Road to Bali Page #5

An animal snare. - Now we know there

are people on this island.

Hey, there's people up here too.

- I wonder what the locals are like?

- I hope they're not cannibales or headhunters.

I hope they're orange pickers.

I want to get off this tree.

- Oh stop squawking.

- You'll fall off when you are ripe.

I feel like a windsock.

- Hey, where are you going.

-Quiet, somebody is coming.

Hi. Hi. Go ahead.

- Thank you.

- Okay.

Who was that? That's my brother

Bob. I promised him a shot in the picture.

- He's handsome.

- It's a family characteristic.

Help! Get me down! My brain is

rushing to my head.

- Harold?

- Oh yeah, the dangler. Let's get

the sap out of the tree.

-This is the sloppiest hanging I've

ever attended. -ou're saved.

A pardon just came from the Governor.

- Easy now. Steady.

- Say, wish I had a shot of this for

the Tuna club now.

Upsidaisy, let's get him up. Be

careful now.

Oh, I'll never say bottoms-up again.

You got me down just in time. I was

getting tan in the wrong places.

Put your weight on this tree and

hold it. I'll cut the palm. Are you all right?

I'm fi ne. The blood is coming back

to my toes. Now if I could get my

toes back to my feet.

Your sinuses are up-dated.

Where did he go now? Oh this boy

loves to travel. Come on, we'll

bring him a band-aid.

- Harold?

- This way nurse. And bring my toy boats.

- Harooold?

- Over here!

Look.

- Buster! Come on out of there.

- Not me, I'm staying out here

where it's safe.

Hurry now, get out of there. Look in

back of you!

I got you, I got you. Yeah, but he

got ahold of me!

Hey, I feel a breeze. A breeze?

Well, I'll be darned. Colored

television, widescreen too....

Really? Am I there? Just your

best angle. Wish I had my rearview mirror.

Look!

The African Queen.

Humpfrey Bogard...

Boy is he lost!

Hey Bogie...?

Hey, jungle fever. That's what we

got. That was just a mirage.

Yeah, well what about this.

Humphrey's academy award.

An Oscar. Give me that, you've got

one.

Friends.....this is a great occasioin,

me receiving this academy award...

And I'd like to say a word....

Run! That's the word.

-Well, what've we got here? A jungle motel?

- It's a little south for a Brown Derby isn't it?

Hello, anybody home? I'm a

member of the automobile club.

- This is cold. There's been nobody

here for some time.

- We can spend the night here.

Yeah, I'll go sign the register.

Princess Lala, the Honorable

George Cockran and man servant.

- Hey, I found a gun.

- So we heard.

- Oh, that's wonderful. Now one of

you can go out and hunt for food.

- Oh so right Lala.

Say here Annie Oakley. Run out

and shoot us a filet mignon,

medium rare huh?

- Don't hurry. Wait a minute.

- You're the sharp shooter.

This boy played second shotgun

with the Spike Jones band.

Not me, the last thing I shot was

two sixes.

Please, will one of you go out and

hunt for food before it gets too dark.

Okay, here's what we do. The

winner stays here with Lala.

Damn, those republicans are

everywhere.

- That's the junior branch.

- Harold?

- Couldn't sleep huh?

- No.

- Neither could I and for the same reason.

May I sit down?

Little chilly isn't it? You need

something around you. Preferably me.

- Oh, this is so peaceful.

-Yeah, it's what I've always wanted.

Fireside, home, backyard with

flowers, a vegetable garden.

A couple of oil wells.

A home. That's what every girl

dreams of.

I'll make your dreams come true then.

- What about George?

- Well, we can always make him our

babysitter.

Of course we'd have to lock up the liquor.

-Shall we build up the fire?

I'm in flames now, Lala.

- Life girl.

- I never knew love could be such a problem.

- What's the problem?

Auntie M, our chaperon is asleep in there.

- What do we do when we get to Bali.

- You're going to marry me, naturally.

Aren't you?

- Well, I......

- Yes?

No?

Dumbo? Why do you cut into my

scene?

- I'm singing

- You'll never go any place with your

singing. You can't even cry.

- I may have a nervous breakdown in this spot.

- Have one up in the tree will ya?

Yes, I'll say hello to your relatives.

- Harold! George! Get up! Quick!

- What's the matter? Is the bus leaving?

Look out......

It's a female gorilla. It must be the

dead one's mate.

The winner and new champion.

- I'd better put out the cat.

- That guns no good. No.

No? Watch this!

Where did it go?

We may as well relax. We could be

here all night.

- Yeah, let's dig in.

- Call the command post huh?

Hey, wake up. She's not here.

Lala is gone

- Maybe some dirty rat kidnapped her?

- Oh, couldn't be. We're both here.

-Boy, isn't that a beautiful picture?

- Yeah, when does the tide go out?

- How come we don't fall.

- Paramount wouldn't dare. At your age!

Shall we then? Inhale.

- Hey, come on out of there.

- Yeah, time's a wasting.

-I'll see you back at the hut.

- Oh no. We couldn't leave a poor

defenceless girl like you out in the jungle.

You need two defenceless men to

protect you.

Speak for yourself.

- All right. Turn your heads.

Selfish!

- My hair ribbon is gone.

-Hair ribbon? What about your wrap?

- You stay there while I get dressed.

- "What about your wrap." That's nice talk.

- I was just asking.

- Cover up your eyes, like she said.

You never want to have any kind of

fun. That's my type of girl, the

atheletic type.

- When the right type of girl comes along, you'll

be swept off your feet. - My type of girl is right

back there, I want to tell you that.

I know all about swimming. I used

to grease them for the channel swim.

Plenty of boy left over.

Oh George. Come on, cut it out will

you? Quit kidding.

Hey, hey help! GEORGE!

Oh Harold, you pick up with the

darnest people.

Harold...

George! George, where'd you go?

- Buster, don't get excited now.

Play it real cool. Don't antagonize

her. That's the dead gorilla's mate, buster.

What does she want? Revenge?

No, no I'm afraid not.

- Hurry George, this kid's a

junvenille deliquent.

- Keep cool!

- Keep it cool? I'm numb!

- I'll think of something.

- George!!!

- Keep it cool!

- Why am I attractive to young widows?

- I don't like the look in her eyes.

Get a rock, a club, anything. Kill

one of us! - Okay..

Sing to her. You know, music has

charm to soothe the savage beast.

Breast, that is. BEAST, BREAST,

JUST SING!

Down baby. Down girl. I've got a

broken....

Soothe her, soothe her! SING!!!!

Keep singing, and if you get tired,

call Gary.

Help! Help! Harold, George, help!

- They're after me.

- Who?

- The natives!

Get the jewels and run! Keep

working. The natives are here. SING!

- I'm singing.

- Didn't I tell you to sing! Go, go.

Mosquitoes. A rear guard action.

- It's a poison dart.

- What? Call an ambulance, I'm wounded.

-They got you hun? Tell me this is

only a vitamin shot honey.

- This is a doctor G.

It won't kill you. It will just cause

muscular convulsions and then a coma.

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