Over The Hedge Page #2
this whole hedge situation is about.
You see, what was once mere wilderness
is now 54 acres of man-made,
manicured, air-conditioned paradise.
Except for that little-bitty speck.
You are here.
No, no, that's a good thing.
You're hibernators, right?
You gather food,
store it for the winter?
- We fill the log!
- Hammy.
Really? This log? This cave-like log?
- All the way to the top.
- Ozzie.
Let me ask ya, how long's it take?
- You know, to fill the log?
- Two hundred and seventy-four days.
- Ever done it in a week?
- That's impossible.
Not if we work together.
You've got the food gathering skills,
I've got the know-how,
- and they have the food!
- How much food?
Loads of food. Heaps of food.
Food out the wazoo!
Well, whatever kind of food
comes out of a wazoo,
I don't think
we're interested in eating.
I don't know,
the guy's making a lot of sense to me.
- Yeah, I'm OK with wazoo food there.
No, you're not. The tail is tingling.
- Why didn't you say so?
- Hold on, hold on. The what is what?
When something doesn't feel right,
my tail tingles. Let me tell you,
everything you've said so far
is driving my tail crazy.
Listen. Verne, right? This isn't
something you need to be afraid of.
Well, I am. And for good reason.
This is not a birthmark.
That's because you
went over there without a guide.
Thanks for stopping by.
We're not interested.
Not interested in the most
delicious food you've ever tasted?
- No!
- Oome on.
Not interested!
OK. I get it.
I understand. This is something
that you're just not open to.
Whoa!
- Oh, my!
- Jeepers.
What is that?
That, my friend, is a magical
combination of corn flour,
dehydrated cheese solids,
BHA, BHT and good old MSG,
a.k.a., the chip. Nacho cheese flavor.
- Over here! Toss me one of those!
- More please! More.
Yeah, Verne, those were good!
It's all good.
And we're going over there. Tonight!
Yeah!
Welcome to suburbia.
Welcome to suburbia.
- Wow!
- Look at that!
Hey, Mom, look at us! Look at us!
Oh, my! Hon, look at this.
Jeepers.
How's that tail, Verne?
Listen, if anybody in this family
gets hurt, I'm holding you responsible.
They're having a good time.
I'll take responsibility for that.
- This is neat.
- Look at that.
- Hey, Spike, look at that.
- Hey, Verno,
I took a few clippings out of my quills
to do a little comparison.
Look at this, the grass
seems to be greener over here.
Verne, are you certain
you came to the same place?
Yeah, 'cause the raccoon says...
OK, enough about him. I get it.
So he can do a couple of tricks. I mean,
it's not like he can walk on water.
Hey, everybody! This way to the food!
- That thing's huge!
- What is that?
That is an SUV.
Humans ride around in it
because they are slowly
losing their ability to walk.
- Jeepers, it's so big!
- How many humans fit in there?
Usually? One.
Hi, this is Gladys Sharp.
Your president?
Of the homeowner's association? Right.
- Jeepers.
- What is that?
Easy, easy, don't worry.
That's just a human being.
And they are just as scared of us
as we are of them.
Now, if a human does
happen to see you, just lay down,
roll over and give your privates
a good licking. They love it.
The charter, which you signed, says
the grass is supposed to be two inches,
and according to my measuring stick,
yours is 2.5.
Oould we just get the food and go?
Really, do they have it or not?
Didn't you see it? It was in the box.
They've always got food with them.
We eat to live, these guys live to eat.
Let me show you what I'm talking about.
The human mouth is called a "pie hole."
The human being
is called a "couch potato."
That is a device to summon food.
That is one of the many voices of food.
That is the portal
for the passing of the food.
That is one of the many
food transportation vehicles.
Humans bring the food, take the food,
ship the food, they drive the food,
they wear the food! That gets
the food hot. That keeps the food cold.
That... I'm not sure what that is.
What do you know? Food!
That is the altar
where they worship food.
That's what they eat
when they eat too much.
That gets rid of guilt
so they can eat more food.
Food! Food! Food! Food!
Food!
So you think they have enough?
Well, they don't.
For humans, enough is never enough!
And what do they do
with the stuff they don't eat?
They put it in gleaming, silver cans,
just for us.
Sweetjeepers.
Dig in!
- Good, isn't it?
- OK.
- Wow.
- Share there, everyone, share.
That's a diaper.
And that does come out of a wazoo.
So, what do you think?
Was I right or was I right?
And these things are just the scraps!
Wait'll you see what comes
in the boxes, packages and cans!
I'm telling you, stick with me,
and in one week
we will gather enough food to...
- To feed a bear.
- What?
Just a figure of speech.
Halt! Intruders! Intruders!
Get out, all of you.
What is it, baby?
- What are you doing?
- You said to lick our...
No! Nix that! Run!
- Run!
- Get outta here!
Run!
- Shoo!
- To the hedge!
Get out of here!
I just mopped this patio!
Filthy vermin!
Verne's right, that was horrible.
- You kids OK?
- Stay close.
- We'll find other food, right?
- See? That's what I was talking about!
These humans don't want us around.
So we scared her,
and she overreacted. No biggie.
No biggie?
That is what we call a biggie.
Oome on, think about the food.
It was worth it for that food, huh?
That stuff is to die for!
Let me rephrase that.
No, to die for. You nailed that part.
Look, maybe our little forest life
looks primitive to a guy with a bag.
- What?
- But I think I speak
for the whole family
when I say we want nothing
to do with anything
that's over that hedge.
- Oh, come on!
- I'm done.
You haven't even tried doughnuts yet!
You wanna store fat?
That is the way to store some fat.
You'll be sweatin' through the winter!
- We'll eat the bark, right?
- OK, all right, you guys sleep on it!
Good idea.
I'm gonna check back with you.
Shoot!
Almost had 'em.
- Good night, Heather.
- Good night.
- Good night, Ozzie.
- Good night.
- Good night, Lou.
- Good night.
- Night, Penny.
- Good night.
- Good night, Hammy.
- Good night.
- Night, Bucky.
- Good night.
- Good night, Spike.
- Good night, Uncle Verne.
- Good night, Quillo.
- Night, Uncle Verne.
When we wake up,
only 273 days left till winter.
- That's enough, Verne.
- Good night, 273.
Spuddies...
Oooler... Wagon... Redder wagon.
Time's up, RJ.
But I have six more days! No!
OK. Four paws, fur.
Still alive, still alive.
So, what are you saying?
You want me to take 'em to his house?
- No.
- Then what are you saying?
Jimmy was pushing me on the bus.
- He likes you.
- No way, he's a creep.
Next time he shoves you, beat him up.
Yes!
OK, kids, dive in. There it is.
Bark for breakfast!
- I want a doughnut!
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"Over The Hedge" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Dec. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/over_the_hedge_15449>.
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