Operation Endgame Page #2

of a megachurch laboratory.

Giggly, cute,

f***ing nut.

Watch out.

Very dramatic.

Watch this. That was for us.

She knows we're watching.

Nice.

All right, everybody's back

from Virginia and accounted for.

Check it out.

It's all over the news.

Government authorities

have no further comment

about the warehouse fire

that killed three civilians

and an unidentified fourth man,

whose name has not

been released.

Apparently that's where all

the Cheney death squad files are kept.

Yeah, I told you that.

- No, you didn't.

- Yes, I did.

- When?

- Two weeks ago.

...to the adjacent parking lot.

Authorities have confirmed

that the cause of the fire

was an explosion that occurred

because of a gas leak.

Gas leak, right.

The warehouse,

dubbed a safe house

by the Department of Defense,

was a storage facility

for government documents

reaching back 50 years.

Look, Empress, we all know

Project Safe House was messy.

Messy?

You think it was messy?

I talked to Emperor.

I talked to Chariot.

What do you want me say?

Nothing. You look too f***ing good

with your mouth closed.

- Come on.

- Let me tell you something, Devil.

We, I,

this entire f***ing office

can smell p*ssy

right where p*ssy sits.

Glad to see menopause

hasn't affected your mood.

Yeah, and I don't have to worry

about getting pregnant anymore, either.

Yeah, what?

Oh, wow! Look at you.

You vixen.

What are you,

entering a slut contest?

Why don't you find

a nice little bathroom stall

to go f*** yourself in?

All right, all right,

language, please.

- Is this the new addition to Omega?

- Yeah.

Wow! What was wrong

with the redhead?

She was nice.

She was tall, stately, affable.

No, she was nice.

Way to welcome

the new boy, a**hole.

I was gonna let the walls

of your vagina do that.

What's that awful smell?

Did you just sh*t yourself again?

- Come on, come on, come on.

- I'm wearing a diaper.

Oh, Jesus Christ.

You f***ing reek.

Yeah. Oh, by the way,

this 50-year-old firecracker...

- 49.

- 49-year-old firecracker right here...

- Well, I am 49

- I get it, okay?

This is the Empress.

Most notorious agent

never knew anything about.

Currently the exec

of Alpha Team.

Be a gentleman.

Introduce yourself, come on.

The Fool, I'm a...

Charmed, I'm sure.

And there's the Devil.

Pleasure to meet you

too, sir.

I'm sorry about the redhead.

No need to worry.

We'll get you a little wig.

Anyway, come over here.

I wanna show you something.

Now this, my friend,

it's a rather rare item.

It was awarded to me

for a little job I did in Prague

- a couple of decades back.

- You oversaw, sir...

a job you oversaw.

Oversaw. Semantics,

you know, this is just semantics.

I mean, I just prefer

that my accomplishments resonate

in a more tangible...

Something's not right.

The Devil's acting weird,

even for him.

I know.

I heard he has a thing

for phone sex.

He's been calling 1-900 numbers

on Uncle Sam's dime?

- No, it's someone he knows.

- What?

I accidentally overhead a call.

- Carl.

- I know. I know.

I wonder who it is.

She sounds Slovakian.

So I keep that

as a reminder of my 12 co-workers.

Oh, and as a little reminder

of teamwork.

What are you laughing at?

What did I just say?

- Teamwork, sir.

- You see, no one questioned authority.

Hey, Carl, look.

No one questioned

the decisions of management.

Each one of us did our job,

because to do otherwise...

What the hell

are you doing, old man?

Is that thing loaded?

Oh! F***ing nutbag.

He is just out

of his mind.

Now...

It's a good thing that

this baby hasn't been fired

in a hundred years.

Otherwise, well, my brains

would just be on the carpet.

- Yes!

- Sorry to bother. I just...

Was...

Do you find sometimes

a pregnant pause

- just says it all?

- Yes, sir, the tension's palpable.

I'm hot.

Yes. Yes.

Do you care to fill us in?

- Me and...

- Temperance.

Temperance, we...

- Trained together.

- Right.

Oh, I love to train.

- A couple of years ago.

- Right, a couple of years ago.

Well, let's hope that

fluorescent lighting

will rekindle your romance,

but we have a briefing

in 30 minutes, 10:10.

Leave.

- What the f*** are you doing?

- Hey! We'll talk.

- You gonna order out today?

- Did you just vomit in your mouth?

Man, Temperance is hot

to trot, my man.

She's built

like a f***ing thoroughbred. Uhh!

Body is a well-oiled machine.

I want the details, dude,

all the f***ing details.

There's nothing to be said.

We dated. We broke up.

Dude, I don't give a sh*t

about your relationship.

I wanna know

what she's like in bed.

Man, what do her

insides feel like? Tell me.

All right, look,

let's just leave it, okay, all right?

- Okay.

- What does she do here anyway?

Seduction mostly.

I mean, yeah, she gathers a little intel

after the deed is done,

but mostly she just

fucks dudes.

All right, well, who?

- Which ones?

- Oh my God.

You ever heard of Bill Clinton?

- Oh, you're kidding.

- Yeah, f***ed that guy.

Vladimir Putin

put it in her bum.

That's what I hear.

- She f***ed Putin?

- That's what I heard.

She wasn't working.

She just did that.

Okay, all right.

- Ever heard of the Dalai Lama?

- Yeah.

Relax, she's f***ed

a lot of old dudes in the ass.

- Okay, all right, all right.

- Everywhere. Mao.

Now leave it alone.

- In the face.

- Okay, all right, leave it.

Voil.

That's French.

Am I smaller

than everyone else is?

And there's a column

in the middle.

Yeah, well,

it's 'cause it's your first day.

And you're a f***ing loser.

Who the hell is this guy?

His background data file

is corrupted. I can't open it.

Call Susan in Human Resources.

Have her send some guy down

with a hard copy

of his file.

- You call Susan.

- You call her.

- You call her. You call her.

- You call her.

Just be a man and call her.

- I think you're afraid of her.

- I think you're afraid of her too.

Well, no sh*t.

She freaks me out.

I'll call her.

Thank you, Neil.

I'll tell you right now,

Empress is planning something.

She's been talking to Corporate.

I know that.

What does that even mean?

I just don't trust her.

Safe House went south.

Corporate's livid. That's a big deal.

Well, Safe House

wasn't our fault.

The outside hire screwed it

and we're not to blame.

I say we watch her

and we watch Alpha Team.

I got a bad feeling

about this.

You sure that's just

the DTs talking?

I'm still drunk,

so it can't be the DTs.

There you go.

You corrected me.

Excuse me, Tower.

Do you know where

the meeting is today?

You're bewilderment level

is here.

It should come down

to there.

Cool?

Putin?

- What? What are you talking about?

- You slept with Putin?

Really?

Is this who you've become?

- Go to hell.

- Oh, really?

- I thought I knew you.

- We don't exactly work at Walmart.

Deception comes

with the territory and plus,

what the f***

do you think you're doing here?

- What am I doing here?

- Is this your plan?

Is this some kind

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