Restless Natives

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[BIRDS CHIRPING]

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY

LIONS GATE ENTERTAINMEN [SHEEP BLEATING

IN DISTANCE]

[MUMBLES]

THIS IS A HOLD-UP.

I BEG YOUR PARDON?

THIS IS A HOLD-UP.

WHAT'S

HE TALKING ABOUT?

OH. RAG WEEK.

RAG WEEK?

STUDENTS, YOU MORON.

NO! NO! YOU DON' UNDERSTAND.

DON'T WASTE YOUR BREATH

ASKING FOR ANY MORE.

YOU'RE THE THIRD

THIS WEEK ALREADY.

NO, REALLY.

WHAT I WANT TO KNOW,

YOUNG MAN, IS ARE WE

ON THE RIGHT ROAD

TO INVERLOCH?

WE'LL DRIVE ON.

THEY LIVE IN A WORLD

OF THEIR OWN, THESE STUDENTS.

DON'T DO THAT! THOSE CHILDREN

WILL DRIVE ME NUTS.

SHH! BE QUIET!

STOP ANNOYING:

YOUR DADDY.

NOW, IF WE TAKE

THE THIRD RIGHT...

DON'T TELL ME

ANYMORE...

[BLEATING]

Man:
NO. I'M NOT SAYING

IT'S A COMPLETE FAILURE.

THAT'S NOT RIGHT. I'M

NOT BOTHERED ABOUT THAT.

AND I WOULDN'T BE

IF IT WAS.

I'M JUST SAYING

MAYBE IT'S NOT RIGHT,

THAT SORT OF THING.

I MEAN, DON'T YOU THINK

IN SOME WAYS:

IT'S A BAD THING TO TAKE

OTHER PEOPLE'S MONEY?

IT IS! PEOPLE WORK HARD

FOR THEIR MONEY,

SOME OF THEM.

[BELL DINGS]

I'M IN A HURRY, OK?

STINK BOMB.

WHAT'S IT COST, THAT?

NASTY SUGAR.

BANGERS...

ARE YOU SURE ABOU THE NASTY SUGAR?

AYE, 3 BAGS.

UH, PICKED SCAB.

LUMINOUS SNOT,

AND A PLASTIC TURD.

3.5...

[COINS CLATTER

ON COUNTER]

DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH

IT COSTS JUST TO SEND

ONE SOLITARY POLICEMAN

OUT ON A CASE?

THERE'S EXPENSES.

THERE'S WEAR AND TEAR.

THERE'S PETROL.

THERE'S OVERTIME.

THAT IS TAX PAYERS'

MONEY, RONNIE.

IT'S A BAD THING.

LOOK...

WHAT DO YOU WAN OUT OF LIFE?

YOU WANT MONEY AND

YOU WANT EXCITEMENT.

RIGHT? WHY?

NO.

BECAUSE WITHOUT MONEY,

WITHOUT MONEY,

YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING!

LOOK, YOU WERE TALKING

ABOUT BAD THINGS, RIGHT?

DON'T YOU THINK

IT'S A BAD THING

THAT YOU'RE WORKING

IN A CORPORATION

AND I'M STUCK HERE

SELLING ALL THIS JUNK?

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S

A BAD THING TO SETTLE

FOR A LITTLE WHEN MAYBE

YOU COULD GET A LO OUT OF LIFE?

YOU SEE, THE POINT IS:

THE POINT IS THA WE ARE SMARTER

THAN THEY ARE.

I KEEP GETTING THESE FUNNY

WEE WARTS ON MY FINGERS.

LOOK, YOU HAVE GO TO TAKE YOUR CHANCE NOW!

EH?

THERE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE

ANY POINT TO IT ALL.

OH, MARY, I CAN' STAND THE STRAIN.

FIRST OFF,

YOU GET A JOB, SON.

AND NOW YOU TURN

INTO A DEEP THINKER,

A PHILOSOPHER.

WELL, WHAT YOU GONNA

BE NEXT, HUH?

THE NATION WAITS.

HE KNOWS HE'S LUCKY

TO HAVE A JOB.

DON'T YOU, DEAR?

HE'S JUST TIRED AND HE

WANTS TO EAT HIS FOOD.

CAROL PEYTON'S

BIG BROTHER'S GONE

TO NEW MEXICO, AND

HE'S GOING TO EARN

500 A WEEK

IN AMERICA.

AYE, AYE.

THERE'S OPPORTUNITIES

FOR THEM THAT WANT THEM.

WHAT'S THE MATTER,

SON?

IT'S HIS BIORHYTHMS.

HE CANNAE HELP IT.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

I'LL GET IT.

MOM?

HMM?

DOES DOING BAD THINGS

GIVE YOU WARTS?

I THINK THAT'S SOMETHING

YOU'D BETTER DISCUSS

WITH YOUR FATHER

LATER ON.

MOM, CAN I GO TO THE

DISCO ON SATURDAY?

MARY.

MOM!

HANG ON A MINUTE.

I'LL COME OUT THERE

AND TALK TO YOU:

ABOUT IT.

MAYBE IF:

I STAYED AT...

[MOTHER CONTINUES

INDISTINCT]

WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE,

YOU HAD TO GO AND SEE

THE DOCTOR FOR YOUR WARTS,

AND HE'D BURN THEM OFF OF YOU.

YOU'D LIE ON THE COUCH...

A GREAT FAT NURSE

WOULD COME ALONG.

AND SHE'D PAINT RED OINTMEN ONTO EACH WART--WHOA!

OH! THE STENCH WAS

SOMETHING TERRIBLE.

AND THEN THE DOCTOR

WOULD COME ALONG

WITH HIS LONG,

POINTED NEEDLE,

AND THE NURSE WOULD

HOLD YOU DOWN:

'CAUSE YOU WERE

SCREAMING BY THEN, SEE?

AND HE'D COME AT YOU.

CLOSER...

AND CLOSER...

TILL SUDDENLY--ZIP!

RIGHT INTO THE ROOT.

[SHOUTS]

HE'S A BUGGER, TOO!

HE'S WEARING A HAT.

COME HERE, YOU FATTY!

Father:

NOT EXACTLY FIRED.

SORT OF.

SORT OF FIRED.

[TOILET FLUSHES]

WELL, MORE SORT OF

RESIGNED, ACTUALLY.

Isla:
MAYBE SORT OF

RETIRED, YOU KNOW.

I'M WARNING YOU!

[CLOCK TICKING]

Ronnie:
HEY!

I'VE GOT IT JUST HERE.

DO YOU KNOW:

WHAT THIS IS?

THIS IS THE THING.

IT'S MAGIC!

THEY DON'T STAND

A CHANCE NOW, MAN.

ARRRGH! HA!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

[BELL RINGS]

HAVE YOU BEEN SELLING

ANY MORE OF THAT AWFUL SUGAR

TO MY WEE ANGUS?

ME? OH!

I'VE TOLD YOU BEFORE,

RONNIE WEATHERSPOON!

HOW MANY TIMES DO

I HAVE TO TELL YOU?

[TOY SQUEAKING]

I DON'T WANT ANYMORE

TROUBLE FROM YOU

WITH ANY OF MY BAIRNS!

[SQUEAK, SQUEAK]

OHH!

YOU'LL HAVE

MR. PATERSON DOWN HERE

AND I WON'T ANSWER

FOR THE CONSEQUENCES,

YOU STUPID WEE BUGGER!

JUST A WASTE OF GOOD

SPACE, THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE.

I'M SORRY.

I WON'T DO IT AGAIN.

SEE THAT MR. HARDWICK

GETS TO HEAR ABOUT THIS.

[DOOR SLAMS,

BELL RINGS]

I THINK I KNOW WHERE

WE CAN GET A GUN.

[IMITATING GUNFIRE]

IT'S NICE OUT HERE, YEAH?

ARE YOU SURE YOU WAN TO COME TOMORROW?

MY MOM SAYS THA THE THING THAT I WAN IS GOLD.

IF I BOUGHT A FAKE

GOLD RING OR SOMETHING,

YOU KNOW,

IT WOULD GO AWAY.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

WELL, ACTUALLY,

I THINK THAT'S RIGHT.

I THINK I HAVE:

HEARD THAT.

THAT'S GOOD.

GOOD.

Woman:
HIDDEN AMONG

THE GRAMPIAN MOUNTAINS,

STEEPED IN THE HISTORY

AND LEGEND OF A COLORFUL PAST.

PASSENGERS WILL BE ABLE

TO FRESHEN UP IN ABOU 20 MINUTES AT THE BEN

McALPINE VISITORS CENTER.

AND NOW TO YOUR LEF YOU CAN SEE

SOME OF THE MOST SPECTACULAR

SCENERY IN SCOTLAND.

THE MOUNTAIN RISING IN

THE CENTER IS BEN LOCKHART.

AND IN A CAVE ON THE OTHER SIDE,

BONNIE PRINCE CHARLIE

IS SAID TO HAVE TAKEN REFUGE

FROM THE REDCOATS.

AND TO THE RIGHT...

A MOTORCYCLE?

[AIR BRAKES HISS]

THIS IS...

A GUN!

THIS...

THIS IS A GUN!

THIS IS A HOLD-UP.

PLEASE GET ALL:

YOUR CASH AND JEWELRY

READY FOR COLLECTION.

THANK YOU.

THANKS. I'M SO SORRY.

THANKS.

THEY WERE MY MOTHER'S.

I'M SO SORRY.

AND WATCHES.

THANKS. THANK YOU.

[WHIMPERS]

THANK YOU.

THANKS VERY MUCH.

[SPEAKS FRENCH]

THANK YOU. THANKS.

THANKS.

HEY, KID.

STAY CALM, OK?

[CHUCKLING]

TAKE IT EASY.

[SNIFFS] NOW, JUS TAKE IT EASY.

NOBODY'S GONNA

GET HURT.

GIVE IT UP, SMARTASS.

[HORN BEEPS]

[SNEEZE]

Will:
GOD BLESS YOU.

ACHOO!

ACHOO!

Ronnie:

THAT WASN'T SO BAD.

HURRAY!

WHOO!

[SHOUTS]

STEAKS.

STEAKS THAT THICK.

WITH MASHED:

POTATOES.

NO. TRIMMED

POTATOES.

PEAS AND ONION:

RINGS.

AND CHOCOLATE:

MILKSHAKES.

CHOCOLATE MILKSHAKES.

AND BRANDY EVERY DAY.

WHAT DID YOU PU IN THAT PUFFER?

IT WAS BRILLIANT.

ITCHING POWDER,

SNEEZING POWDER,

CURRY POWDER,

ATHLETE'S

FOOT POWDER,

AND SOME STUFF I GO OUT OF AN OLD FIREWORK.

BUT HOW DID YOU KNOW

IT WOULD WORK?

WELL, I TESTED IT,

DIDN'T I?

I TESTED IT ON ALLY

MATHEWSON'S WEE BROTHER.

HEY, THAT WEE BRANDY YOU

GOT IS REALLY...5 STAR.

COST TWO DAYS'

WAGES, THOUGH.

BUT NEVER MIND.

I CAN GO DOWN TO

THE PACKING SHOP

TOMORROW AND GET A KIT.

NO.

IT'S TERRIBLE NOW.

YOU KNOW, WE CAN' DO ANYTHING.

WHAT ARE YOU:

TALKING ABOUT?

IF WE START SPENDING

ALL THIS MONEY,

THEY'RE GOING TO KNOW,

AREN'T THEY?

EVERYBODY KNOWS:

WE DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY.

[SIGHS]

MAYBE WE COULD:

START A FUND.

YOU KNOW, LIKE A PENSION

FUND FOR FOOTBALLERS

WHEN THEY GET PAST IT.

THEN WE COULD DO

SOMETHING REALLY SPECIAL.

AYE.

SOMETHING REALLY

SPECIAL.

OH, WELL, ACTUALLY,

ACTUALLY,

I'VE BEEN THINKING

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