Post Grad Page #6

You know what I thought when I met you?

No.

- Aside from the incredible ears,

she's smart and stunning. -

- Absolutely stunning.

- Hmm.

But there was something else.

I just saw a girl that has the whole world

at her fingertips...

and she doesn't even know it.

Good night.

Oh, my God.

Oh, I'm such an idiot. I completely forgot.

- It's cool.

- Oh, I'm so sorry.

How was it?

Great. Fine, good... I...

And our dinner... I missed our fancy dinner.

You're getting overly worked up about this,

Ryden. It's...

It's cool.

Besides, you were clearly busy with...

Pel from across the street.

Oh, no, he... We were at work...

- and then there was this big blowup,

so we left, but it was... - Uh-huh.

Awesome. I'll see you later.

- Wait. What are you doing?

- What does it look like?

Just let me explain.

What exactly needs explanation?

The fact that I've been

waiting around like a moron...

hoping that one day you'll actually

feel about me the way I feel about you?

Or the fact that you're so obsessed

with your future...

that y-you completely forget about everyone

that you're supposed to give a sh*t about?

I'm not waiting anymore. I'm done.

I may not know exactly what my future

looks like, but I do know one thing.

You're not in it.

Oh...

...say can and will be used against

you, okay? - I didn't know they were hot.

- You have the right to an attorney.

- Bought them on the Internet.

Can't afford one, one will

be provided to you by the state.

This is so stupid. I can't...

Didn't have to be this way.

Grab your brother. Get him in the car.

Come on, honey.

Come on. Let's go get in the car.

I had absolutely nothing to do with this.

You can ask anybody,

and they'll tell you. I hate crime.

It's okay. It's okay.

The good news is your husband

doesn't have any priors.

The bad news is we're

gonna have to hold him.

Trafficking stolen

property is no small crime.

- The bail won't be set till tomorrow.

- You're keeping him overnight?

- But he's not a criminal. He's

just a moron. - That's the breaks.

I told you. I told you in

He's your son.

- And I did the best I could with

what I had. -

Yeah, well, your best effort is in jail

till tomorrow morning.

Hey. Pick up. I've called you 80 times.

I'm really, really sorry.

I... Call me back.

Where's Dad? I wanna go home.

Try and have a good one, all right?

Mrs. Malby? Miss?

Yes? Yes?

- Hey, morning. How you doing?

- Hi. Morning.

Um, so, basically, in order to bail him out,

you're looking at 15,000 bucks.

- Oh, my God. What? - Or he stays

in the slammer until the trial.

Oh, God.

$15,000.

Well, let's go home.

- Maureen?

- What?

Wait.

Cough it up.

Cough what up?

Pay the man your son's bail money.

Are you crazy?

You think if I had that kind of dough

I'd be living with you?

Cut the baloney, Maureen. Please.

I know you have money.

I know you sew it into your panty hose.

And I know you've got

it under your mattress...

and shoved up inside

every shoe in your closet.

Pay the man.

Why can't my family just

love me for my soul...

instead of my meager possessions

and my bank account?

Well, I love your soul, Grandma.

Okay, um... Will you take a check,

or do you want the green stuff?

I'm free!

I'm free!

Look at the sky.

Can you see how blue the sky is?

This entire experience has transformed me.

I am a new man. The old Walter is dead.

But the new Walter

wants to say how much I love you guys.

I'm a new man, and we're a new family.

I mean, look,

we have our problems. What family doesn't?

I know I get to be bullheaded. And,

you know, Ryden here is

essentially unemployable.

Hmm?

Hunter licks people, and...

Grandma's very, very...

very... kind.

So kind.

But, no matter what, we're a family.

We're a real family.

We're the Malbys, damn it.

From now on, it's Malby time.

Malby! Malby! Malby!

Malby! Malby! Malby!

Malby! Malby! Malby!

Malby! Malby! Malby! Malby!

Malby! Malby! Malby!

Malby! Malby! Malby!

That's all right, honey.

I'll just take a cab over to the curb.

- Malby!

- Grab my purse.

- My purse. - Did you leave it

at the police station, Maureen?

- No, I didn't leave... I thought

you had it. -

- I don't have your purse.

- Adam?

- I'm looking for Ryden Malby.

- That's me.

This is Barbara Snaff

from Happerman & Browning.

Listen, the position you interviewed for

just came available again.

You wanna fire me? Fine. I don't care.

I'm gonna own this town. And I'm gonna come

back, and I'm gonna take you down.

Wait... Wait, are you serious?

You're offering me the job?

Yes. Absolutely. When can you start?

The job is yours if you want it.

Immediately! Absolutely, yes.

Great. I'll have my assistant call you

with all the details.

- Thank you. Perfect.

- She's not there anymore.

- Guys, I got the job! I got the job!

- Yea!

- Does it pay? Does it pay?

- Yeah, it pays!

- Malby! Malby!

- Malby! Malby!

- Malby! Malby!

- She got a job!

Okay.

Yo, it's Adam. You know what to do.

Okay. Silent treatment. I get it.

Very fifth grade of you. But very effective.

Please call me. Please?

Yo, it's Adam. You know what to do.

All right.

Just... call me when you're ready.

Yo, yo.

I got him. I got him.

Yeah, yeah, go. Go, Adam.

Take it in. Take it in.

Yes!

- Nice shot.

- All right. Check ball.

I'm open right here.

Someone once told me that every...

evil, horrible thing in the world...

can be directly counteracted by

the joy of a simple dessert.

I'm really sorry, Adam.

I know you don't wanna talk to me,

but I really have something

to tell you. I wish you...

Hold on a second.

If you don't forgive

me, I will follow you...

everywhere you go,

playing this extremely annoying song...

till you slowly go insane.

Okay. Just make it stop.

Ha!

How do you steal an ice cream truck?

Borrow.

My dad knows a guy that knows a guy, so...

Of course.

Look.

I'm good.

I'm so sorry I flaked on you, Adam.

You would never do anything like that to me.

And I've been thinking a lot about...

- I accept your apology.

- Wait. You have to let me get this out.

I have been thinking a lot

about what you said...

and I think you just...

maybe you just threw me because...

Look, it's fine.

Really, it's... It's all good.

I'm just...

You know, I'm in the middle of a game.

- Yo.

- Well, wait.

Um, do you wanna,

I don't know, hang out later? Um...

Oh, we could celebrate,

'cause I didn't get a chance to tell you...

but I got that job at Happerman & Browning.

That's awesome.

Uh, I...

But I can't get together later,

'cause I kind of need to pack.

Pack?

Yeah. Uh...

Look, I didn't get a chance to tell you...

but I decided to go to Columbia.

And I'm leaving tomorrow.

What? You're going to law school?

In New York?

Yeah.

That's...

That's... so great.

- Congratulations. - Yeah, I think

it'll be... I think it'll be good.

Look, I promise I'll call you...

as soon as I get settled in, okay?

- Okay.

- Let's go.

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