Pillow Talk Page #2

You disagree?

- No, it might work.

I hope so. We have to share

this line for at least another month.

We have to try

living with one another.

Well?

I was waiting

for an off-color remark from you.

Is that all you have on your mind?

Never mind my mind.

You keep to your half-hour, I to mine.

He makes pretty good sense.

Were you listening in again?

- Yes.

Have you no shame?

- No, he's improved many a day for me.

What made such good sense?

- Worse than a woman living alone

is one saying she likes it.

- I do like it.

I have a good job, a lovely apartment,

I go out with nice men,

to the theater, the best restaurants.

What am I missing?

When you have to ask, believe me,

you're missing it.

What's a girl to do? Ask the first man

she meets to come home with her?

No, not that.

lt don't work.

Bedroom problems.

Bedroom problems?

Bedroom problems.

Over here, please.

Just set it down here.

No, the other way.

Thank you.

How's it look?

You look beautiful.

- Jonathon, now really,

do you like it or ...

- Whatever you like, I like.

Jan, why won't you marry me?

- Jonathon, I don't love you.

That's absurd.

I'm young, rich, and healthy.

And I'm very good-looking.

I've got everything.

- lncluding 3 ex-wives.

Oh, that's what it is.

Oon't hold it against me. I was just

revolting against my mother with them.

I'm trying to work it out

why I dislike her so.

I've been in therapy for 2 years now.

- And? - It's perfectly healthy.

He dislikes her as much as I do,

and he's from Vienna.

We'll go to Mexico.

I've never been married in Mexico.

I just don't love you.

- How do you know?

Love isn't an opinion,

it's a chemical reaction.

We've never even kissed.

They didn't hit

the moon with the first shot either.

Oh Jonathon.

I guess that's what I want.

To hit the moon.

Well ...

- I'll tell you what,

let's have dinner

and we can try another countdown.

Can't do it. I have a

housewarming for one of our clients.

I'll call you tomorrow.

If I can ever get through.

Call between the half-hour and hour.

- Why?

I arranged a cease-fire.

- Marry me. You'll get tons of lines!

I'd better leave.

That could sweep a girl off her feet.

Hi, Alma.

Any calls?

Shhh. It's him.

Mr. Allen, you're on my half-hour.

Party pooper.

Hello?

- Never do that again.

We had an agreement.

You were on my time.

So I overlapped by a few minutes.

What can I do when someone calls me?

Be as rude as you?

Oo you have anything else to say?

- Yes. Get off my back.

Stop living vicariously

in what you think I do.

The bakery has lots of warm rolls.

Oon't press your nose to the window.

Come in, Jonathon. It's open.

- Hi, Brad.

Got any more songs ready.

- Almost.

Fine. Let's hear them.

Not now. I'm in a hurry.

I'm putting up

200,000 dollars for this show.

We've got a theater deadline.

- You're hobbing me. - Oh, am l?

I don't know. Money seems to have lost

its value these days.

With 200,000 dollars, my grandfather

cornered the wheat market.

Today, you can't scare songwriters

with it. - That's inflation for you.

Pour yourself a scotch.

Thanks.

You're prejudiced against me

because I'm part of a minority group.

What minority group?

Millionaires. You outnumber us,

but you'll never get us.

We'll fight for our rights.

And we've got the money to do it.

You sound absolutely bitter.

You don't know

what this show means to me.

We went through college together.

You worked your way through.

You're an important songwriter now.

You've had some Broadway hits.

You started out with nothing

and you've made it far.

I started out with 8 million dollars,

and I've still got 8 million dollars.

I just can't seem to get ahead.

Who's the girl?

- What girl?

Come on, you can't kid me.

I've been through 3 marriages

with you. You're like a fighter.

Only ambitious on the way to the ring.

Well, there's a girl.

Brad,

she's the sweetest, the loveliest,

the most talented person I've met.

- Like the stripper.

She was an exotic dancer.

With trained doves.

When's the happy occasion?

Well, I don't know for sure.

She claims to not want to marry me.

Note, that's

what all my wives said at first.

Mind if I call her up?

- Go ahead. What's her name? - Jan.

Jan? Who?

Jan ...

I'm not going to tell you.

I may be neurotic, but I'm not crazy.

Busy. I can never get her.

She shares it with some nut.

lt couldn't be.

Or could it?

A nut?

Some guy with a phone fetish.

She had to make a deal with him to use

the phone on alternate half-hours.

That's ridiculous.

A pretty girl?

- Yeah.

Good figure?

And you won't tell me who she is?

- That's right.

I found this goldmine. I'm not telling

an old claim-jumper who she is.

You sly dog.

Still busy.

Must be the wrong half-hour.

Brad ...

As a friend ... sit down, boy.

As a friend, I only hope one day

you find a girl like this.

You should quit chasing around,

get married. - Why? - Why?

You're not getting any younger, fella.

Sure, it's fun, it's exciting.

Oancing with a different doll

every night.

But a man has to give it up sometime.

- Why?

Because he wants to create a stable,

lasting relationship with one person.

Brad, believe me,

there's nothing so wonderful,

so fulfilling, as coming home

to the same woman every night.

Why?

- Because,

that's what an adult does.

A wife, a family, a house.

A mature man wants responsibilities.

Why? - If you want to,

you can find arguments for anything.

I've got to get going.

What do you have against marriage?

Jonathon,

before a man marries, he's ...

like a tree in the forest.

He stands there independent.

An entity unto himself.

Then he's chopped down, loses his

branches and bark. Lands in the river.

Then he's taken to the mill.

When he comes out,

he's no longer a tree.

He's the vanity table,

the breakfast nook, the baby crib,

and the newspaper

that lines the garbage can.

No, no. If this girl weren't something

special, then I'd agree with you.

But with Jan, you look forward

to losing your branches.

I've got to go.

Remember I need those songs.

- In your office on Monday. - Fine.

Hello?

- Miss Morrow. This is Brad Allen.

I've just gone through an agonizing

reappraisal of our situation.

And I'm not very proud of myself.

I've used the phone too much

and been extremely rude.

I'd like to apologize

and suggest we could get together.

For a cup of coffee, maybe.

We could get acquainted and

we might find we have a lot in common.

Mr. Allen,

we have nothing in common.

Not that meeting you

mightn't prove amusing.

But some jokes are

just too obvious to be funny.

Bradley, honey.

I've almost got it. There.

I can't believe it.

A song for little old me.

"You are my inspiration, Marie.

A perfect combination, Marie.

Your eyes,

your hair, are beyond compare.

So is it any wonder?

You captured me

and now I'm under your spell? Marie."

Oh Brad.

What a pity you have to leave so soon.

- I have an early appointment.

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