Revenge of the Nerds III: The Next Generation Page #7

The dermatologists said

they'd never seen anything like it before.

- [Laughs]

- It's not funny, Stan!

- You look like a-

- I know, I know. A candy cane.

- No. A barber pole.

- Oh. Ha-ha.

We interrupt this program to bring you

an urgent message.

My name is Lewis Skolnick...

and I'm chairman...

- [Volume Increases]

- Of the computer science

department at Adams College.

I'm a nerd, and I'm proud of it.

Get your campus cops down to the radio

station and get that moron off the air.

My fellow nerds...

we are facing the greatest challenge

we have ever faced-

the systematic elimination of nerd culture

from the Adams campus.

I, therefore, am calling

for an Adams College nerd strike.

I call for nerds of all ages

to throw down your packs.

In fact, I call for anyone out there

who's ever had a brother...

or a sister who's a nerd, anyone

who's admired a nerd from a distance...

to join me in shutting this school

and all Adams city services down...

until our rights are restored!

- [Door Opens]

- Honey! Lewis!

- Let him go!

- I know our cause is just.

- Let him- Let him go!

- I know God is on our side!

- You let him-

- [Grunting] I know I-

- Lewis! Lewis!

- [Tone Ringing On Radio]

- Got him!

- [Radio Knob Clicks]

Uh, Dean Gable, I'm leaving now.

- Oh, you have a hair appointment, Ruth?

- No, I'm joining the strike.

But you're not a nerd, Ruth.

No, but my son is.

And whatever he is or wants to be,

I support him 100%.

Shut it down!

[No Audible Dialogue]

[Operators Chattering]

- Is anybody in here?

- Hello?

- [Phones Ringing]

- [Overlapping Chattering]

Hello?

- [Phones Ringing]

- [Overlapping Chatter Continues]

[Woman] I'm sorry. I don't have that-

[Continues, Indistinct]

[Woman #2] Please try again. It's 1-800-

[Continues, Indistinct]

[Chattering Stops]

[Phones Ringing]

Shut it down!

- [Man] Shut it down!

- [Operators Shouting]

- [Woman] Shut it down!

- Shut it down!

[Operators]

Strike! Strike!

I told you it's gonna be

a great year.

[All Shouting, Indistinct]

Ninety, 91, 92-

- [Stifled Laugh]

- Call the electric company.

Phone's dead.

Nerds!

- [Groaning]

- You know, you look like a-

I know, I know. A barber pole.

No, I was thinkin'

more like a candy cane.

- That's very funny.

- Look, you got any gas?

Oh, yeah.

Plenty of gas.

- [Laughs]

- [Laughs] Can't sell you any though.

- [Both Laughing]

- What are you, a nerd sympathizer?

Oh, hey. Look, I don't want anything

to do with this nerd thing.

I got no feeling for them

one way or the other.

Your computers

don't work, do they?

- How'd you guess?

- [Orrin] It's the same

at every station all over town.

- So what are we gonna do?

- Ahh.

Don't worry about it.

It's just as tough on them as it is on us.

[Horn Honking]

Why don't you get a horse?

[Imitates Horse Neighing]

[Laughs]

Where'd he get gas?

[Grinding]

- Methanol?

- Fill 'er up.

Not only are we winning

our campus back...

but we're recycling refuse, cutting down

on the consumption of fossil fuels...

and ridding the air

of nasty pollutants.

- [Shrieks]

- [Booger Laughing]

- Aah! No!

- Whoo!

[Laughing]

[Phone Rings]

- [Booger Laughing]

- Whoo-hoo!

- [Laughing Continues]

- [Women Shrieking]

[Screams]

Oh, Booger!

- [Women Shrieking]

- [Booger Laughing]

- Mr. Skolnick.

- Ira, call me Lewis.

Lewis. We are receiving tremendous

nerd support from all across the city.

That's wonderful.

Get on the modems...

and contact all the ex-Tri-Lambs

across the country.

I want them here

for the nerd-in.

Mr. Skolnick?

- [Shutter Clicks]

- [Crowd Cheering]

- [Feedback]

- They call us nerds...

because we've always

been nice to people.

- [Crowd Cheers]

- They call us nerds...

- because we get good grades.

- [Crowd Cheers]

They call us nerds because we treat

our parents with respect.

- [Crowd Cheers]

- Well, they're right.

- We're nerds.

- [Man] We're nerds!

And we're very wet,

and we're very upset.

[Crowd Cheers]

We're nerds. We're wet.

We're very, very upset.

We're nerds! We're wet!

We're very, very upset!

We're nerds! We're wet!

We're very, very upset!

- We're nerds! We're wet!

- He's right.

- Let's take these off.

- We're very, very upset!

- [Chanting Continues]

- Isn't this great?

The old gang isn't coming.

They live all over the country.

They have their own problems

and their own lives.

Yeah, but they know

I sold out.

Even my ex-best friend, Gilbert,

knows I'm a traitor to our people.

We're wet!

We're very, very upset!

We're nerds! We're wet!

We're very, very upset!

- [Chanting Continues]

- Hey, Gable. Boo!

We're nerds! We're wet!

We're very, very upset!

Ladies and gentlemen,

look who finally decided to show up.

Our dean, Stan Harvey Gable.

[Booing, Hissing]

You nerds have ruined my life.

How'd we do that, Stanley?

I used to be

a big man on campus...

until you humiliated me

at the pep rally.

Then you stole Betty away from me.

[Panting]

After that, not another living soul ever

respected me again.

You're such a victim, Stan, aren't you?

Maybe you ought to start taking

responsibility for your actions...

instead of blaming all your faults

and failures on others.

Uhh! Get! Get!

- [Crowd Cheering]

- [Man] Gable, you jerk!

[Woman]

Gable is unable!

[Man #2]

Get off the campus, Gable!

[Cheering,

Shouting Continues]

[Man]

Not a friend to nerds!

- [Door Closes]

- [Sighs]

The campus police

have joined the strike.

They're everywhere. It seems as if

you shake anyone's family tree...

a couple of nerds will drop out.

Maybe we should

try and negotiate.

I don't negotiate with nerds.

Well, what are we gonna do,

Orrin?

The press is gonna have

a field day with this.

I'm gonna be the laughingstock

of the entire country.

The school is paralyzed. There's no

telephones, no electricity, no gas.

It's like Baghdad around here!

Shut up!

We destroy Lewis Skolnick, the rest of those

nerds will fall like a deck of cards.

How would you destroy him?

By revealing his misuse

of Adams College funds.

Lewis has been misusing

Adams funds?

Remember those papers

I had you have him sign?

- Yeah.

- Well, Lewis doesn't know it...

but I've been using part

of his monthly appropriation...

to get things that I think

the college needs.

Like what?

Like procuring women for the football players,

new yacht, Lear jet-

things the school needs.

Well, why didn't you

tell me about this?

- I didn't think that was necessary.

- Not necessary?

I'm the dean!

Come on, Stan.

We both know what you are.

[Chuckles]

And if you want to stay the dean,

you'll keep your mouth shut.

You could ruin him for life.

I know. Terrible, isn't it?

[Laughing]

[Steam Hissing]

[Whirring]

[Stan]

You have any eights?

- Go fish.

- Hmm.

We've broken their backs.

They're all returning to work.

Great. Uh, got an eight.

He did it for sure.

How else did he get that Beemer?

- This is a lie.

- Of course it is.

- I didn't know anything about this.

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