Perfect Strangers Page #6

- Good thing he was harmless.

- What the f*** ?

- I can explain.

- It says, "I feel like screwing" !

- It could be predictive text.

- Shut the f*** up.

- Let me explain.

- Go on then.

Ivano's in a relationship

with this girl, it's all about sex.

Well, it is for her but he's in love,

but won't admit it

and he's suffering like a dog.

- That's why he called the vet.

- Well ?

Well ?

Why's he texting you ?

I don't know what's so funny.

What's so funny ?

- I tell you what, he can explain.

- No, there's really no need.

Please, there's nothing to explain.

It's pointless, just stop.

- All right ?

- Quiet everyone.

Hey, thanks for calling.

l'm sorry to be a pain, Bianca.

- Did she call you ?

- Yes.

- And ?

- She asked me over.

- Don't go.

- l can't help myself.

- She gets to me, l want to go.

- But she'll only hurt you.

- l'm hurting enough as it is.

- It'll be worse ifyou go.

- Some help you are !

- At least I'm trying to help.

Otherwise don't bother calling,

you know what I think.

- What a pain ! Bye.

- Bye... Ivano !

- Don't go there !

- Okay... bye.

- Satisfied ?

- How often do you talk ?

- Now and then.

- How often is now and then ?

- Every time he wants to...

- I get it.

He panics and calls me.

Give him Eva's number,

he needs a therapist, not an ex.

- Guys, the meatloaf's ready.

- Unbelievable !

- Why didn't you tell me you talk ?

- Because it's not important.

- There's nothing to tell.

- You say we should share everything.

Everything that's important

for our relationship.

- I think he still wants to screw you.

- And that seems very important.

- Don't be silly !

- Yeah, don't be silly.

- I don't talk to my exes.

- No, they'd prefer you dead.

If it bothers you, I'll call him

and tell him not to call any more.

- Right, you tell him.

- Then Cosimo is happy

and you can speak to Ivano in secret.

If I tell Cosimo I won't talk to him,

then I won't.

Why shouldn't you talk to him ?

He's a friend, Cosimo should trust you.

I trust her, but I can't stand him.

Alright ?

- Doesn't Ivano have a house in Anzio ?

- Yes, that's why she wanted to go.

Yes, of course !

- Does he really have a house there ?

- You really are crazy !

- I don't even know him !

- I'm not in the mood, Lele.

I can see that.

- It's Sofia.

- Answer it.

- Hello, darling. Are you okay ?

- Hi, dad. Yes, l'm fine.

- Can you talk ?

- Yes, of course. Go ahead.

l don't know how to tell you this,

but Gregorio's parents are away.

And he's asked me to go...

to sleep there.

Dad, are you still there ?

- And what did you say ?

- l don't know, l want to.

But l wasn't expecting it tonight.

lf l don't go, he might be upset.

What shall l do ?

Don't go just because he'd be upset.

That can't be the only reason.

Of course it's not...

And don't expect me

to be enthusiastic about it.

Come on, dad...

But there is something

I want to say.

This is an important moment,

something you'll remember all your life.

It's notjust something

to tell your friends tomorrow.

Ifyou think that later...

whenever you look back on it,

it'll make you smile...

then go ahead.

But ifyou don't feel like it,

ifyou're not sure,

then forget about it.

Because you have plenty of time.

- Do you know what ?

- What ?

- Never mind.

- No, tell me.

You embarrassed me today

when you gave me those condoms.

l didn't know where to look.

I didn't tell you to use them.

Why then ? l think you knew,

you have a sixth sense.

You've never done it before.

Anyway...

lf l do go to Gregorio's,

tell mom l'm at Chicca's.

- Why don't you tell her ?

- What ?

- The truth.

- Are you crazy ?

- I've told you to talk to her.

- You know what she's like.

She never listens, just gets angry.

- Have a little bit of patience.

- A lot of patience.

Okay, a lot of patience.

But I think it's worth a try.

Try it.

You're too in love with mom

to see what a b*tch she is.

- Okay, l have to go. Thanks.

- Sofia...

You did really well.

The therapy must be working.

Bianca...

- Did you tell her ?

- No.

- You told her.

- Okay, but I only told her.

- And I only told Peppe.

- And I... Only Lele.

- And Lele kept it to himself.

- She's my wife...

She's my best friend.

- Sorry...

- Don't be.

He's seeing a therapist,

not a whore ! Come on !

Right...

There's the frog again.

- Lucio wants you to answer him.

- Why's he insisting ?

Answer him, then he might stop.

Perhaps I'd better,

or he won't leave me alone.

"I'm having dinner with friends,

we'll talk tomorrow."

Let's see if he sends another...

"We've decided

to reveal our private business."

No, we can't...

He wrote "jerk".

- Damn.

- How dare he ?

You'll have to explain this.

- Explain what ?

- You don'tjust call someone a jerk.

In fact he's an oaf,

he's bad-mannered.

Would this oaf

happened to be named Lucia ?

- Don't be silly !

- Such a cheeky co-worker.

He's calling you.

Answer it, then we'll know more.

We'll find out why he's so angry.

Come on.

- Okay, on speaker, right ?

- Yes.

- Hello ?

- Why do you sound so glum ?

l thought you said you had a fever ?

Then why did you go out ?

Have you nothing to say ?

You're a jerk. You know what ?

You can't make a decision,

you don't know what you want in life.

You don't even know if you like

men or women.

So f*** off !

This guy's off his rocker...

I would never have thought it. But...

You must be crazy !

You don't think I'm...

No, he's a co-worker who's gay...

and he's obsessed with me, that's all.

Stop messing around, okay.

Carlotta ?

- Carlotta, no messing around.

- Why didn't you tell me ?

He's a co-worker...

Rocco, you tell her.

- Cosimo, come on !

- He's a co-worker who...

- He's a co-worker.

- You see ?

Have you been with him ?

- What ?

- Have you been with him ? Simple.

Have I been with who ?

He's a co-worker who's in love with me

and he's convinced

I'm in love with him.

Yes, because fags

think everyone else is a fag.

- An elegant analysis.

- Sorry, it came out all wrong, but...

The concept is the same.

- What are you talking about ?

- Rocco's right, sort of.

I want to know ifyou've been

with this Lucio. Yes or no ?

Carlotta... Geez !

Come on !

We've been together for 10 years.

We have two wonderful children.

- You should know me.

- Maybe not well enough.

What do you mean ?

Say something to her !

Carlotta, look at me.

Darling, look at me.

Can you imagine me with a man ?

Like this, eyes straight ahead ?

Can you imagine me like that ?

Can you ?

Though there's no harm in that.

I'm just saying that...

because I have other tastes,

and you know that.

Carlotta...

I promise you, between me and...

- Lucio.

- Lucio... nothing's ever happened.

I swear.

It's Lucio.

He says he misses your kisses.

Is he a fag then ?

- Guys, how can I explain...

- There's nothing to explain.

Don't you start now.

What's wrong ?

What's wrong ? Nothing.

I'm fine. Are you ?

Yes, I'm fine.

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