with

a dumb look, wondering what happened.

What's your fantasy, Violet?

How would you bump him off?

I have to think about it.

For me,

it would have to be like a fairy tale.

You know, something gruesome

and horrible and real gory.

But kind of cute.

Violet, get me some coffee.

Yes, sir.

Sorry.

Thank you.

- Your coffee, Mr. Hart.

- Yeah. Put it down.

Just the way you like it.

- More coffee, Mr. Hart?

- Coffee?

- I think something was in that coffee.

- I think you're right.

- I think it was poisoned.

- Right again.

I think you did it.

- But why? Why?

- Why do you think?

I'm a sexist, egotistical, lying,

hypocritical bigot?

Bingo.

- I had such a good time last night.

- We should do that more often.

- How is Hart? I haven't seen him.

- He didn't talk about yesterday.

He's too happy. His wife left

this morning on a two-month cruise.

Lucky her.

I don't know. She still has to

come back to him, poor thing.

- Let's have lunch.

- I can't. I gotta go shop.

We're running out of everything:

Cat food, ant spray, rat poison.

Hart wants me

to take papers to his lawyer.

Damn it. When you're away,

that only means one thing...

Coffee, Violet.

Now.

Yes, sir.

One of these days, he's gonna

push me too far.

Then I'm gonna let him have it.

Enough is enough.

- We're out of Skinny and Sweet.

- I got some at lunch today.

Who does he think he is? He's

a miserable, petty, two-bit dictator.

Ordering me around like I'm a flunky...

I hate myself for being such a nerd.

He does it to annoy you.

Don't let him get to you.

Besides, the day is almost over.

I tell myself the same thing.

But I feel the pressure building.

I can't take much more. Something,

somewhere, sometime, is gonna snap...

...and God help Mr. Hart, because

I won't be responsible for my actions.

But right now, I'm calm.

Perfectly calm.

No.

Not for one second.

Right. All right, hold it.

Hold it a minute.

I've already told Bob Enright,

and now I'm telling you:

Anything you get from Ajax Warehouse

comes directly to me. Got that?

You're the boss.

Remember that a little more often.

- I see he caught you.

- I'm a tree. I can bend.

Hang in there, honey. It's almost 5.

Listen to me. Ajax is my deal, so you

get your money when I give it to you.

And don't ever call me

at this number again.

Doralee. Doralee!

My goodness!

Mr. Hart. Mr. Hart! Mr. Hart!

Oh, no.

- I'm sorry I'm late.

- Where have you been?

- You missed it.

- What?

They took Hart away in an ambulance,

unconscious.

- They did? Where's Doralee?

- She went with him.

- I hope it's not too serious.

- Me neither.

Maybe a little serious.

Some trifle that'll keep him out of

the office for 20 years. Come on.

I gotta drop this off.

I'll meet you at the elevator.

Oh, my God!

Oh, my God!

Violet, isn't it awful about Mr. Hart?

- How did it happen, Roz?

- Fell and hit his head on the credenza.

- What about the coffee?

- What?

- Where is the coffee cup?

- Here.

It was by him. He must've been

drinking it when he blacked out.

- What hospital?

- St. Ambrose.

Oh, my God!

I know how you feel.

Judy. Judy. Hurry. Hurry.

- What's the matter?

- Something terrible has happened.

I don't believe it. How could you

make such a stupid mistake?

I thought it was Skinny and Sweet.

The boxes are identical, except for

the skull and crossbones.

Are you crazy? Someone will see you!

I've got to get to the hospital,

tell them what happened.

- Don't be hysterical.

- You're right. Keep calm. Keep calm.

- Better speak to Admitting, ma'am.

- Yeah. Right.

My boss was brought in. Franklin Hart.

Dr. Siedelman, line one, please.

Dr. Siedelman.

There we go.

- What's going on?

- Take it easy.

You blacked out. How do you feel?

I feel fine. I just fell off a chair

and hit my head. That's all.

That's quite a bump there. I think

we'll take you upstairs for x-rays.

X-rays?

Wait a minute, doc.

- No x-rays. I like my head as it is.

- We ought to do tests and make sure.

You do tests on yourself.

I know what your racket is.

You're not gonna sucker me into a lot

of medical bills for a bump on the head.

Hey, doc. Cardiac arrest.

- He stopped breathing.

- Open up his shirt.

One, two, three, four, five.

One, two...

Hurry!

That bum.

He was our only witness. We had him

all ready to testify. Now this.

- There's Doralee.

- What are you two doing here?

- Something terrible has happened.

- What?

- Violet poisoned Hart's coffee.

- It was an accident.

- That's why...

- It looks just like Skinny and Sweet.

- Good grief.

- We've gotta tell the doctor.

He's in the emergency room,

first door on the right.

God, there's a policeman.

- What's he doing here?

- I don't know.

- The guy on the gurney, how is he?

- He's not so good.

- When can I speak to the doctor?

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