No Strings Attached Page #7

I can take it.

The world can take it.

OK.

Very pretty here.

So come by the bar. Great place.

Bring your friends.

I will take care of you.

Here's my business card.

I'm the owner. Me.

- So make sure you come by.

- Yeah.

All right? Hey. Great job.

- Yeah, great job, man.

- Really good, yeah.

- You guys liked it? Like really?

- Yeah.

- But Wallace cried.

- So?

It reminded me of my senior prom.

I got a hand job on the dance floor

to "Who Let The Dogs Out."

Hey. Sorry.

OK, so there's good news, bad news.

The bad news is,

Megan is remarkably drunk.

Seriously, she was, like,

trying to take her shirt off.

But the good news is,

she wants to put you on staff.

- Really?

- So... Yeah.

- That's amazing.

- Yeah, so she... Yeah.

- Thank you.

- So, you're a paid writer.

Yeah.

Oh, my God. She's getting on

the buffet table? That makes...

Wow.

Why are you not trying

to f*** that girl?

Yeah.

Yeah, she's crazy hot, Adam.

She's like a sexy scientist.

You need to go over there,

man up, you need to go for it.

We're counting on you here, man.

Man up, man!

- Go for it! Man up!

- You keep saying "Man up."

- You cried during the show.

- I liked the show.

Yeah.

- It was very good.

- It was OK.

You know, I have to...

One minute.

Katie?

The bridesmaids had pot.

Oh, my God, I'm so hungry.

Are you OK?

I'm fine, I just...

You know, I just...

Oh, God, I just love Kevin.

I just love Kevin so much, you know?

- I know you think it's stupid.

- No. No, I don't.

- You don't?

- No.

I can't stop thinking about him.

Who? Adam?

Yeah. I know it's over,

and I'm looking.

It's just no one is as...

- Tall?

- He's so tall.

- So tall...

- And he's so, like...

- Happy?

- Annoyingly happy, all the time.

But he has this...

He has the best heart.

- Call him.

- What? No.

I can't just call him.

I'm too stoned.

Don't argue with me.

He doesn't want me to call him.

I'm the bride.

You have to do what I say.

- We haven't talked in months.

- I'm the bride, it's my day.

It's my day!

Hey, Adam!

Oh, God.

You're so dope.

Did you know that about yourself?

Mama needs to get a cab home, so...

- Yeah.

- Shoot, I left my phone in my office...

I got it, I got it. Hang on. Here.

- Do you want to call and just?

- Yeah.

What are you doing?

Chuck! Chuck!

Will you please f*** off? Please?

- I don't want to go.

- Yeah, all right.

I don't want to go home.

- I don't want to go home.

- Who is it?

"Do Not Call Her" is calling.

Do you want to take it?

I want your face.

Hello?

Hi.

It's Emma. Kurtzman.

From Camp Weehawken.

Yes... What is it?

So, my sister is getting married

in Santa Barbara tomorrow, and...

I don't know. I heard your show is

tonight. Congratulations.

Thank you.

I know this is random. I just...

I miss you. I miss you so much.

OK.

I don't know what to say.

You're... You're calling me because

you're at your sister's wedding,

and she looks happy, and...

...everyone is happy,

and you're not.

I thought...

I don't know what I thought. I just...

I... I guess I wanted to hear

your voice.

- I mean, I know we broke up, but...

- Emma.

We didn't break up.

We never started.

I gotta go. I'm still at work, so...

Have fun at the wedding,

and tell your sister congratulations.

Bye.

Oh, f***.

I have to...

- Go.

- Now.

- Hey. Can I?

- Hey. Of course.

Is everything OK? Are you?

Yeah.

- Yeah. Yes.

- Yeah. Good.

- This is amazing.

- Yeah.

Thank you for this. This...

- What?

- This was all you.

- What? No, I mean...

- No, I'm not here without you.

That's... That's not true.

It's all you.

It's all you. This was all you.

Hey, wait! If you don't make it back

for my wedding, I'll kill you.

Bye. Drive safe.

No, but that was you,

and it felt poignant

that, of course,

the song was "It Was You."

- When Benji and Sari did the kiss...

- They committed to it.

That's what hit. Do you think

they could remix the song?

How drunk was Megan?

She tried to hump my leg.

You have no idea,

the stories that I could tell you.

- No, she really tried to like mount it.

- Yeah, I know.

Yeah, I got it.

Ornery thing.

Hey. How'd it go?

Did you find him?

Yeah. He was with... with a girl.

It was his girlfriend.

And I was in a bush.

- Oh.

- Yeah.

Crap.

- Are you still there?

- Yeah.

OK, get in your car and drive away.

And how much money

do you have on you?

Like ten bucks.

OK. The box of 50

doughnut holes is $5.79.

You're gonna need two boxes.

I lost him.

- I'm so sorry.

- Yeah.

- I love you.

- I know.

So, then when I was, like, 11,

I was in therapy

because I was, like, obsessively

biting my hair,

and then three months in,

my therapist died.

- I know, so that was kind of a bummer.

- Whoa.

But, yeah.

That's why I hate planes.

Thanks.

- So, that's that story.

- Cheers.

Thank you.

- I'm so sorry.

- No...

- That was such a fail on my part.

- It's OK...

- Wait, let me...

- It's fine.

We can... I can do better than that.

- Can we try again?

- Sure. Mulligan.

- Let's... Why don't we?

- OK.

All right.

Oh, my God. This is happening.

Is this really happening?

Oh, my God. You're touching me.

This is so happening.

Maybe we don't need to talk

about everything.

Oh. OK, great. OK. Cool.

Wait. Are you sure

that you want to do this, though?

Yes. Yeah.

OK, 'cause, like, we can just

talk about it, if you want...

- Let's not talk about it.

- Oh, OK. OK.

Wait. Should I take my shirt off,

or do you want to...

Do you want to take it off yourself?

- I'll take it off.

- You know what? I'll take it off.

OK.

Glad I wore a good bra.

Is that your phone? Do you wanna?

We'll just ignore it.

You can just get it.

No, it's fine.

- Is it "Do Not Call Her"?

- No.

I don't know.

Wait. I'll just...

- OK.

- I'll just shut it off.

Yeah, just...

That'll be easier, switch...

- Sorry.

- Yeah.

Vanessa?

- I'm coming.

- You're what?

It's my dad. There's an emergency.

He's in the hospital.

Oh, my God.

OK. Do you want me to go with you?

- No, I'm OK.

- OK.

- Can I call you later?

- Yeah. No, I'll get a cab.

I'll, like, find my way home.

Go. Yeah.

Keep, keep bleedin' love

Keep bleedin'

I keep, keep bleedin'

Hey. Where is he?

What happened?

OK.

Don't freak out, OK?

Your dad overdosed on cough syrup.

- He what?

- The Purple Drank.

"The Purple Drank"?

It's Seven-Up, cough syrup

and a Jolly Rancher.

Why would he do that, Vanessa?

Because he loves Lil Wayne, OK?

You don't know everything

about your dad.

Why are you making him

listen to Lil Wayne?

- You should be taking care of him.

- I can't do this. I can't do it.

You know, I didn't think

that it was gonna be so...

I don't want to have kids.

I... I just... I want to have fun.

- He's so old.

- Yeah. He's getting older.

And you're gonna have to deal with that.

Adam...

old people scare me.

Let's just go see him, OK?

No, no, no. I can't. I can't.

Adam, I can't. I've gotta go.

My friend, she's having a party.

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