Pagafantas

---

The cobra, with its intimidating

appearance and deadly bite,

is famous for its defense mechanism

when faced with danger.

If attacked,

it adopts an upright posture,

repelling the attacker.

But this defense mechanism

is not exclusive to this reptile.

It is also used by human beings

as protection against attack.

That is why

this movement is called

"doing the cobra".

Calculations by experts

on the subject

show that every two minutes

someone somewhere does the cobra.

This means that as of now

the next one will occur

in 1 minute 56 seconds.

I know who she is.

It doesn't matter.

- She's dating Perianes' brother.

- Pitu?

But we're just talking.

They've been dating for years.

Let's go home.

No, wait.

- Is that rum and cola?

- Yeah.

What are you doing?

Go away.

Hey, man!

Well!

Didn't you leave?

- I was over there.

- I thought...

Were you cut up about...?

No, no, don't worry.

Did she end it, or did you?

We'd been dating for five years

and I needed a bit of...

But I've got nothing against

long relationships.

I've been with someone for ages too.

Pitu, maybe you know him.

Pitu?

No, I don't think I do.

We split up last month.

You did?

I'm really sorry.

How are you coping?

- I'm doing really great.

- Yeah?

I needed time with my girlfriends,

to go partying,

to be with whoever I want,

and with no complications.

I'm just the same.

I don't want any complications.

I'm really simple.

My one good point is

I never complicate anyone's life.

Your drink.

Thanks.

Don't you drink?

No, it disagrees with me.

There are different types

of cobra,

some more aggressive than others.

- This one's bound to be open.

- I think I'll head home.

I'm glad the other place closed.

They kept playing "Hroes del

Silencio". I hate Enrique Bunbury.

- You know I do, Rubn.

- Yeah, yeah.

You can't be called Enrique

and have the surname Bunbury.

Enrique or Bunbury,

but not both.

He's from f***ing Saragossa!

He turns the girls on.

What girls?

Have you seen those girls?

And, as well,

that whole loutish routine.

Forty years old

and acting like a lout,

with those f***ing rats tails

hanging over his face.

- This place is closed.

- He's a pain.

He thinks he's Bob Dylan

or somebody like that.

No, it has to be open.

There's a light on.

That's the cigarette machine.

- I mean the red light.

- Yeah, it says Lucky Strike.

Maybe there's a bell.

A bell at "Tito's"? Why?

It's closed.

It looks empty, because of

the fines, but inside it's jumping.

People don't go out on weekdays.

With all the noise

they can't hear us.

I'm going home.

I've got class tomorrow.

What do you mean, going home?

One last drink,

it's not even midnight.

Where can we go on a Wednesday?

Come on,

Wednesday is the new Friday.

I thought the new Friday

was Thursday.

No, no way, man.

Everyone goes out on a Thursday.

In fact, Thursday

is the new Saturday.

So what's Saturday?

If Wednesday's the new Friday,

and Thursday's the new Saturday,

what's Saturday?

Don't make silly excuses.

If you want to go home, go ahead.

Wait, no, no.

Have you talked

to Ana?

She rang me.

So we aren't...

You mean, going out mid-week

and that?

"And that"?

You left her so you could

go out more, and now you say that?

No, you kept on at me to leave Ana.

I was happy with her.

You weren't so happy with Ana.

We've been doing this for two

months and haven't scored once.

And those German tourists?

They were 50 years old.

Yeah, but...

No, they weren't well preserved

and you know that.

Maybe we shouldn't have left

Ana and Elisa.

What? No, don't go there, Rubn.

If you want to back out,

that's fine with me.

Do what you want,

but don't mess me up.

I'll keep on going out,

even if it's on my own.

Right now, I'm going to go out

like crazy, whatever you say.

- Where are you going?

- To that old bar we used to go to.

It's a fruit store now.

Ana said Elisa wants to talk to you.

Yeah? Well, she can tell her

I'm doing great.

Lots of guys would like to be

like me, I feel f***ing great.

Jose Mari, come on, you're late.

You see?

- You have to kick the leg.

- That doesn't work.

Like that. Come on.

- Where's my red jacket?

- In your... In Miss Begoa's room.

You unpacked my boxes?

The sitting room

was full of your stuff.

It's temporary.

You mean the cotton jacket?

The red one I always wear.

The cotton one.

It was really old.

- You threw it out?

- That must be uncle Jaime.

What's he doing here?

He isn't even my uncle.

He's giving you a job.

You didn't ask me

if I wanted one.

You have to work.

I know nothing about photos.

But are you happy?

That's what matters.

Coming!

Morning, Jaime.

- Have you had breakfast?

- Yes.

Well, I'm ready.

You can have these later.

They're croissants.

Look, Jose Mari,

you love croissants.

I made them myself.

I'd no yeast, I used bicarbonate

so they'd rise, like an omelet.

They taste the same,

but after the third

you get awful wind...

Try one.

No, let's get going.

Yeah, if we're late

the boss'll fire us.

No, silly, I'm the boss.

Well, I'll give you a call later.

You look really pretty today.

Thank you, Jaime.

We'll see how the first day goes.

I bet you'll sell loads.

Don't be like that,

he's doing you a favor.

He's doing it for you.

Don't be silly.

Why would he do that for me?

The albums are here.

For every two rolls developed,

an album with a leather trim

or a methacrylate frame

The frame is cheaper.

OK. And the memory cards?

There'll be people

asking for them, right?

Why would they want a memory?

For digital cameras.

Look.

It's your mother.

Could you ever get that quality

with a digital camera?

Your mother's very pretty,

and I say that with all respect,

but try taking a photo like that

with a digital camera.

You'll get rubbish!

But people buy digital cameras.

People buy drugs too,

but I don't sell heroin.

One thing I hate doing

is giving advice,

but I'll tell you this.

Forget about digital cameras,

they won't catch on.

All those megapixil and stuff.

Does anyone know what

a megapixil is? Do you? No.

- They're colored dots...

- Neither do it. We don't need to.

People who buy digital cameras

will realize that

and they'll flock here.

Just you wait.

Will you take this down

to the garbage?

I'll do it tomorrow.

They're Miss Begoa's

incontinence pads, they smell.

It'll just take a minute.

- Wait!

- Sh*t!

When I threw in the garbage

I dropped my keys in here.

- Don't you have a spare set?

- No, I've just moved.

Have you got a lighter?

The truck will be here soon.

Maybe you can...

Wait, here they are!

- As you're in there...

- Will you help me out?

No, hang on.

Can you hand me that red jacket,

with the hood?

It's mine.

I threw it out by accident.

Thanks.

Want anything else?

There's a box

with some cookies in it.

It was a joke.

Disgusting!

- I'm Claudia.

- Chema.

I'd give you a kiss

but I stink.

I can put up with that.

- Really?

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes