Notting Hill Page #10

ANNA:

Definitely. Ths is important stuff.

WILLIAM:

It's one hell of a job. What do you put

on your passport? Profession -- Mel

Gibson's bottom.

ANNA:

Actually, Mel does his own ass work.

Why wouldn't he? It's delicious.

WILLIAM:

The ice cream or Mel Gibson's bottom?

ANNA:

Both.

INT. WILLIAM'S UPSTAIRS CORRIDOR - NIGHT

They are walking up the stairs -- and stop at the top.

ANNA:

Today has ben a good day. Which under

the circumstances is... unexpected.

WILLIAM:

Well, thank you.

(awkward pause)

Anyway -- time for bed. Or...

sofa-bed.

ANNA:

Right.

Pause. She leans forward, kisses him gently, then steps into

the bedroom and closes the door.

INT. WILLIAM'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

William downstairs -- on a sofa -- under a duvet. Eyes open.

Thinking. Pause and pause.

He waits and waits -- the ultimate 'yearn.' But nothing

happens. William gets off the sofa decisively. Sits on the

side of it. Then gets back in again.

Pause, pause, then... in the darkness, a stair creaks. There's

someone there.

WILLIAM:

(to himself)

Oh my God...

(then...)

Hello.

SPIKE:

Hello. I wonder if I could have a

little word.

He drifts round the corner, half-naked.

WILLIAM:

Spike.

SPIKE:

I don't want to interfere, or anything

... but she's split up from her boy-

friend, that's right isn't it?

WILLIAM:

Maybe.

SPIKE:

And she's in your house.

WILLIAM:

Yes.

SPIKE:

And you get on very well.

WILLIAM:

Yes.

SPIKE:

Well, isn't this perhaps a good

opportunity to... slip her one?

WILLIAM:

Spike. For God's sake -- she's in

trouble -- get a grip.

SPIKE:

Right. Right. You think it's the

wrong moment. Fair enough.

(pause)

Do you mind if I have a go?

WILLIAM:

Spike!

SPIKE:

No -- you're right.

WILLIAM:

I'll talk to you in the morning.

SPIKE:

Okay -- okay. Might be too late, but

okay.

Back to William thinking again. Dreamy atmosphere. And then...

more footsteps on the stairs.

WILLIAM:

Oh please sod off.

ANNA:

Okay.

WILLIAM:

No! No. Wait. I... thought you were

someone else. I thought you were Spike.

I'm delighted you're not.

The darkness of the living room. We see Anna in the shadow.

INT. WILLIAM'S LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

A few moments later. William and Anna stand in the middle of

the room. He kisses her neck. Then her shoulder. What a

miracle it is just to be able to touch this girl's skin. Then

he looks at her face. That face. He is suddenly struck by who

it is.

WILLIAM:

Wow.

ANNA:

What?

And then gets over it straight away.

WILLIAM:

Nothing.

And kisses her.

INT. WILLIAM'S BEDROOM - NIGHT

The middle of the night. They are both asleep -- a yard apart.

In sleep, her arm reaches out, touches his shoulder and then

she wriggles across and re-settles herself, tenderly, right

next to him. He is not asleep and knows how extraordinary this

all is.

INT. WILLIAM'S BEDROOM - DAY

The morning.

WILLIAM:

It still strikes me as, well, surreal,

that I'm allowed to see you naked.

ANNA:

You and every person in this country.

WILLIAM:

Oh God yes -- I'm sorry.

ANNA:

What is it about men and nudity?

Particularly breasts -- how can you be so

interested in them?

WILLIAM:

Well...

ANNA:

No seriously. I mean, they're just

breasts. Every second person in the

world has got them...

WILLIAM:

More than that actually, when you think

about it. You know, Meatloaf has a very

nice pair...

ANNA:

But... they're odd-looking. They're

for milk. Your mum's got them. You

must have seen a thousand of them --

what's the fuss about?

WILLIAM:

(pause)

Actually, I can't think really -- let

me just have a quick look...

He looks under the sheet at her breasts.

WILLIAM:

No, beats me.

She laughs...

ANNA:

Rita Hayworth used to say -- 'they go to

bed with Gilda -- they wake up with me.'

Do you feel that?

WILLIAM:

Who was Gilda?

ANNA:

Her most famous part -- men went to bed

with the dream -- and they didn't like

it when they woke up with the reality --

do you feel that way with me?

WILLIAM:

(pause)

You're lovelier this morning than you

have ever been.

ANNA:

(very touched)

Oh.

She looks at him carefully. Then leaps out of bed.

ANNA:

I'll be back.

INT. WILLIAM'S BEDROOM - MORNING

William on the bed. The door opens. It is Anna with a tray of

toast and tea.

ANNA:

Breakfast in bed. Or lunch, or brunch.

She heads across. She smiles and sits on the bed.

ANNA:

Can I stay a bit longer?

WILLIAM:

Stay forever.

ANNA:

Damn, I forgot the jam.

The doorbell goes.

ANNA:

You get the door, I'll get the jam.

INT./EXT. WILLIAM'S CORRIDOR - DAY

William heads down the corridor and opens the door. Outside

are hundreds of paparazzi -- an explosion of cameras and

questions, of noise and light. The press seem to fill the

entire street.

WILLIAM:

Jesus Christ.

He comes back inside, snapping the door behind him. Anna is in

the kitchen.

ANNA:

What?

WILLIAM:

Don't ask.

She heads back the corridor, with no suspicion.

ANNA:

You're up to something...

She thinks he's fooling around. She opens the door, the same

explosion. In a split second she's inside.

ANNA:

Oh my God. And they got a photo of you

dressed like that?

WILLIAM:

Undressed like this, yes.

ANNA:

Jesus.

INT. WILLIAM'S KITCHEN - DAY

Anna is on the phone. Spike is blithely heading downstairs to

the kitchen in just his underpants.

SPIKE:

Morning, daring ones.

He does a thumbs up to William -- very excited about what he knows

was a 'result.'

ANNA:

(on the phone)

It's Anna. The press are here. No,

there are hundreds of them. My

brilliant plan was not so brilliant

after all. Yeh, I know, I know. Just

get me out then.

(she hangs up)

Damnit.

She heads upstairs.

WILLIAM:

I wouldn't go outside.

SPIKE:

Why not?

WILLIAM:

Just take my work for it.

The moment William goes upstairs, Spike heads for the front

door.

EXT. WILLIAM'S HOUSE - DAY

From outside -- we see this scrawny bloke in the frame of the

doorway, in his grey underpants. A thousand photos. Spike

poses athletically.

INT. WILLIAM'S CORRIDOR - DAY

Spike closes the door and wanders along to a mirror in the hall-

way, muttering.

SPIKE:

How did I look?

Inspects himself.

SPIKE:

Not bad. No bad at all. Well-chosen

briefs, I'd say. Chicks love grey.

Mmmmm. Nice firm buttocks.

INT. WILLIAM'S BEDROOM - DAY

William enters. He's unhappy for her. She's almost dressed.

WILLIAM:

How are you doing?

ANNA:

How do you think I'm doing?

WILLIAM:

I don't know what happened.

ANNA:

I do. Your furry friend thought he'd

make a buck or two telling the papers

where I was.

She's packing.

WILLIAM:

That's not true.

ANNA:

Really? The entire British press just

woke up this morning and thought 'Hey --

I know where Anna Scott is. She's in

that house with the blue door in Notting

Hill.' And then you go out in your

goddamn underwear.

SPIKE:

(dropping in)

I went out in my goddamn underwear too.

WILLIAM:

Get out, Spike.

(he does)

I'm so sorry.

ANNA:

This is such a mess. I come to you to

protect myself against more crappy

gossip and now I'm landed in it all

over again. For God's sake, I've got

a boyfriend.

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