Planet 51 Page #5

See that star,

the little red one?

Circling that star is

a planet called Earth.

It's about 20 billion

miles away, give or take.

There's no way

space is that big.

What?

Are you kidding?

There's billions

of galaxies,

and each galaxy has

billions of stars.

Next to that, kid, our planets

are just dust in the wind.

So, nothing

I knew was right?

Come on.

You knew about Neera.

I mean, look at her.

Lose the antennae, get some

plastic surgery, she's a hottie.

I don't have the right stuff, like you.

Kid...

I never had

the right stuff.

I'm a button pusher,

Spam in a can.

I don't even fly the ship.

It's all automatic.

I only got this far on charm

and my rugged good looks.

You risked everything to help

a stranger from another worid.

You're the one

with the right stuff.

Get out of here.

Finally! We've been

looking for you!

Guys!

Great hiding spot.

I call the closet.

No way! Let's go

fight the army.

How's your species

at hiding?

Can you change your

skin to this color?

Your call, Captain Baker. What's

it going to be, fight or hide?

Neither.

I think Lem's saying

he wants the closet.

I'll tell you what

it's going to be.

We're gonna go get

Chuck back to his ship.

Skiff, you were right

about Base 9.

That's where

they have his ship.

But we don't

know where it is.

Yes, we do.

Rover found me. He's also

programmed to find my ship.

Wait,

where is Rover?

(SOBBING)

It's too painful

to talk about.

It's okay.

They've got him at

the comic book shop.

Well, then, we've got to go get him.

Hold on. The whole army's

looking for you two.

You can't just

stroll through town.

Wait, wait, that new movie,

doesn't that open tonight?

Yeah. Why?

(FANFARE PLAYING)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING EXCITEDLY)

The citizens of Glipforg are

undaunted by alien invaders

and are bravely going about

their normal routines.

Ow!

Got you!

There's the comic book store. Let's go.

(GASPS)

What great

costumes!

You two are finalists.

Up on stage.

Oh, uh, we're not here

to enter the contest.

Then why are you

dressed like aliens?

Uh, we're here

to win

the contest.

What? (NERVOUSLY) Yeah, good.

(WHISPERING)

Trust me. Trust me.

Mmm-hmm.

Private,

come here.

Hold your fire, soldier.

Take us to your leader.

Welcome to the Humaniacs

III Costume Contest.

We're really upset!

We're really upset!

Let's hear it

for the finalists.

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

What are we

supposed to do?

Give them their daily

minimum dose of Chuck.

Hello, Humaniacs!

#... overhead lifters and

four-barrel carbs Oh, yeah

# Greased Lightning

Go, Greased Lightning

# A fuel-injection cut-off

and chrome-plated rods Oh, yeah

# Greased Lightning

Go, Greased Lightning

Come on, Lem!

# You know you'll be a hit

When you get right into it

# Greased Lightning

# Go, Greased Lightning You're

burning up the quarter mile

(SIGHS) # Greased Lightning

Go, Greased Lightning

Look at me.

Watch this.

# Go, Greased Lightning You 're

coasting through the heat lap trial

# Greased Lightning

Go, Greased Lightning

# You are supreme

You're such a dream

Yeah! That's it!

# Greased Lightning

# Oh, yeah! Bust a

move, green machine.

# Greased Lightning, go!

(WHOOPS)

# Go, go, go

Greased Lightning

# You are supreme

# You're such a dream

# Greased Lightning #

All right!

(LAUGHING)

(SIGHS)

(WHOOPING)

(ALL GASPING)

The alien!

(ALL SCREAMING)

Lem!

Over here!

There he is!

All of these costumes! Sir,

how do we find the alien?

Simple, Captain. Like us,

the alien is in uniform.

Grab him!

I got you!

Chuck!

No! No! Get off!

(GROANS)

Okay,

keep back.

Move.

(GASPS)

Time to meet the monster face to face.

(CROWD GASPING)

Look at it, Professor.

It's hideous.

And that smell...

Hey, you try wearing the

same suit for three weeks.

What a remarkable brain

you must have.

An incisin here and here,

it should pop right out.

Huh?

No! You're making a

mistake! He's friendly!

Oh! This poor boy's

obviously a zombie.

I'll remove

his brain, too.

(GRUNTS)

(VOCALIZING) Ooh!

(MIMICKING HYPNOTIC VOICE) You

are no longer needed, slave.

I release you. Return

to your puny life.

Kid, I'm going down anyway.

There's no need

for you to come with me.

Thanks for everything.

How about it,

Professor?

Hmm.

Difficult to tell.

Do you still believe

the alien is friendly?

(SIGHS)

(SOFTLY) No.

This boy is free!

(CROWD CHEERING)

Oh, Lem! We're so glad

you're not a zombie!

What about

the alien spawn, sir?

I want it destroyed, one

little piece at a time.

All right, let's get

these aliens to Base 9!

(CROWD GASPING)

Not that it exists.

Move it!

Go on.

Get in!

We're here to honor

a young man who survived

a harrowing ordeal at the

hands of the alien monster.

Lem, come on out!

(FANFARE PLAYING)

(CROWD APPLAUDING)

Son?

Lem, I understand you'll be working

right here after you graduate,

teaching about

the mysteries of space.

Give us a preview

of what we'll learn.

(HESITANTLY) Well, we know

everything about our universe.

It's 500 miles long

500 miles!

Remarkable!

I can't.

Space isn't 500 miles.

It's not. It's so much

bigger than we can imagine.

There's billions

of galaxies,

and each galaxy has

billions of stars,

and next to that,

our planet is just...

Excuse me.

Lem?

I know I was

kind of harsh.

I'm really sorry.

Ouch!

Oh, hi, Neera.

What are you doing?

It's called hotwiring.

It's how they

start cars on Earth.

Lem, um,

I was thinking...

Well, you know, now

that this is all over...

Yeah, Neera?

Maybe we could...

(ENGINE STARTS)

(PANTING)

Lem, you left

everyone hanging!

I'm going to

go find Chuck.

But how? It's impossible without Rover!

My little Rovie.

(SOBBING) I can still hear

his wagging little antenna.

(WARBLING)

Rover?

Rover!

Rover! Rover!

You're alive!

But how did you get out?

Good going, boy!

Rover, Rover, can you find Chuck?

Where's Chuck?

You're going with me?

Mmm-hmm.

All right!

Thought you could

take over our worid?

Your kind knows

no decency.

(CHUCKLES) You mean

chick magnets?

No, aliens.

Tell us your

invasin plans!

And don't bother

taking over my mind.

If you do, Captain Kisno has

orders to shoot me.

If you take over

Captain Kisno's mind,

Lieutenant Groit has

orders to shoot him.

If you take over

Lieutenant Groit's mind,

Sergeant York will shoot Captain Kisno,

Lieutenant Groit and myself,

along with these

three soldiers.

Each man has a designated target

in the squad.

Should you succeed

in taking over all our minds,

Corporal Hisk has orders

to electrocute everyone.

If this fails, the entire base is

rigged to blow at the touch of a button.

Uh, General, sir? Am I supposed

to shoot Hecknavar or Kolski?

I shoot Kolski.

No. You shoot Meckavoy.

Well, then who

shoots Kolski?

I can shoot myself.

That won't be necessary. Hecknavar,

you shoot Kolski, Captain Kisno

and graze

Corporal Hisk.

Yes, sir!

Ow!

Not yet!

Drop your weapon!

You.

No! You first.

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