Rob the Mob Page #6

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I don't know what kind

of America you live in.

Where was that social club?

103rd.

Avenue, right?

I'm standing fat.

What the f***?

All right.

All right, this is a robbery.

What did he say?

I said this is a robbery.

A robbery.

I want all your f***ing rolls.

There's no food here.

It's a bar

I don't want

a roll with butter on,

I want your cash, old man.

I want your cash.

Come on. Everything.

Yes, yes, yes.

Put it... Come on, pick it up.

Put everything... Gramps,

where the hell you going?

Over there, come on.

I don't have nothing.

Oh, yeah? What's that?

What's that?

Nice try. Nice try,

old man. Nice try.

Yeah, you don't have anything.

I need that wallet.

Take the money.

I need that wallet, please.

You're not getting the wallet back.

Please... Take the money.

That's for my liver.

That's for my prostate.

My false teeth,

do you want them?

M-m-my wife gave me

that wallet.

Tell her to buy you a new f***ing wallet.

She's dead.

Have a little decency.

And I need my bus pass.

Listen, if you're going to give him

his bus pass, I want mine, too.

It's only fair, you know.

It's fair.

Nobody's getting their bus pass!

Come on, sir. You look

like a good kid.

Come on.

Come on. Please...

Come on.

Need my head examined.

What color is it? Black.

Here. Here's your wallet.

That's brown! Black!

Come on. Hold on.

I got it, I got it, I got it.

Here's your f***ing wallet,

all right?

Take the money.

I'm taking the money.

What the hell is this,

five dollars?

Take my money,

but give me the wallet.

You know what?

I don't have time for this bullshit!

I don't have time for this.

I got to go.

F***.

Come here, you little f***, you!

Hey! Hey!

Just leave the wallet here.

You know, he still

can throw a punch.

Come here! You don't know what

you're doing, you little prick!

F*** this.

Is this it?

That's it. I told you.

A bunch of senior

citizens in there.

How does this thing work?

On. You press on.

Obviously, I'm pushing on.

If you yell at it, that's what

actually makes it go on.

Oh Rosie, just...

I mean, Jesus Christ.

Did you see this?

Little Anthony

Vinnie Jimmy the Cheese

Wait a minute, let me see.

What is that?

Let me see this.

You know what this is?

It's the family tree.

This is

the entire Vazallo family.

What do these initials mean?

"A." Associate. "C." Capo.

Underboss. Do you know what the

f***ing feds would do for this?

What?

Get on their knees and start sucking.

Why?

Well you see, the Mafia's defense,

their entire defense is that

they just deny that they exist.

They deny

that they're organized.

This is all mapped out for them.

This proves they're organized.

Look, it's got

the ranking, everything.

Who talked to the paper?

Listen to this. "A pair of Mafia

social clubs have been robbed

"by a lone gunman who marches

into the secret societies

"waving an automatic weapon.

"A female companion waits

for him outside

"while he empties

the gangster's pockets.

"The pair, who have reportedly earned

the nickname Bonnie and Clyde,

"then drive off in a gun-metal

gray Buick Century."

Motherf***er!

Shh!

This is bad.

They want us to talk.

Who?

I don't f***ing know,

whoever wrote

the f***ing article.

How can they want us to talk

if they don't know who we are?

Listen. Rose?

What?

Are you listening to me?

Yes. It's not the f***ing cops,

right?

No. It can't be

the f***ing cops.

Right. Because if

it was the cops...

Hey.

If it was the f***ing cops,

right, we'd be arrested.

But it's not the Mafia.

No.

Because they're embarrassed. And we'd

be in the back in the trunk by now.

So who the f*** is it?

Where the hell would they

f***ing get a picture like this?

You know what?

Tommy.

We should call them.

Call who? Who?

The mob guys.

Oh yeah, we should call them.

What the f***

are you talking about?

We have to get to them

before they get to us.

Hey, hey, hey,

you want that good stuff.

Here you go.

Did you hear me?

We can't f***ing call them.

We got this list. It's not worth

nothing if they don't know we have it.

So call them and blackmail them?

Say we got the f***ing list

so don't f*** with us.

Because why?

We're f***ing crazy!

Who should we call?

Hello?

Hey, Vinny?

How's it going?

Yeah, it's going fantastic. We're having a

bowl of soup and ice skating. Who is this?

Bonnie and Clyde, motherf***er!

Come on, who is this?

Is this a joke?

You know,

I was just checking in.

I just wanted to give you

some hair compliments.

You know, I'm wearing

your f***ing shoes right now.

Oh yeah, motherf***er?

Yeah.

You like the shoes?

Yeah.

How about I put them back on

and I f***ing kick your ass

until both shoes are shitty?

How'd you get this number?

How did I get your number?

Vinny, I don't just got

your number.

I got your number,

I got your f***ing rank.

I got your nickname.

By the way, you're pretty low

on the list.

What's the list?

What the f*** are you talking about?

I have everyone.

Trace the call.

The entire f***ing family,

all the way up to Big AI. That's right.

What are you telling me for?

Vinny, I want you

to tell everyone.

I mean all your f***ing

grease ball friends.

It's the same kid

from the holdup.

F*** with us, and every single

Fed is going to have this list.

How about you f***ing

hang up the phone

and you go f*** your mother.

Right now.

Let me reiterate,

motherf***er. All right?

I got a will.

In that f***ing will,

I got a P.O. box.

In that P.O. box,

I got a list.

Yeah?

Yeah.

Anything happens to us,

I mean, man, anything!

Anything happens to me

or f***ing Bonnie,

we're going to take the whole

f***ing family down, a**hole.

That was so good!

That was good?

What are you wearing, tights?

It's just f***ed up, Sal.

You're telling me.

What?

I just got off the phone with Clyde.

Clyde who?

Bonnie and f***ing Clyde, Sal.

This Clyde? How the f***

did he get the number?

That's what I asked him,

but he's talking about he's got "the list".

A list?

Vinny, he said a list?

Talking about he's got

names and ranks.

Goes all the way up to Big AI.

What the f*** is the list, Sal?

It's a pact.

A guy gets picked up

for something, whatever,

he calls the guy with the list

who lets them all know

the other guy's in trouble

before the Feds can get to them.

That way the Feds

can't get everyone

to rat each other out.

And this guy carries the list with him?

Yeah. Joey D.

Anthony? It's Monday afternoon.

Where's Joey D today?

Joey D is at the Miracle Lanes

Bowling Center.

All right, pal.

Make sure you feed him.

Bowling shoes!

I'm going to bring you your food.

Just stay where you are.

I'm going to stay here.

Okay.

I will not go away from here.

Okay.

I will stay here.

Yeah, that's good.

I'm going to bring you the food.

You can do that.

And I'll-I'll eat it.

- Cardozo.

- Mr. Cardozo...

I read your story

in today's paper

and I am disappointed

in its many inaccuracies.

Yeah? Okay, I'm sorry

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