Richard Pryor Live on the Sunset Strip Page #2

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You ugly motherf***er?"

I don't f*** around anymore,

since I got married.

I am married.

I don't f*** around.

That's right.

When you are married...

say you don't f*** around

it you got any brains.

My wife:
"What? Did you f***..."

"No, I was not f***ing her.

I don't care what you think you saw.

I was not f***ing her.

Now. Are you gonna believe me

or your lying eyes?

I was not f***ing her."

And my wife... My wife

has been putting up with me...

We went together six years

before the b*tch landed me.

She paid dues...

'cause I am no day at the beach.

I know I'm hard to get along with.

I know that...

'cause I might wake up

in the morning and go...

"Hey. Wake up.

What was that sh*t

you said last February?"

This is my forth, fifth, sixth marriage.

Eighth? I don't know.

But I remember every woman

that I was ever in love with.

I remember all 12 of them.

I really do.

They were wonderful.

It's just...

I've never been able to have a...

what they call sustain a relationship.

That's what it's called now.

In other words. When you stop wantin'

to be with the motherf***er, you leave.

That's what I do.

Most people hang around till the sh*t

get... makes you look ugly and sh*t...

and you be hangin' out with a b*tch

you don't want to be with.

"Yeah. This is my lady."

That gets you into feelings and sh*t.

When you get married... you have to feel.

My wife says,

"Feel. Express your feelings.

Darling, don't lock it up.

Just speak your mind."

When I was just f***in' around.

I didn't have to say sh*t but...

"Can I f***?

Good-bye.

Here's the money for a cab."

But now,

it's different when you're married.

This is about the time

I've been married...

and it's really exciting.

Because I really am trying.

I really am trying.

I'm telling you,

I'm f***in' trying, okay?

But it's hard to wake up and see

the same person all the f***in' time.

I know this works for women too.

I mean, it's the same motherf***er.

All the time.

"Thank you. Baby, but goddamn!

Not today. Goddamn it.

I don't want to f*** you anymore

tor eight months.

Let's make our sexual life interesting.

You go away for a year.

When you come back,

we will f*** like rabbits."

And my wife's always talkin' about

"express yourself."

"Darling. Express

your feelings. Emotions.

Try to talk.

Try to not be so physical.

Learn how to speak.

Try to talk.

Now. Darling, what is the problem?"

"B*tch, I'm gonna kill you."

My wife is white, and the first

two years we went together...

she thought her name was

White Honky B*tch.

She did.

She put up with the sh*t.

I learned, though. After that,

'cause I was death on her.

"White honky b*tch,

and the black man this...

and you don't know sh*t."

But I stayed with the motherf***er.

I kept staying. I grew some.

It can happen. It it happened to me.

It could happen to you.

She's wonderful

about expressing yourself.

I get mad, I can't even talk.

The madder I get,

the quieter I get.

My voice just goes down a notch,

especially...

"Well. All right.

What I'm trying to do here..."

Feelings are a hard f***ing thing

to deal with.

I don't give a f*** who you are.

It's not easy to be bullshittin'.

But when you get them feelings.

Somebody touches that sh*t inside you...

that sh*t be f***in' with you.

And women, I don't give a f***.

You all can be so cool...

about turnin' a motherf***er oft.

You love when a motherf***er

be in love with you...

'cause you can be some nasty b*tches.

"Darling. Please don't leave me.

Just give me..."

"Oh. God. Are you calling again?

God, Richard, please.

Just don't do this to yourself.

I mean, why don't you go home and bathe

or something like that.

Just don't call here anymore.

Just a minute. John."

How can women be so cool, though.

When you angry?

"Don't you tell me! I love you!

Don't you see?"

"Yes, dear. I'm going for a walk."

"A walk?

I wanna tight!"

One night. I left the house

about 137 times.

I did. I just said,

"F*** you!"

And then I'd have to come back.

Like. You forget your keys.

You ever leave and forget your keys?

"B*tch! Yeah. Motherf***er!

Yeah. Uh-huh!

Believe that sh*t!

Yeah. You'll see.

Oh, sh*t."

Then you got to go

back in the house.

Why come your old lady looks so good

after you've been away tor a while?

You ever. Like. Get your heart broke?

Men here.

You ever had your heart broke?

Women get their heart broke, they cry.

Men don't do that sh*t. Men hold

that sh*t in like it don't hurt...

walkin' around

and get hit by trucks.

"Didn't he see that truck?"

"Motherf***er.

He wouldn't have seen a 747...

'cause his heart was broken."

There's a feelin'... Gettin'

your motherfuckin' heart broke...

it's like, I don't know.

Men cannot graduate till

a woman breaks your f***in' heart.

That is your diploma.

It either kill you or make you fat.

I'm talkin' about that heartache

where your motherfuckin' heart be...

hurtin' and sh*t, and you be...

You can't even listen to music.

Sh*t remind you. Like

"Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer."

"That reminds me of my lady. God.

She got a nose just like Rudolph."

And you go out with other women

when you're in love...

You go out with other women.

It don't mean sh*t. Right?

You go out with other women.

And you hear their voices and go...

"What is this b*tch talkin' about?

Why don't she just shut the f*** up?

She ain't sayin' sh*t."

'Cause it's hard to reestablish

yourself with other people...

once you've been with a partner

tor a long time. Right?

Especially if you get a good woman

that you really be in love with.

Usually. It's the man that fucks up.

We f*** up. Right?

Then we can't find

them motherfuckers no more.

And when you can't find her no more,

it look like she get better.

Every time you see her.

She be beautiful...

or with some other motherf***er

that looked good.

I be going,

"I wanna kill everybody.

Everybody in the world."

That's how you end up

in the penitentiary, jack.

A lot of people in the penitentiary

killed their old ladies and sh*t...

and boyfriends and sh*t like that.

Just flip out.

"I don't give a f***.

At least I don't have

to look at them anymore."

I went to a penitentiary

with Gene Wilder...

I went to a penitentiary

with Gene Wilder...

I did a movie. Not me personally.

I went to do a film in a penitentiary.

I was up there six weeks.

Arizona State Penitentiary.

It was some...

Oh. You're applauding for that?

Arizona State Penitentiary

real popular?

It was strange because

What's strange about that is that

there are no black people in Arizona.

I'm not lying.

They bus motherfuckers in.

I was up there,

and I looked at all the brothers...

and it made my heart ache.

You know...

seeing all these beautiful

black men in the joint.

Goddamn warriors should be out there

helping the masses.

I felt that way.

I was real naive. Right?

And the six weeks I was up there,

I talked to the brothers.

I talked to them.

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