Pottersville

Synopsis: Maynard is a beloved local businessman who is mistaken for the legendary Bigfoot during an inebriated romp through town in a makeshift gorilla costume. The sightings set off an ...
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Seth Henrikson
Production: Wing and a Prayer Pictures
 
IMDB:
5.2
PG-13
Year:
2017
84 min
169 Views


Now, the snow is falling

It's Christmas time again

For the end of December When

the weather's getting chilly

The little boys and girls

Party willy, willy nilly

But most of all

When snow days fall

They know it's Christmas

Christmas time

When mother's in the

kitchen Stuffing turkey

And little baby sister's

Acting like kinda perky

But most of all

When snow days fall

They know it's Christmas

Christmas time

Snowflakes are falling

Falling all around

May they keep on falling

'Til they cover the ground

You start to get in the

spirit My baby get jiggy

As we trim The

Christmas tree

But most of all

When snowflakes fall

They know it's Christmas

Christmas time

Snowflakes are falling

Falling all around

May they keep on falling

I know it's Christmas

Christmas Christmas

Christmas Time

- No, Samuel, not today.

- Please?

That's $47.50.

Maynard, I know our tab is pretty high,

but is there any way that we could...?

Oh, yeah, of course.

I'm sorry, it's just... as

soon as Bill finds a job...

It's not a problem. I'll

just write it down.

- You sure?

- Yeah.

It's just with the darn mill closing

and it being the holidays and all.

I understand. It's

tough on everybody.

Thank you so much.

Don't worry about it.

Hey, Sam.

Here you go, buddy.

- Thanks, Maynard.

- You bet ya.

Thank you.

You're a good man, May.

What are you gonna do? The

kid wanted a candy bar.

You know what I'm talking about.

Any coffee back there?

Two coffees coming up.

Old cedar and fresh flowers.

Never get tired of

the smell in here.

Afternoon, Bart. What you got?

I got elk steaks.

I got squab.

I got... wild boar.

- Is there anything you can't catch?

- Yeah, a break.

You interested?

You know, Connie loves

these elk steaks.

She'd kill me if I didn't

bring something home.

I was kind of counting on that.

Hi, Parker.

Hello, Bart.

Here you go.

You still making that stuff?

Moonshine will drive you crazy.

The way I look at it,

we live on this tiny little rock that's

flying through the blackness of space

at about, what,

60,000 miles an hour?

And there's only one

damn way to get off it.

If that thought don't make you crazy,

I don't know what the hell will.

I guess you're right. Never

thought of it that way.

That's because you spend most of your

time stuck standing behind this counter.

You need to get out, Maynard,

and breathe some life.

I suppose I do. I suppose I do.

It all goes by in a flash, pal.

I mean, trust me, one day you'll wake up

and go, "Where the hell did it all go?"

For the next time you

wanna get a little crazy.

All right. Thanks.

- So, just the elk steaks?

- That'll do it.

Tell that pretty little wife of

yours she has excellent taste.

Will do.

Old cedar and fresh

flowers, I love it.

Love it!

Hey, Park, you mind

doing me a favor?

Of course. What's up?

You mind closing up tonight,

running to the bank?

What happened, your

house on fire?

I just wanna surprise

Connie, you know?

Go home, grill up these steaks.

A nice bottle of wine.

Some flowers.

Breathe a little life.

Sweet, Maynard.

Yeah, I'll close up.

All right.

Great.

Great.

Dashing through the snow

In a one horse open sleigh

O'er the fields we go

Laughing all the way

Bells on bob tails ring

Making spirits bright

Hey, honey.

Now don't have a heart attack, but I

decided to cut out a little early.

Wanted to spend a nice,

romantic evening with you.

I hope you're hungry, 'cause I got a

little something special planned for us.

Connie, you here?

No way.

Did she get a puppy?

Maynard?

Connie? What's going on?

What are you doing here?

In my home?

No, I mean now.

I wanted to surprise you.

You know, I'm just

gonna take off.

Jack?

- Is that...? What's going on?

- I can explain this.

You can explain why you're

dressed up like a rabbit

and having sex with a squirrel?

- I'm a wolf.

- We don't have sex.

That's right. According to the

club, you can't even have sex.

- Club? What club is this?

- Well, it's the kind of club where...

You-dress-up-like-a-squirrel-

and-have-sex-my-wife club?

I'm a wolf.

How many people are in the club?

Well, in the tri-county area we got...

what is it, 32?

Look, I've been meaning to

talk to you for a while.

A while? How long has

this been going on?

That's not important, Maynard. What

is important is that I'm bored.

Get a hobby! Learn

to knit, do macram.

- Are you kidding me?

- We don't do anything!

We don't go anywhere! I need

some excitement in my life!

So instead of talking to me about

it, somewhere in your brain,

the thing that makes

sense, is to go out

and have sex with a squirrel?

I'm a wolf!

Get it? It doesn't make

any sense as a squirrel!

It's gotta be a wolf!

Jack, we have been

friends forever.

I know.

That's why I'm gonna need

to ask a favor of you.

Sure thing, whatever

you need, buddy.

You know, I'm kind of a

big deal in this town

and don't think it'd be good

if people knew I was a furry.

What's a furry?

Furry. It's this

club we belong to.

Well, don't 32 other

people already know?

Seriously, Maynard, okay? I'm

gonna need your word on this.

I think we need to take some time apart

and think about what we really want.

Maynard! Maynard! You're gonna

have to keep a tight lip on this.

I'm kind of a big

deal around here.

- Well, I am.

- I know.

We wish you a merry Christmas

We wish you a merry Christmas

And a happy new year

We wish you a merry Christmas

And a happy new year

Merry Christmas everybody!

You're still here.

I was just about to

call it a night.

That's why you're the best.

Are you drunk?

First time since my wedding night,

and we all know how that turned out.

I don't understand.

What happened?

Well...

I went out to breathe

some life...

and then life decided to

take a poop on my face.

So, I ended up breathing

poop instead.

Rabbit and squirrel

poop, to be precise.

What? Maynard, you're

not making any sense.

You're right! Because

he wasn't a squirrel.

He was a wolf! He's a wolf.

Doesn't work if he's a squirrel.

It only works if he's a wolf.

Sorry for the confusion.

It was a wolf.

Let's make you some coffee.

- No, I want my moonshine.

- Okay.

Bart gave me this.

This stuff is making me crazy.

- No argument here.

- It's okay, Parker.

'Cause you gotta get crazy sometime,

because of the speeding little rock.

- You want some?

- No, I think I'm good.

Let's get you home.

I don't have a home.

Of course you do and Connie's

gonna be worried sick.

There's no Connie.

She's been replaced by the

Easter Bunny's evil twin.

She left me.

What?

Yeah.

Oh, Maynard.

I'm so sorry.

Is there anything that...?

Is there anything that I can...?

No.

I just wanna sit here.

Let me take you

back to my place.

It's fine.

It's fine.

I just wanna be here alone...

think about wolves,

and rocks, and stuff.

You sure you don't want

me to stay with you?

Let me ask you a question.

This is very important.

Okay.

Rate this script:0.0 / 0 votes

Daniel Meyer

Daniel Meyer is the name of: more…

All Daniel Meyer scripts | Daniel Meyer Scripts

0 fans

Submitted on August 05, 2018

Discuss this script with the community:

0 Comments

    Translation

    Translate and read this script in other languages:

    Select another language:

    • - Select -
    • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
    • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
    • Español (Spanish)
    • Esperanto (Esperanto)
    • 日本語 (Japanese)
    • Português (Portuguese)
    • Deutsch (German)
    • العربية (Arabic)
    • Français (French)
    • Русский (Russian)
    • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
    • 한국어 (Korean)
    • עברית (Hebrew)
    • Gaeilge (Irish)
    • Українська (Ukrainian)
    • اردو (Urdu)
    • Magyar (Hungarian)
    • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
    • Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Italiano (Italian)
    • தமிழ் (Tamil)
    • Türkçe (Turkish)
    • తెలుగు (Telugu)
    • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
    • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
    • Čeština (Czech)
    • Polski (Polish)
    • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
    • Românește (Romanian)
    • Nederlands (Dutch)
    • Ελληνικά (Greek)
    • Latinum (Latin)
    • Svenska (Swedish)
    • Dansk (Danish)
    • Suomi (Finnish)
    • فارسی (Persian)
    • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
    • հայերեն (Armenian)
    • Norsk (Norwegian)
    • English (English)

    Citation

    Use the citation below to add this screenplay to your bibliography:

    Style:MLAChicagoAPA

    "Pottersville" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 5 Nov. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/pottersville_16133>.

    We need you!

    Help us build the largest writers community and scripts collection on the web!

    Watch the movie trailer

    Pottersville

    The Studio:

    ScreenWriting Tool

    Write your screenplay and focus on the story with many helpful features.


    Quiz

    Are you a screenwriting master?

    »
    In which year was "The Dark Knight" released?
    A 2009
    B 2008
    C 2010
    D 2007