Paper Man Page #5

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one that wouId taIk to you

for a long time?

- l know, but

- He doesn't love you.

lf that's what you think,

you're wrong.

- What do you want me to say?

- l could so move

to California.

You shouldn't just assume

l'll always be around,

'cause one day

maybe l won't

- Stop it

- ls that what you want?

- l don't have much of a story,

do I?

- lt's all relative, l suppose.

- Exactly.

Other people seem

to have had events.

Things have happened to them,

life-altering occurrences.

- l used to do things.

Remember?

- This isn't about you.

- Amazing things.

[inhales deeply]

What do you want me to say?

- l don't know.

- No, no, no, no.

Tell me what you want me to say,

IiteraIIy,

'cause, frankly, at this point,

l got nothing.

- [whispering]

- But you have touched

several lives, Richard,

through your work.

lt's not about your happiness

but the happiness you've brought

to others.

[phone ringing]

[answering machine beeps]

- Hey, look,

it's the fund-raiser

for the children's hospital

tomorrow night.

And l was thinking of donating

that bottle of wine,

the '71 Chteau Petrus.

l know we were saving it

for a special occasion,

but, well,

it's for a good cause.

So what do you think?

[phone ringing]

[machine beeps]

Richard, did you drink

that wine,

that $5,000 bottle of wine?

lt's not in the rack.

lt was for the children.

Will you call me, please?

[tape crackling]

[knocking at door]

- Come in.

- Whoa.

Check out the couch.

- You like?

- [laughs]

- l made it with these.

- All right!

That's awesome.

- Yeah, sit

sit, sit, sit, sit, sit

- Uh!

- Huh?

- lt's nice.

- Oh, those

just ideas for titIes.

- For your new book?

- Mm-hmm.

- Cool, what have you got?

- Uh...

Cloudscape,

Death and Desolation,

The Daffodil.

- [laughs]

- Memoirs of an Amnesiac,

Bolero.

- Bolero?

- Okay.

Ad Nauseam,

Balm of Silence.

No?

Old Miss Ptarmigan's

Blackberry Wine?

- Whoa.

- Let's forget it

Titles are impossible.

[paper crinkling]

- Paper Man.

[laughs softly]

- You seem a lot more

interesting than me.

- l'm not

It just seems that way

because l have a dead sister.

[door creaking]

- Where you been all day?

- l don't know.

- Whatever.

So the party's off this weekend.

Turner's mom busted him.

- So what about the cove?

- lt's f***ing cold out there.

- Big deal.

So the party's off.

- What kind of party?

- What do mean

"What kind of party?"

A f***ing party.

- Just nothing.

Just some friends hanging out

- You could use my place.

- What?

- Seriously?

- Yeah, why not?

This weekend's not so good.

My wife's back.

But you know,

we could do next week.

Friday?

- Friday is cool.

- Really?

- Yeah, l'll get a keg.

- Nice!

Nice.

- What else do you guys need?

Appetizers, you know,

paper plates and stuff?

- No, no, no.

We're okay.

We've got it covered.

- Great, we're on.

- Righteous.

Thanks, man.

- You didn't have to do that

- Ah, it'll be fun.

[slurping]

- Richard!

Richard?

Richard, please.

- Hi.

- [booming voice]

When the world is in peril,

when evil surrounds you,

when dange

[door slams]

Okay.

- Richard, help me.

- You don't like it?

- All the furniture is outside.

And what the hell is this?

- You seem disappointed,

going off your body language.

- You don't pick up the phone

once this week.

You don't call me once.

l drive all the way out here,

and there's this.

Richard, say something.

- [stammering]

- [sighs]

What's this?

- What's what?

- This.

Whose is this?

- Will you just tell her?

- Claire?

- Yes?

- Are we unhappy,

or are we just pretending

to be unhappy?

- What do you mean?

- Are we just pretending

to be unhappy

to add drama to our lives

so that we seem somehow

more substantial?

l mean, think about it

Our lives

are embarrassingly easy.

We've got plenty of money.

We got friends.

Well, you've got friends.

There are people out there

who have real problems,

you know,

real reasons to be unhappy.

l mean, l could be a coal miner

dying of black lung

or something.

You could be a Cincinnati

crack whore on food stamps.

- What?

- l don't know.

Doesn't it feel like

we're faking it,

our unhappiness?

- No.

No, it's real.

lt's very real.

l'm going home now.

l think you think

this is still charming.

We're not 23 anymore.

You need to pull it together.

Pick up the phone this week.

[door unlatching]

And bring the f***ing furniture

in from the Iawn.

[door slams]

- Norwood regarded his solitude

as something

Norwood, Norman, Richmond?

Richmond, Richmond.

- Richmond regarded his solitude

as something

Ew!

Richmond.

Hitchmond.

Shmichmond.

[crashing]

- Richmond regarded his solitude

as something...

- Unbearable!

- Richmond regarded his

- Unbearable!

- Richmond regarded his solitude

as something unbearabIe.

- Ptoo!

[bicycle squeaking]

[knocking at window]

Come on.

Scalpel.

- No, you're starting too high.

You need to go down at the base

of the chin.

- Oh.

And then cut up from there.

Good.

Careful, careful, careful.

[laughs]

Let me help you.

All right

Ready?

- Yeah.

- And there.

Good, good, good, good.

Okay, would you rather

always walk backwards

or stub your toe every time

you took a step?

- Why would l want to do either?

- lt's a game.

Just pick one.

- Ah!

- Oh, drop that in the pan.

[sizzling]

Beautiful.

You are really good at this.

- My wife reattached

a Ieg today.

- Oh.

- Maybe l should have been

a fishmonger.

l could have, you know,

mongered some fish.

- Okay, which one is it?

ls it walk backwards

or stub your toe?

- Well, could l just design

a special kind of shoe

- Mm-mm. No.

Oh, wait Here.

Flip that in a minute.

Gently, gently, gently.

- I guess I wouId

walk backwards.

l'm not good with pain.

You?

- l like to see where l'm going.

Okay, come here.

You hold this end.

- Ahh, paper men.

- You know, for your book.

- Oh, yes!

Oh.

l got something for you too.

Yeah, close your eyes.

- Oh!

A camel.

A peacock.

- lt's the swan,

the beautiful, graceful swan.

- Oh, sorry.

[laughs]

Aw.

- And I know

what it means to you

And I know

what it means to you

And I know

who l want to be

[knocking at door]

- Come in.

- Whoa.

Oh.

- We look good.

- Yeah.

Wow.

You really went all out

- Yeah, too much?

- No, mm-mm.

No, it looks great

Party town.

- Mm-hmm, the keg's in here.

And l put the hors d'oeuvres

in the kitchen.

l think it will flow well

that way.

- Yeah, oh.

That's a piata.

- Yeah, l went for the donkey.

You know, go classic.

- [laughs]

You don't reaIIy

do parties much, do you?

- No, l'm a little nervous.

- [laughs]

Well, relax.

lt will be fun.

- Okay.

- [laughs]

No.

Hey.

- Hey.

- Sh*t

- Yeah, l know.

- Where's the freak?

- Don't be an a**hole.

- What a dickweed.

- Hey, Bryce.

What's up, man?

[laughs]

- Where do l put these?

- Kitchen.

- What about the box?

- Whatever, man.

Whatever feels right, you know.

Mi casa, you know.

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