Over The Hedge Page #3

- I want pizza.

No, you don't.

OK. This is great.

Granted, it takes some time to chew.

But that...

That was very satisfying.

And, by the way,

lots of fiber in there too.

- Lots.

- I gotta admit, that does look tasty.

What are you doing here?

I'm here to help you with your...

foraging thing.

Look, Verne, you said a word

yesterday about your little gang here.

It starts with an F,

do you remember what it was?

- Family?

- Right, right, that.

You know, that got me right here.

You see, Verne,

I used to have all of that.

My own place, surrounded by loved ones,

universal remote.

But then all that went away with...

...the weed hacker incident.

Oh, God.

Oh, come here.

Yeah, that feels good, doesn't it?

- Oh, brother.

- Jeepers, Verne.

We could always use

the extra hand there, you know.

The weed hacker, Verne.

The weed hacker.

OK.

Not your problem. I'll just go.

This is me...

...going.

- Been nice.

- Don't hit.

Really nice getting to know you.

Hey, I'm sure I'll see you

around the forest.

- Take care.

- All right, all right.

Hey, RJ?

You can... you can stay.

- Oome here, ya big lug!

- No.

I knew beneath this hard,

crispy outside

there was a soft,

nougat-y center in there.

- Do you mind if I call you Uncle Verne?

- With every bone in my body.

Great. Hey, can I work with Hammy?

Wanna help me find my nuts?

Very tempting, Hammy, very tempting.

But first, I want to show you this.

You like this cookie?

- Well, this cookie's junk!

- I like a cookie.

Easy, easy. Don't worry.

I know where we can get

some cookies so valuable

that they are hand delivered

by uniformed officers.

- The Doyles' is the yellow house.

- They only ordered one box.

- The Doyles' is the yellow house.

- They only ordered one box.

There they are.

America's most coveted cookies.

Love Handles, Skinny Mints,

Neener Neeners and Smackeroons.

And guess what? They're all yours!

Whoa, Hamilton. Hold on there, fella.

I love your energy,

but you can't take 'em.

- You said they're mine.

- They will be,

if we successfully marry your

manic energy to my brilliant plan!

- You with me, kid?

- I... I... I...

The I's have it! Let's ride.

Mrs. Johansson

was allergic to chocolate.

- Really?

- Yeah, if she eats it,

- her face explodes or something.

- That is, like, so unfair.

- Wait, wait. How many boxes of?

- Hey!

You stay away from those cookies.

They're mine!

This guy's not coming, is he?

I don't want him to.

Oh, we have so much work to do.

Oome on, step into my office.

Now, listen up.

What we're going for here is

a vicious, man-eating, rabid squirrel.

- Oan you handle that?

- Excuse me?

Yes... Hammy.

OK. Rabbits aren't vicious.

They're all cute and cuddly, so...

Rabid, not rabbit.

Oh... What?

OK. So first we're gonna muss the hair.

That's looking good.

All right, now we're gonna...

We're gonna mat the fur a little bit.

A little puff on the tail...

Stop it! Puffier.

Liking that a lot.

Show me that wild look in your eye.

Oome on!

- I can burp my ABOs! A, B, O.

- Hammy!

I just really need you

to focus right now, OK?

- OK.

- Thank you.

Let's see. There we... Hang on a minute.

Not that, not that. No, no.

Nice!

Hammy?

Done! Now, come on.

I'll be right behind you.

Go on, get out there. Shoo, shoo!

I am a crazy rabid squirrel!

I want my cookies!

I'm rabid! I'm foaming at the mouth.

I'm foaming, very scary rabid squirrel.

Rabies!

- Hey, it's working!

- Behind you!

I know. You're right behind me...

Got it! Stand back!

- No, no, no, no! Oh, no!

- Take that!

- Walk it off! Walk that one off!

- What's going on? Is that Hammy?

- Everything's under control. Go back.

- You call that under control?

- He's under attack!

- He's working!

- I'm coming, Hammy!

- Verne! No!

What are you doing? Watch out!

- Hold still! I got it! Stay still.

- Help me! Get off of me!

- Yuck!

- Gross!

- Nasty!

- Oh, my God, this is so gross!

Verne!

That was great!

You, my friend, are a natural.

Or, should I say, au naturel.

Hammy, you were awesome, my man!

You had me scared. I was about to come

out and beat you with a book myself.

You're all right, aren't ya?

Of course you are. You are Hammy!

Those bruises are gonna heal.

You know what? Ohicks dig scars.

- There!

- Over there!

That's where the squirrel attacked us!

He has rabies or something.

There was this gross,

naked, amphibian thing.

- Reptile.

- It's OK, girls.

Go inside, have a cookie,

turn on the TV and calm down.

Thanks, Mom.

I'm sorry, Janis, did I

just hear them say "rabid squirrel"?

I think they mightjust be overreacting.

What if they're not? What if we have

a potential pandemic on our hands?

Vermin running loose, spreading disease

and lowering our property values?

Yeah. I have a casserole

in the oven. Gotta run.

Fine. Worry about your casserole,

and I'll worry about the end

of suburban peace and tranquility!

That's right. Don't push.

Plenty for everybody.

Got a box right over here for ya,

Penny.

That is good. Eat up! Anything that

tastes this good has to be good for you.

Feel buzzing in the back of your skull?

That's called a sugar rush.

It's what keeps humans going, why they

don't hibernate. Add a little of this,

and what usually takes you

all summer will take us a week.

I like it! I like it!

Hold on, Hamsquad.

The last thing you need is caffeine.

That's right. Oome on, dig in.

Because this, my friends,

is just the beginning.

What?

- Up, down! Up, down!

- He's getting away!

Oh, yeah!

Read it and weep.

Hello? I need every business listing

you have under "exterminator."

Ozzie!

- Whoa, Mom! You hit a possum.

- Oh, my goodness.

Do you think it's dead?

Oh, no.

- Wow!

- Touch it.

- Oan I poke him?

- No!

These poor little creatures.

- What's going on?

- Oome check it out.

Debbie? I don't remember seeing

a permit app for a gathering.

Groups of more than one

who wish to get...

Timmy, get the shovel from the car.

Lights fading, limbs growing cold.

- I see a tunnel.

- Oh, no.

Mother, is that you

beckoning me into the light?

Must move toward the light.

- What do you think he's doing?

- Maybe we knocked his brains loose.

You went too far.

Let's get out of here and leave this...

This...

- Nice catch, Verne.

- Yes! Yes!

- You're dangerous. You're insane!

- Sweet music, I'm going home!

Goodbye, cruel world!

Rosebud.

- Now can I poke him?

- No!

You see? This is exactly why

I called the exterminator.

To kill them

before they get hurt like this.

Everybody, get out of here right now!

Right! Kids, grab those handles.

Get the stuff.

- What?

- Here we go. I threw out my back.

- Let's go.

- Get down.

Oh, no.

I believe someone phoned

about an animal problem?

The solution is standing before you.

Dwayne LaFontant is here.

Where have you been? I'm throwing

a "Welcome to the Neighborhood" party,

and so far Debbie's car has killed

more animals than you have.

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