Queens Page #7

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anyone so in love.

- Nice way of showing it.

- Well, maybe.

Human beings are capable

of anything...

...when they feel lonely.

- He's not lonely. He has me.

When, f*ggot?

Nstor, I'm worse than I was.

I don't know why I pay you, if all I can

do is talk to your answering machine.

- Call me back now!

- I'm going to pay it.

Narciso!

Hello?

You didn't have dinner with us

because you were in Brussels...

...right?

- Yes, so what?

How come you were in Brussels

if you lost a suitcase...

on a flight coming from Marrakesh?

The airport called.

They found your suitcase.

You can pick it up whenever you like.

Who were you with in Marrakesh?

Does Hugo know that you

have affairs with other men?

This is the third time I catch you.

Twice in Barcelona and once here.

I want to be faithful, but I just cannot.

Then we're not so different.

Yes, we are.

I don't screw family members.

Your room...

just the way you left it.

I could sleep at my office.

- On the sofa.

- Don't be silly.

- You're happy, right?

- Why?

Because Narciso left me.

Don't say that.

Do you want me to order food?

Hugo?

I'll order the spinach pie

that we like so much.

Did I tell you I had an alarm put it?

I'll have to show you how it works.

And give you a set of keys.

I spend my days

in this goddamn hotel!

I wasted thirty years here,

as if it's worth it.

And what do I have?

A husband via video conference...

a blackmailing lover and a gay son.

Do you know how long it's been

since I went to a movie?

When Robert Redford was young.

He wouldn't treat me like you do.

He's a gentleman.

I'll offer you five percent,

and not a cent more.

Ten.

The sun in Cuba cooked your brains.

- Eight, and I'll take you to a movie.

- Five or nothing.

Nothing, then.

Have you never had

any feelings for me?

Yes, but I have a wife and five

children who need the money...

that I send them. Do you know

when I last saw them?

Fidel Castro was young.

- Cancel your trip!

- I can't.

We're leaving in two hours.

Nathan is coming from California...

and Bill from Chicago. They represent

the world's largest hotels.

We cannot fail because of four

damned euros. Meet their demands.

Don't make me do that,

or I'll go on strike!

Don't be so proud, Magda.

Business is business.

Are you and I a business?

- I worked years to sell this idea.

- How about me? I didn't do a thing!

THREE HOURS LATER

Narciso, a lady wants to see you.

She says she's your mother.

My mother?

- Just a little bit!

- I'm calling the police.

- Just a little bit.

- Shut up.

- What's up? Can't we come in?

- Not without an invitation.

- We're the mothers of the grooms.

- What are mothers doing here...

at a bachelor's party? I don't get it!

- We're getting in.

- How?

- Leave it to me.

- You cannot come in.

- We lost our invitations.

- Were you invited?

Of course we were.

We're getting married tomorrow.

What's wrong? You think we're

too old to get married?

We're engaged. She's my little kitten.

There are two old ladies who want

to talk to someone in charge.

- What do you want?

- We want to talk to the mothers...

...of the brides and grooms.

- There are no mothers here.

Their children are here and can

give us their moms' phone numbers.

We'll have to wait until

they're all up on the stage.

- Come on, cheer up!

- I hate my father.

- Lf you did, you wouldn't be sad.

- I did everything...

so that he would feel proud of me.

I graduated with good grades.

I worked while I studied...

played soccer with him on Sundays,

even though I hate soccer.

Everything, except falling in love

with Barbie instead of Ken.

Is that your mother?

Who's that behind her?

- You're not allowed in here.

- Police. Give me that microphone.

Who's gonna do it?

I will.

THREE HOURS EARLIER

Excuse me, dear,

I know you're busy...

but I think I have a solution

to your problem.

I have a restaurant in Buenos Aires,

and on many occasions...

I had to improvise a meal

for over 50 people.

- There'll be 200 here tomorrow.

- Perfect!

Let's find three more people like me,

and we're made.

I don't get it.

The ingredients for the banquet...

whatever they are, I presume,

are in the refrigerator.

- Yes.

- So, all we need to do is cook them.

Couldn't we find some mothers...

willing to work all night long

for their sons?

We won't be running any risk.

We're not competitors,

or temporary workers...

we're mothers.

You cannot deny a mother her right...

to fulfill her basic role

and feed her children.

- Would you organize it?

- Yes, if you get the mothers.

That's very generous of yours.

I'm generous,

but I have another reason.

If it works, I want you to give me

a job in your hotel.

DOG MISSING:

ANSWERS TO MARILINA

REWARD GIVEN:

- Hello?

- Nuria?

- Finally!

- I tried to call you all day...

but I had a bad day. For starters,

the airline lost my suitcase.

I followed your advice

and I'm worse off than I was.

Now I'm a mess and I can't even cry.

- How did Narciso take it?

- He put me on a train.

- I no longer have a son.

- You're overreacting.

I'll never get him back.

- Drop me off at Iberia, please.

- Where are you going?

To pick up my suitcase.

I told you that they lost it.

Iberia lost your luggage?

Where were you?

- In Marrakesh.

- What do you mean, in Marrakesh?!

Hugo, you've been there

for half an hour. That's enough.

Spinach pie, my room

decorated with flags...

your apartment's alarm password

is the worst I can...

...expect from life.

- I'm calling the fire brigade.

I know you think I won't leap...

but a guy who screws his

mother-in-law will do anything.

Don't blame yourself.

You're a great guy!

You say that now

because you're scared...

but you really think

that I'm absurd...

that I have no personality

and do things without thinking.

The ideal son to take you

to the theater when you retire.

You're mistaken, if you think

I'm happy to have you stay here.

I like living alone.

I found what I was looking for

when I had sex with her.

I was looking for a mother.

Semon.

- Where is he?

- On the ledge.

Hugo, please, you're 27.

You asked me if I had

screwed a woman, right?

Well, now I have, and here I am.

- Get in, or I'll come and get you.

- Lf you do, I'll jump!

That's enough!

What do you want, Narciso?

- I'll call him. What's his number?

- He'll never forgive me.

You always say that

we have to be tolerant...

...and not judge other people!

- You are not tolerant!

I don't like to see men and women

kiss even if they have bouquets.

It makes me sick!

But that's because I think that

marriage is the world's biggest lie!

- He's out of range.

- Life without him does not make sense.

- Right. I'll go get him!

- No!

It's Narciso! Yes?

- I don't want to talk to him.

- How about his mother?

Will you talk to her?

He doesn't want to talk to you.

Tell him not to torture himself.

I'll tell him about Narciso.

Are there any stations

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