Reach Me

There's no stopping...

Who stop...

Stopping... someone who will stop...

Who stops at nothing...

You can get...

There's no stopping someone

that will stop at nothing.

There's no stopping someone

that will stop at nothing.

So if you want something,

you have to decide how to get it,

because no one else

is gonna get it for you.

If you're stuck in your job

or some stale relationship,

if today always feels like yesterday

and you can't see a new tomorrow,

then guess what.

You're what needs fixing.

So stop blaming your parents,

stop blaming your boss,

your spouse, the dog, the neighbor,

everybody else for your problems.

Look, stop the crying, all right?

Because the point is,

you have the power to transform

your sh*t at the snap of a finger.

Make the decision to

become a success.

No one can make it until they first decide

that they are going to become a success.

You are on fire this morning.

All right, so this book, Reach Me,

seems to have transformed

your game, e-ruption, yes?

Transformed my attitude. It's transformed

my relationship with my father and my son.

Don't change that.

Put it back, please.

Kiss my ass, b*tch.

Yo! Don't you touch that.

What are you doing?

That's it. That's it!

Dumbass.

Yo. Where you going, Colette?

I told you to kiss my ass.

Yeah, kiss her ass, ho.

You really want me to kiss your ass?

I don't give a damn about you getting

out tomorrow. I want you to kiss my ass.

I want your lips on my ass. Let's go.

Now! Let's go!

Bring it over here! Let's go!

Hurry the hell up.

What you waiting on, b*tch?

Come on!

- Yeah, come on.

- Come on, come on, kiss it.

- Kiss it.

- Kiss it!

- Kiss it.

- Kiss it.

- Get in there.

- Hurry up.

Oh, Jesus.

Last year, I was in the joint.

This year I'm sitting here with you with the

number one single. You can't beat that.

You know what, I think I

need to read this book.

- Who wrote it?

- See, that's the enigma.

There's not even a picture

of the author on the jacket.

No bio, nothing.

Just a name, Teddy Raymond.

And I bet that's not

even his real name.

- Strange.

- Yeah.

It's like he doesn't

want to be known.

He just wants his words

to speak for themselves.

And in a day where everybody wants to

be a celebrity, even me, I respect it.

I think it's very interesting,

and I think it's dope.

Well, I understand that since he is

anonymous there are some people

that are staging live readings

via Internet chat right now.

Twitter is blowing up, social media's

blowing up because of this message.

It's like people are empowering

themselves all over this world.

Yes, Gerald?

You're watching good

day in the valley?

- I am.

- Interesting story?

Stupid bumper sticker quotes.

Why would a best-selling

author go into hiding?

- Who cares?

- I care. Get over here now.

Sh*t.

- What are you doing?

- A birdie.

What do you want me

to do, cheat myself?

What are you getting mad at me for?

You made a great putt.

Huh?

What are you looking at? Go get it!

Tommy lives in Redondo Beach,

California. Here's the address.

But do not harm his girlfriend,

Denise-Denise.

Denise-Denise?

Yeah, her doo-wop moron parents named

her after that old song, you know?

Anyway, she was so hot.

I took a class with her.

- I used to stare at her tits in Spanish.

- You can stare in Spanish?

Spanish class, moron.

- Oh.

- A night class, Spanish.

I thought you meant...

In a few years, half the country's

gonna be speaking Spanish.

You want to loan 'em money or sell 'em

dope, you better speak their language.

Anyway, look, Tommy borrowed 100

grand to make this hi-def movie.

Made a few payments, then skipped.

Now, he's German. I want him hurt bad.

I want you to turn

his nose into mush.

You hit him so many times

that there's nothing left of it.

- Take pictures.

- Done.

Reach me? What are you gonna

reach for, you Scottish ape?

- Another banana on a tree?

- Some kinda motivation book he found.

Yeah, maybe it'll motivate some of

those dead brain cells of yours

to get moving around your brain. Here.

Oh, yeah, and Tommy's got this little dog.

Little weiner dog

named Beezy. Shoot him.

I'm going stir crazy!

I'm losing my mind. I really am.

Tommy, calm down. What if the motel

calls the cops? You'll get arrested,

- and we'll be in worse shape.

- Calm down? We have no money.

- So let's move.

- With what?

"So let's move." We have

no money, Denise-Denise.

- I am broke.

- Stop worrying about money.

Oh, "stop worrying about money".

- How we gonna eat?

- I'll get a job.

- Don't say no.

- No!

- So German.

- Nein!

Should've left you in Phoenix.

What's wrong with me?

Why did I take that money from Frank?

I made you take me. Remember?

You borrowed that money for a good

reason, to make a movie star in me.

I just wish you would've read

more books on directing.

Make a beeline by Douglas

Zappelman and Eric Bicardi.

I'll give you ten

points for a cripple.

Hey, don't play rap in this car.

Turn that off.

- Passing by the station, man.

- Well, you can pass by it faster, man.

That ain't music.

It's jungle jingles.

Can't believe they give

Emmys for that sh*t.

- It's Grammy, not Emmy.

- What?

Grammys for music. Emmys for TV.

Oscars for the movies.

I forgot what they

give you for plays.

Hey, let's go over this

plan one more time.

Hey, what are you doing?

Put that joint out, Wolfie!

- The weed helps me focus.

- What happens if a little piggy squeals by?

Well, I could dust 'em.

Where did you get this guy?

- What kind of gun is that, man?

- I had this special made, man.

You can't miss.

You just point and shoot.

- Hey, let me see that.

- Are your hands clean?

- Oh, give me the gun. Jesus.

- All right.

Oh, that's nice.

Let me use this, just for this job.

Man, I told you, I had that

special made just for me.

Do you want to do this job or not?

All right, car running. Let's do it.

Oh, Baba, it's Tonys. That's what

they give for the plays, Tonys.

Yeah.

Drop 'em!

Damn!

- You bastard!

- Drop 'em!

Nice work.

- You all right, captain?

- Yeah, I'm good.

- You all right?

- Yeah, I'm all right.

We shared that one.

- You know that, right?

- Get out of here.

Get out of here. I don't

want your face on the news.

All right, hey, there's some

oregano joints in the car

- if you want to get crazy.

- Get out of here.

Do I want to hear a political joke?

No, 'cause the trouble with political

jokes is they usually get elected.

Please.

So why would I hold breaking news

of your peccadillo, senator?

Right, I know. It's humiliating.

I guess we all live with humiliation.

My prized muckraker dresses like

he just fell out of the hamper,

and I think he's looking for a raise

'cause he can't afford a razor.

Got something for you.

Well, listen, if you want me to

keep your indiscretion quiet,

you got to give me more than

two senators switching sides.

- The story's bigger than that.

- Right.

And I'm not going to anybody else.

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